Customer Reviews for

Beauty Queens

Average Rating 3.5
( 181 )
Rating Distribution

5 Star

(75)

4 Star

(45)

3 Star

(21)

2 Star

(18)

1 Star

(22)

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Most Helpful Favorable Review

11 out of 13 people found this review helpful.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go unscrew my smile!

Wow. I may not have been a crazy stalker fan of Libba Bray beforehand (the Gemma Doyle series didn't do anything for me - yes, you may duct-tape me now), but I think Beauty Queens has me wondering what crazy schemes this author will cook up next because I'm pretty sure ...
Wow. I may not have been a crazy stalker fan of Libba Bray beforehand (the Gemma Doyle series didn't do anything for me - yes, you may duct-tape me now), but I think Beauty Queens has me wondering what crazy schemes this author will cook up next because I'm pretty sure that I will be in that serving line! Even if it is chicken-tasting grub from some random island.

I realize that this book may not be for everyone - I wasn't even 1% sure if Beauty Queens would be my cup of tea. Yes, I was that uncertain of it. I kept glancing at the book in the bookstores, admiring the lipstick bullet belt concept, but unsure if I was ready for a leap of faith. So I borrowed it from the library and took the book out for a spin.

And holy smokes! Did Beauty Queens grab my attention from the get-go and shook me silly in a similar fashion that Miss Congeniality did? Except 200% more to the power of infinity and whatever goes beyond that? I think flying toasters might be involved in the beyond.

As far-fetched as Beauty Queens may sound, Libba Bray really applies her witty parody quite liberally like sunscreen - and I loved all her shout-outs and snark-outs that celebrated (or eulogized) all things pop culture. Everything was outrageous - everything, that is, except the message that it is okay to be yourself, even if that includes a little crazy or ugly or random. I cannot imagine how much FUN Ms. Bray had with re-inventing the world of pop culture because they are truly quite clever!

What really impressed me with Beauty Queens is how the girls were introduced to the readers via pageant bios and then the next chapter focused on digging deep into what makes them tick, even though everything was told in third-person. It really gave me enough time to connect with each girl and then gradually tie them as one large group into the main story arc. With so many characters to juggle around and decide who gets centerstage for certain moments, I give props to Libba Bray for managing to find a way to make it easy for the readers to befriend the characters. It almost felt like 4 years of high school with a class of 200+ individuals - you start off as strangers, but leave as one big family.

I think Libba Bray may very well be the next Douglas Adams or Joseph Heller in my book. Not a whole lot of authors can serve such a ridiculous dish of random that makes me clutch my stomach from laughing too hard and yet I couldn't stop from devouring the pages!

And for your reading pleasure (in truth, this is for my own because I probably inhaled a pepperoni up my nose when I read this snippet), bar none my favoritest quote from the book because the delivery is GOLDEN:

"I count the time like my hemorrhoids."
"TMI, MoMo."
"TMI to you, too, my darling."

Please excuse me while I ROFL with pepperoni up my nose. (Dear Readers, you may just want to go out and try this random slice of paradise.)

posted by epicrat on October 1, 2011

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Most Helpful Critical Review

31 out of 57 people found this review helpful.

Question..Can I have my brain cells back?

I picked this book up off a display and thought it would be absolutely hilarious and a great read because it was by Libba Bray, unfortunately it was a dissapointment. This book should be on the back shelf not on a display for everyone to see. If you can get over the mai...
I picked this book up off a display and thought it would be absolutely hilarious and a great read because it was by Libba Bray, unfortunately it was a dissapointment. This book should be on the back shelf not on a display for everyone to see. If you can get over the main characters ghaustly language and bimbo mindset then it might actually be good, but it drove me insane. There was just to much going on! From lesbian contestants to transexual contestants, to the undercover contestant, the contestant that somehow survives the entire time with a tray sticking out of her head and the contestant that loses her mind that was enough...then we have the reality TV show british hunky pirates that land on the island. You can't forget the military/corporation compound hidden on the island making arms deals with the Republic of ChaCha (??really??) that happens to be with a guy that dresses like Elvis?? AND being from Texas it was a little upseting that the Miss Texas contestant talks like she is the biggest redneck hick known to man..and she is the biggest bimbo of all minus the knowledge of using guns..then happens to be the one that goes completely insane...yeah...not cool.
To much for me..I mean you may like this but I would personally like my time and brain cells back. Saying this book was a dissapointment and a disaster is being nice.

posted by cara_ann on May 26, 2011

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  • Anonymous

    Posted November 1, 2011

    Extremely disappointing!

    I usually love Libba Bray. I love her Gemma Doyle series; its one of my favorites. I was expecting so much more from her. The characters in this book were so flat, un-relatable, and everything bad about American girls today. The plot was so horribly thought out and didn't even make very much sense in my opinion. I will hope for better in her next books...

    1 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted August 30, 2011

    The worst book I've ever read (partially)

    I had to stop at page 204 and I am actually surprised that I read that much. Anyway, I am being kind calling this book - a piece of crap. It started very funny at the beginning. I thought this is one of those very girly, cheesy, funny, entertaining books and I expected a lots of laughs, and indeed was Ok at start but then :O Oh boy.. at some point I felt like reading this book hurting my brain i had to stop and delete and try to forget bunch of nonsense writing. From commercial interruptions to snake who ate one of the girls (girl managed to escape :S) to explosive hair products, reality show pirates, weird interview interruptions.. I mean this book is so stupid to the point that is disturbing to read.

