Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child

Real solutions for getting your baby to sleep

I am a stay at home mom of a 5 mo old boy and have been using this book since he was 2 1/2 months old and I love it! I use it all the time to refer to. What I like is that it gives you step by step instructions for getting your child to sleep. Until he was 4 months I did not let him cry at all. I tried soothing him to sleep, but then he would just wake up a few minutes later. He was really fighting anything I tried to soothe him. I got to the point where I felt like nothing I was doing was helping anyway. Then I decided to start letting him cry it out. It was the hardest thing to do, I cried with him pretty much the entire time. I started with his morning nap and he cried the entire time and I went to get him after an hour. Then he took his next 2 naps and went down for the night with soothing. The next day he took his morning nap fine but then cried though his 1st afternoon nap, the entire hour once again. He took his 3rd nap and went down fine for bedtime. The next day he cried for 45 min for his morning nap. Since then, he cries very little and goes down so easily! I was on the verge of giving up but I am so glad I didn't. I can not even tell you how liberating it is to be able to put your baby down - whether the baby is asleep or awake - it will change your life! He now sleeps from 7pm-6:30 am and takes 3 naps at about 8:30am, noon, and 3:30pm. He is so happy! I recommend it to anyone with babies they are struggling to get to sleep!

6 out of 7 people found this review helpful.

Weissbluth Offers Sage, Caring Advice

I found the information in this book to be very sound and doable as it is based on an entire career of research and experience as a clinician, pediatrician and well as a father of 4 children. Living in Chicago, I wish to share that Weissbluth has a long standing well-respected reputation. For me, this book taught my husband and I a variety of strategies regarding various sleep issues as our baby grew older. Most recently we consulted the book for the step by step process of how to get our 3 year old to stay in HIS bed all night. It takes tenacity and consistency (and maybe a couple of glasses of wine) to execute over a 3-4 day period...but the extinction method worked and I am so grateful my husband and I stuck it out. If you have a child that won't stay in his bed after you tuck him in...this book offers a way to solve the problem. This is THE book for handling all sleep problems. For more tips on managing a variety of related toddler/preschooler behaviors particularly common at bedtime (such as tantrums, bad words, power struggles, whining and many more), I wish to recommend 'The Pocket Parent'. Weissbluth is quoted several times in the chapter on Bedtime Refusals and Nighttime Fears. --These are two parent freindly books you can refer to again and again for insight and strategies that work.

6 out of 6 people found this review helpful.

A Must Read for Sanity

I was a Sears follower (an auther and pediatrician who encourages parents to always attend to children's cries during the night, otherwise called 'Nightime Parenting'). After 9 months my baby was still waking up 2-4 times per night and was sleeping erratically during the day for at most 2 hours, but usually less than one hour naps. We all were exhausted. I read this book and realized that I had not taught my daughter how to put herself to sleep, we had been running to her every whim during the night and she expected us to help her fall asleep. Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child is a must read if you have a child who is not sleeping well. I now know that sleep is as critical to my baby as eating and stimulation. Our baby, now 10 months old, goes to bed at 6:00 pm and sleeps through to 6:00 am. She naps at 8:30 for an hour or two and then again at 12:30 for an hour or two. I lay her down and she rarely cries. Bed time is a joy. This book is a must read....

5 out of 5 people found this review helpful.

This was my sleep bible for the first 2 years!!!

My husband and I walked in to the pediatrician's office bleary eyed and exhausted with our 4-month old son, and practically begged for help. Without hesitation he recommended this book to us and it worked. I love it because unlike many other parenting books that are filled with emotionally charged discussions and mud-slinging for or against one style vs. another, this book only deals in facts and medical research on sleep patterns and brain cycles and how they change over the course of those precious first 2 years.

This is not a book that advocates letting your child scream his lungs out, I am not at all a fan of the Ferber method. What I did like is that he says in fact, if you learn when your childs' ideal sleep window is, they will fall asleep much more readily and easily without the screaming than when they are overtired. I did have to endure a few nights of protest crying, but they lasted no more than 20 minutes and there was no distressed crying.

There were parts of the book that were very clinical and somewhat dry as he attempts to build your understanding of the physiological needs for sleep, and I found myself skipping around a bit to the sections that pertained to my sons age to read the examples he gave. Just as he predicts, we would fall in to a time where the sleep schedule just didn't seem to be working and after a few frustrating days of a cranky baby I would remind myself to pick up the book and review his suggestions on how to make modifications, and they worked- EVERY TIME!

There are some people who believe that being disciplined about their child's sleep is inconvenient for their schedule as parents, but I found the opposite to be true! No my kids did not fall asleep in their strollers or in car seats out at restaurants, and yes, I did have to modify my life for a couple of years, with a few exceptions, to insure that they got all of the sleep they needed, but the results were worth it. We had happy, delightful, never overtired babies. They had a consistently early bed time which meant relaxation and time alone for us as a couple. And now at 4 and 6 years old we have boys that are well rested and ready to learn. Even now when we have the occasional late night bed time, or when we are on vacation or traveling, I can really see a difference in their behavior with a little sleep deficit; particularly if the deficit occurs over several nights. However, because of this book and the training it provides, it is very easy to make some adjustments and get them down early for a few nights and we are back on track!

I have two boys and both of them were very different in terms of their sleep patterns and needs. My youngest son never has slept as long at night or taken long naps like my oldest son. This book does not prescribe a one size fits all approach to developing good sleep habits. It gives you the ranges of what is considered normal and what the brain needs at each given age bracket and will require you to observe your child carefully over several days and invest a little bit of time in to changing your bedtime routines and patterns until you find their magic window where they fall asleep with very little crying.

