The Explosive Child: A New Approach for Understanding and Parenting Easily Frustrated, Chronically Inflexible Children

If you are considering this book- buy it!

I've never written a review before, but after reading this book last night (yes, the whole book in one sitting), I had to write to other desparate parents out there to tell them they won't regret buying this book. We've been dealing with 'explosions' from my 5 year old son since we moved to a new town 11 months ago. I finally took him to a child psychologist a few weeks ago and after describing his behavior, she recommended this book. I stayed up really late last night reading the book and it describes my son to a TEE. I couldn't believe how accurate it is and it made me feel so much better to read about other children who act identically to him. AND to learn that it's not my parenting, it's a learning disability (according to Dr. Greene, these children have yet to learn how to deal with frustration, thus it's a learning disability but nothing that can't be taught). What's great about looking at my son's explosions this way, as opposed to him 'being difficult' or 'manic' or 'defiant' is that I'm approaching it much more calmly and compassionately. As Dr. Greene puts it, I have to be my son's frontal lobe until he can learn to verbalize and problem solve. The book offers some great, great, great insights and advice. I already implemented one of the suggestions this morning, less than 12 hours after reading the book, and it totally worked to diffuse what was turning into an 'episode' or 'explosion'. It ended up that my son did not get his way, but in the end, it seemed to him like he did because we solved the problem together. Normally, if my son doesn't get his way, he has a violent explosion. But by using the methods in this book (specifically Emergency Plan B), I was able to calm him down, talk rationally about the problem, and come to a satisfactory resolution for both of us. I can't wait to share this book with my husband, my son's grandparents and his preschool teachers.

12 out of 12 people found this review helpful.

An exceptionally helpful book

The Explosive Child is the most helpful book on difficult children that I have ever read. My 14 year old son is described perfectly by Dr. Greene & his approach is very easy to implement. After discussing how to decide if something is really worth arguing about, he offers great ideas for teaching extremely inflexible kids how to negotiate & compromise without having a tantrum. It was reassuring to know that my son's behavior is not unique and there are practical ways of dealing (i.e. preventing) outbursts. I wish I had read this book years ago. His methods apply to all ages, including teenagers.

3 out of 3 people found this review helpful.

Great resource for parents, teachers, and anyone who works with easily frustrated, explosive children.

This is a wonderful book for understanding an easily frustrated, explosive child. One of the key phrases in this book that I loved is "Children do well if they can." It emphasizes that an easily frustrated child is necessarily trying to make things difficult, but that they do not possess all the developmental and cognitive tools to process information and find more plausible solutions. It is our responsibility as parents, teachers, or other adults that work with children to help to teach these children more productive ways of dealing with life's challenges. I highly recommend this book!

2 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

eye opening

If you have an "explosive child" like I do, then this is VERY helpful and gives great insight. He helps you understand how to deal with your child's behavior in a sensible way. I'm still reading it and it has already helped me better understand where my little one is coming from. I recommend the book to all who have a child like this and doctors and therapists also, to not mis-diagosis them and give them meds that won't help.

2 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

Let's Enjoy Our Children

A big thanks to Dr. Greene for looking inside children with a thoughtful, hopeful approach that takes into consideration their unique wiring. This philosophy is the foundation of our own unique approach called Celebrate!ADHD...in which we restore a child's confidence, purpose and joy by focusing on the child's natural gifts, talents and passions. www.celebrateADHD.com Often times the child who is explosive and defiant also has some characteristics that we value in trailblazing entrepreneurs, scientists, inventors and entertainers. They have passion and incredible focus on their gifts, they have the persistence to continue working toward their dreams even when others say it can't be done. Let's not try to make these kids act like everyone else for our own convenience--or the convenience of teachers and schools. Let's take stock of their unique qualities, turn negatives into positives and focus their energy on their strengths. Above all, let's enjoy our children. Thanks again to Dr. Greene for his work. This book will help many parents.

2 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

Finally--Someone Understands!

This book was the first of many we read that not only explained the characteristics of the problem but actually walked us through step-by-step how to help. At age four our oldest child was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome and ADHD and was a terror--I was embarrassed to take him out in public, because people with 'normal' children always thought his tantrums were due to bad parenting. Initially, I was skeptical of Dr. Greene's approach, but he addressed all of my skepticisms! I would certainly recommend that parents who struggle with an inflexible, explosive child give this book a try. (Note: We used this approach in conjuction with starting medication, so it may have been the combination of the two that did the trick.)

2 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

Head line

It was dineamite!