    1 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted August 25, 2011

    i would return it if i could...

    i saw the book on display and thought "what the hell!" but no... this book is so mindless and boring, the characters are so dumb y just had to put it down... i don't think i'll ever finish it... what a wate of time/money

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted August 19, 2011

    Most disappointing

    I have enjoyed Libba Bray's trilogy prior to rrading this and expected greatness. Instead I found an underdeveloped storyline, repeated filler, and cheap writing tricks to fill up the pages. If the writer had taken her time wiyh this book and flushed out the plot as was done in Great and Terrible Beauty the book could have had the potential for excellence. I have one thing to say to you Libba Bray, shame on you.

    1 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted August 3, 2011

    more from this reviewer

    All the right plot points but...

    Perhaps my expectations were impossibly high, how could they not be after a masterpiece like Going Bovine?
    Beauty Queens starts off beautifully (no pun intended) - a mysterious plane crash, quirky characters, and the challenge of surviving without food, shelter, and -gasp- lip gloss! Libba Bray makes it clear that this is not aLost or Lord of the Flies inspired story, but it could have been a brilliant and witty comeback to both. A female alternative to Golding's story would have made for great discussion in schools and public libraries. With generous influences from fellow 'dystopian' novels like M.T. Anderson's Feed, a materialistic world run underhandedly by The Corporation and fellow countries with Chavez-inspired dictators produces shallow, narcissistic teenage girls, and what archetype is more extreme than the beauty pageant girl. The demand is there with shows abound on cable networks and the 2007 Miss Teen USA pageant's Miss South Carolina interview fiasco.
    Unfortunatly, all the sarcastic commercials and witty dialogue could not save a potentially awesome story. If the intention was to show shallow teens finding their inner Girl Power, or bridge the gap between petty differences to encourage girls across the spectrum to unite against a world that demands skinny, perfectly coiffured, pleasant and unopiniontated girls, then it was an 'epic fail'. Bray should have focused on one goal instead of branching off into weak tangeants. Is it a survival story? If so, leave out the government and corporation conspiracies. Outside characters were two-dimensional and drew away from the already too-large cast at hand. And what was with the ship full of cockney-accented actors and the Australian eco-warrior that popped up out of nowhere to woo the girls. Was a love-plot that necessary? The romance that blossomed briefly between two of the girls could have been an all-encompassing focus on positive relationships in general.
    All-in-all, I cringed more than I smiled, and said, "Huh?" more than "Ha!" The potential was strong, but the inconsistent messages, thin characters, and silly plot-twists left me disappointed. Libba Bray has shown true talent in past YA novels, but this one felt rushed and un-loved.

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted August 22, 2014

    Fun&Quirky

    I read this book and it was surprisingly entertaining given the fact that it was about a bunch of beauty pageants

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  • Anonymous

    Posted August 10, 2014

    I love Love

    I love the way that the author wrote this book and I felt like she really connected with the readers. It was so funny and it made me laugh. I love all of the characters and it would be hard for me to pick my favorite character. The ending though is quite strange but yet it is delivers a powerful message at the end and is developed throughout the whole story. I would recomend this book.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted March 9, 2014

    So good

    Must read book!

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  • Anonymous

    Posted December 3, 2013

    Poorly written

    This book was hard for me to follow. While there were entertaining parts about the characters, I felt they were under developed. Very strange read.

    0 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted July 21, 2013

    Skip

    Skip it

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  • Anonymous

    Posted July 18, 2013

    Amazinnng!

    Hilarious and entertaining.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted July 8, 2013

    Terrible

    This book is all satire. Not a leisurely beach read.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted July 8, 2013

    Don't waste your time or money

    I have no idea why anyone in their right mind would publish this. Let alone why the author, who's name I fail to remember but should because her writing is horrible, is a claimed best selling author. The characters were poorly developed and so alike it was hard to distinguish between who was who. The events in the story became so ridiculous that I only continued to read to see how horribly worse it could get. I knew it would but even I wasn't prepared. Don't waste your time or money.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted June 26, 2013

    Its a world of pretty

    This was the most fun I

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  • Anonymous

    Posted May 18, 2013

    Real good

    Pretty good

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  • Anonymous

    Posted May 8, 2013

    Great, fun, summer read! I didn't think I was going to enjoy thi

    Great, fun, summer read! I didn't think I was going to enjoy this book because usually I don't like to read about a bunch of stuck up girls, but this book was excellent! A little predictable, but definitely deserving of a second read! If you're looking for a book that is fun but still exciting, this is the book for you!

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  • Anonymous

    Posted April 13, 2013

    Nigeria

    I am

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  • Anonymous

    Posted March 14, 2013

    Y

    It is like a girl's version of lord of the flies

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  • Anonymous

    Posted February 18, 2013

    Love

    I'm listening on an audiobook right now and love it!!!!!!

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  • Anonymous

    Posted February 11, 2013

    To number 29

    Me too!!!!!! Nigerianss rock!!!!
    Not that other people dont though so plz dont take it the wrong way.

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