Table of Contents
Foreword Henry Cloud 9
Introduction: Don't Settle 11
Part 1 Understanding the Problem 19
1 The Draw to Relationship 23
2 The Damage Arrives 31
3 Boundaries and What They Accomplish 37
4 The Return of Desire 45
Part 2 Knowing when You're Ready 59
5 You Admit the Hurt and Receive Support 61
6 You Understand Your Own Past Choices 67
7 You Can Connect the Dots 77
8 You Grieve and Let it Go 89
9 You Develop Growth Friendships 103
10 You Trust Your Defining Boundaries 115
11 You Let Your Values Transform Your Desires 129
12 You Know Which Risks Are Worth. Taking and Which Are Not 139
Part 3 Knowing when the Other Person is Ready 153
13 Does This Person Care About His or Her Impact on You? 155
14 Is This Person (Really) Connected to Good People? 167
15 Can This Person Handle a Relationship with You? 183
16 For Dating and Marriage: Does This Person Go Beyond Passion? 197
17 Is the Big Problem Being Solved the Right Way? 209
Part 4 Moving into the Relationship 223
18 The Talk You Must Have 225
19 Take a Risk 237
20 Deal with Speed Bumps 247
21 How Far Can You Go? 259
Conclusion: Beyond Boundaries into Your Best Life 269
Notes 271