1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

EXCELLENT RESOURCE

THIS BOOK HAS BEEN VERY HELPFUL. IT VALIDATES MANY OF MY OWN BELIEFS. I FIND MYSELF MENTALLY REFERRING TO THE BOOK WHENEVER I'M IN TOUGH SITUATIONS AND THINKING BEFORE I RESPOND. I FEEL A LOAD TAKEN OFF MY SHOULDERS. IT'S COMFORTING TO HAVE THIS SUPPORT!

1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

A dream come true

This was the most helpful book in dealing with my son. Finally an approach that works!

1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

Wonderful Book

Finally a book that not only explains the reasons why my child acts the way he does - but gave me workable solutions! If your family is suffering from having a child with this disorder - order this book immediately!

1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

Have been a psychotherapist working exclusively with children an

Have been a psychotherapist working exclusively with children and adolescents for the past 14 years. When working with parents who are struggling with a child who struggles with maladaptive behaviors, I without hesitation refer them to this book. As opposed to most "parenting" books, this read illustrates the importance of addressing the "why" a behavior is happening and not simply teaching traditional behavioral appoaches such as a token economy or a reward/punishment model. Courtesy of this book and the Collaborative Problem Solving approach to therapy, I have numerous examples of families I've worked with that began therapy feeling hopeless and overwhelmed only to finish therapy feeling optimisitic and connected with their once labeled "explosive child".

not helpful for very young children and not much new

this book had some explanation of the wiring issues that can be causing the outbursts. the solutions offered however were nothing that i haven't seen other places. i think that "How to Talk so Kids Will Listen; How to Listen so Kids Will Talk" does a much better job. Greene's solutions are approaches that I think can benefit all kids, not just explosive ones. Having said that, I think "How to Talk..." is a better use of your money. The reason I chose to try this book is that I was hoping for some help with my daughter who is three and has been having tantrums where she throws, hits, and kicks that last twenty minutes on average for about 14 months. Because she is still so young, talking it over with her preemptively really doesn't help. I've tried many times. So Greene has nothing to offer if your child can't think about future events in a constructive way. There were a few helpful tidbits to remind me that she doesn't want to behave that way and that she does have a physiological delay. But beyond that, not much.

very worthwhile read

very informative and useful

FANTASTIC!

Wonderful new innovative evidence based model!
All parents should give this a good read

A helpful resource for parents

A helpful book for parents seeking effective strategies for dealing with their challenging children. As a social worker, I often recommend this book to my clients who are looking for easy to use, effective parenting strategies.

Liana Lowenstein, MSW
Author of, "Creative Interventions for Troubled Children and Youth"

An answer to a parents nightmare in reading this book!!

This book has brought light to me about my daughters temper tantrums. I promise that you will understand your child so much better if you actually read this book and use the techniques. I felt like a parent that could not do anything right but now I feel like I'm helping us both. My daughter would all of a sudden go crazy or I would say something that would trigger her but either way it was bad. She would have short tantrums (5 to 10 minutes) and long tantrums (30 minutes and comatosed afterwards). We would never know how long it would last and it was always just involving her (she would not harm anyone else). And we had tried everything. So I have a friend who is a behavioral doctor that I begged to see my daughter because I truely thought their might be something very worng with her. And as a parent you fell so stupid not being able to help. My doctor friend saw her and told me that nothing was wrong that was going to hurt her, but she was probably delayed in the emotional development part of her brain. He then told me to read this book....The Best Thing I Have Ever Read!!! It really helps!

Great guidelines for all parents

I don't usually turn to parenting literature to solve problems at home, but when my three year old's outbursts started to escalate I began to desperately search for a good approach. This book provides a well developed framework and a flexible strategy for helping my whole family address our daughter's explosions. Instead of her explosions ruining her (and our) whole day, we have managed to reduce their frequency and intensity. This is a great guide for all parents, not just children with chronic explosiveness. All kids/adults go through some phases when they are inflexible, and this book is helpful for everyone.

Explosive Child: A New Approach for Understanding and Parenting Easily Frustrated, Chronically Inflexible Children

This book is helpful for parents with difficult children. It addresses the causes of oppositional behaviors, temper tantrums, etc.. There is plenty of good practical advice.

Explosive Child: A New Approach for Understanding and Parenting Easily Frustrated, Chronically Inflexible Children

This book helps parents to understand their children's behavior. Very readable and informative.

Great for school counselors!

This book gave me great insight for helping explosive students that I have at my high school! I learned more from reading this book than from a whole semester of classes.I will recommend this book to many parents for years to come. Thank you Dr. Greene!