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The Friend Who Got Away: Twenty Women's True Life Tales of Friendships that Blew Up, Burned Out or Faded Away

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  • Anonymous

    Posted September 20, 2006

    friendship is wonderful and complicated

    True, honest stories that suck you in with sublime writing and impart enormous insight into female relationships. Must reading for women wishing to improve theirs. Whereas beloved women have slipped in and out of my life like a dream, I now feel more conscious of the psychological and emotional intricacies that were in play. And sometimes life just happens--people change, circumstances change, nothing is forever. Sometimes it's nobody's fault, and acceptance frees you up for something better.

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted March 30, 2013

    more from this reviewer

    'The Friend' Found Its Way In These Essays The Friend Who Got A

    'The Friend' Found Its Way In These Essays

    The Friend Who Got Away: Twenty Women’s True Life Tales of Friendships that Blew Up, Burned Out or Faded Away by Jenny Offill and Elissa Schappell (author of Blueprints for Building Better Girls, which is on my Kindle) is a book of essays written by women who lost a female friendship. Some were by choice, others by mistake, and a few for no reason at all. As a woman who is entering her 30′s, I have begun to experience first hand the effects of losing a longtime female friendship for no other reason other than drifting away, and I have ended some by choice.

    What I loved about this book is that it’s honest. The introduction discusses how it’s okay to breakup with lovers, but that female friendship rarely end with a clean break. This is because women hold each other to higher standards, and to commit an act of betrayal against a female friend is much worse than having done so in a romantic relationship (and women also grant other women more leeway in their behaviors).

    While all of the essays were great, I was most intrigued by the back-to-back essays written by two women who had lost their friendship years before. It was fascinating to see two different people describe their perception of the friendship and its dissolution, demonstrating that each person perceives and feels things different.

    This is a great book for any woman who has ever lost a friend to time, betrayal, or simply to the circumstances of life. It was nice to realize that I am not alone and that it’s okay not to feel guilty about the ending of a friendship. It’s more important for women to celebrate the time they had together than to focus on the drifting apart.

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  • Posted September 27, 2011

    more from this reviewer

    wonderful, women need to read our stories

    The writing in this book is good enough to eat. I think we write best about things we know well, things near and dear to our heart. And friends are. Surprisingly, the stories are not such downers, because they also tell how friends are made and grow and how dear they can be. And then they end, not because there's something wrong with us. But because we just quit needing each other so much, or grow differently, and that's life. it's okay.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted September 9, 2009

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  • Anonymous

    Posted June 16, 2011

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