Remember that time when all of America got together and exclaimed, in true Chandler fashion, “Underwater Dogs, can they BE any cuter?!” The answer is yes and they’re calling it Underwater Puppies, Seth Casteel’s newest photo book (coming at ya in 2014).
Honestly, we’re not sure if anything can steal the throne from these soggy lil’ pups—but that didn’t stop us from scouring the internet to see if we could find things that are at least comparable (and having several darling heart attacks in the process). Don’t thank us! Thank the universe. Thing is, only you can decide between what’s cute, what’s crazy-cute, and what’s making you long to hug your computer. Let this list be your guide.
1. The little girl in that old Volvo commercial
Straight up? I dislike most precocious children (I don’t like being being proven wrong by someone who may or may not wet the bed—this includes some of my friends from college) but I love how this little girl babbles. I feel a special affinity for her because after two or 12 vodka sodas, I am this little girl—only instead of talking about a weird bug I saw, I drunk dial my dad on my walk to Chipotle and tell him how much I love him and how I’m going to only buy two tacos because they give you enough stuff for four, and does he regret that I gave up softball for theater in the 9th grade? If you look reeeeeally closely at the dad in this commercial, you can see that he can’t wait for her to grow up and behave similarly because that’s every dad’s dream. Let’s see that commercial, right? Your move, Volvo.
2. That a panda kindergarten exists in China
Stop what you’re doing right now and rewind to a fact we learned in 2008: right now, as we speak, there are pandas being studied in Chengdu in a place they call panda kindergarten. They could’ve called it “panda lab” or “panda research facility” but they didn’t, and why not? Because baby pandas be having fun. They don’t wanna wait their turn on the slide! They wanna stand on toys you’re supposed to sit on! They give each other overly aggressive hugs! Pandas are just like us. Now someone please cover me in a pile of them. Thanks.
3. Orangutan and dog friendship
If you don’t care to watch the best video of the best friendship in the universe, please at least skip ahead to 2:43 where Surya the orangutan is riding a bike and then walks her dog-bestie Roscoe on a leash. But I guarantee you’ll like the entire video unless you’re some kind of monster.
Also, for those people who require their cute things to be underwater, these two pals go swimming together, so I think we’re done here.
4. Old people living their lives like being cute is no big deal
As usual, Tumblr steps in to bring into existence the stuff my heart yearns for. Old people wearing corsages! Old people holding balloons! Old person at a salad bar while listening to his boombox on a pair of giant earphones! Never leave me, Internet.
5. Puppy that cannot roll over
Someone. Please. Roll this puppy over, put him straight into a basket and bring him to my house—where I will roll him back over onto his back and watch this whole thing live. Then, I will kiss his tiny puppy face and we will go play in our pile of baby pandas. I can barely express what this makes me feel. Maybe this will help.
6. Animals taking care of other animals
Excuse me, here are some pictures of a lil’ chimp feeding a tiger cub out of a baby bottle.
7. Babies looking at other babies
If you don’t take our word for it, how about we let a few YouTube commenters make our case for us (chosen at random).
- “SO CUTE!!!!!!!! THOSE ARE FUNNY BABY’S”
- “Babies, you got to love them. All those people who dislike are blind! Plz be calm if your blind and call the doctor or 911 before you kill yourselves. Go figure! (Note: this was from a user whose name has “God” in the handle.)
- Omg like so awesome baby’s
- Little do we know they’re planning world domination
Honorable cute mention goes to the camera holder’s third (and hopefully not ignored) child who is clearly watching The Little Mermaid and starts yelling “A-wiel!” around 0:38. Omg like so awesome baby’s AND other kids!
8. Tiny versions of big animals
Please understand that this isn’t about baby animals. This is about tiny versions of larger animals that are, incidentally, being photographed next to each other. Some say “genetic mutation,” we say, “fits right in your pocket“!
9. Katy Perry singing “Firework” with Jodi DiPiazza
What is it with this video? Is it that Katy Perry is performing a lovely version of “Firework” accompanied by Jodi, an 11-year-old musician who also has autism? Is it the fact that Katy Perry is clearly singing softly so that Jodi’s voice shines through? No. Well, yesm it’s all those things (say what you will about Katy Perry, but nope, I won’t stop liking her and calling her by her first and last name for some reason.) However, what can really warm the heart of someone who’s closed themselves off to love forever is the way Jodi hugs Katy Perry at the end. Oof.
Are any of these things cuter than underwater puppies?