If you want a factual, informative book on how to create healthy sleep habits that will last for life-than this book is for you!

4 out of 4 people found this review helpful.

This method hasn't failed yet

I am a mom to five kids and have used this method successfully on four of my children (my youngest is just 12 weeks and we're about to undertake sleep training once again). Anyway, I notice that the majority of the reviews are positive and I can't add much to the comments except to give a brief description of our success for the faint of heart. Plus, I would like to point out that those of us who opt for this method are NOT cruel or lazy or selfish (as some of the negative reviewers imply). We are simply parents doing what we feel is best for our children, our families and our own mental health. I know for me this book truly saved me from deepening depression, anxiety, and anger (towards my husband, my baby, and my other children as each baby came). When I was a chronically sleep-deprived mother I was not capable of being the mother that I wanted to be. My experience: Baby #1) Boy, started training at 3 1/2 months. He was colicky and slept a total of 8-9 hours out of 24. When not nursing or sleeping, he was crying. The only way I managed him was by walking (up to 6 miles a day) just so he wouldn't cry. I was burned out, resentful, wanting to return to work just to escape and found myself very depressed, tired and worn out. I found the Ferber book first, read it and tried the method. However, the intermittent reassurance only made my baby mad so I looked for more help. Thank God above, I found Dr. Weissbluth. As others have noted, his book gives scientific explanations in addition to advice and I found the personal testimonies very reassuring. I implemented his strategies immediately. His nighttime sleep improved quickly, but naps were more difficult. I stuck with it, however, and after 6 weeks of consistent training (and not much crying in retrospect), he was sleeping 10-12 hours a night and taking 2, 1-2 hour naps. This seemed nothing short of a miracle for my baby who previously took NO naps and slept intermittently at night. Baby #2)A girl born 1 1/2 years after her brother. She had her days and nights pretty mixed up so she slept great stretches during the day and screamed (and I mean screamed) all night. By eight weeks both my husband and I were completely fried. A story in the book was similar to ours so we started sleep training at eight weeks with the understanding that we would abandon it if she didn't improve quickly. Well, within 3 days she was sleeping 12 hours at night and taking 2-3 naps per day. Some nights she would sleep 14 hours a night. We were floored. Again, another 'miracle.' Baby #3)A boy. We started using the strategies early with this baby. By eight weeks he was sleeping 6 hour stretches at night with almost no crying. We were very in tune to his sleepy cues and tried to get him down for naps when he seemed tired. As Dr. Weissbluth notes, sometimes the naps work and sometimes they don't when they are only 6-8 weeks old, but being consistent can really help your child learn to sleep. Again, by 12 weeks, he was sleeping very well at nigth (12 hours) and taking 2 naps per day. Baby #4)A girl. I honestly don't remember any sleep issues with her (other than typical newborn crying jags and fussiness). We were very consistent with her, had her sleeping in her crib and made sure to stick to our routine. Yes she cried a little, but no long crying spells. Some days she couldn't be up for more than an hour at a time before needing another nap. She is now 5 and to this day she will say 'I need to go to bed now.' She knows when she needs sleep and she goes willingly. Even on Christmas Eve. Baby #5)A boy. He is almost three months and we have tried to 'train' him in fits and starts. It doesn't work. Consistency, patience and persistence are key. We are about to undertake sleep training again. We can see that he is getting overtired, irritable and unable to settle himself. Overall, this method works. Period. Again, it is not for everyone. If you prefer a

4 out of 4 people found this review helpful.

Mother of twins sees the light

THIS BOOK IS A MUST- I wish I would've read this sooner. I am a mother of 4 1/2 month old fraternal twins and read this book front to back in a week (a milestone with twins). Up until reading this, I assumed that no person and not one book could assist in getting my babies to sleep in the early evening and keeping them down all night. I was a frazzled woman- waiting for them to fall asleep when they pleased & accepting that whatever sleep they got was fine. They were getting about 12 hours of sleep in 24 hours and were going down for the night at 10:30/11pm. After reading this book, I was able to put them on a schedule (didn't think I could, with twins) and after 4 days they were sleeping at 6:30pm for 12 hours & 3 hours in the day for their naps. Ahhh...time with my husband and happier babies during the day.

3 out of 3 people found this review helpful.

A new parent's lifesaver!

My daughter swears by this book. She has used it as a resource for her first child who is now 3 and her second who is 5 months. My other daughter is having her first baby in November and I bought this as a gift for her. We have also given the book to numerous friends upon the birth of their first children.

2 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

Highly Recommended!

I have had this book since my son was 10 months old and not sleeping well. He is now 8. When we started this book, he was sleeping about 7-8hr and napping about and hour a day. By the time he was 11 months old, he was sleeping 14 hrs a night and taking 2, two hour naps a day! He was such a happy baby after we started this! It is totally my bible and goes clear through adolesence. I still reference it because as they grow so does different sleeping patterns.

2 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

Could Be Summarized in Twenty Pages

I think the author could have summarized this book in one chapter. The basic premise is, your child should be put down to sleep every two hours after waking. To get to that, you have to read through pages and pages of drawn-out text wherein the author insults children and parents who may be experiencing sleep problems, calling sleepless children brats and whatnot. Again, the book is okay and helpful on some level, but I wish it were much more comprehensive and less insulting.

2 out of 5 people found this review helpful.

It's 6pm and my 18 month old is down for the night

My title says it all. Since 6 months old, my daughter has slept 13 hours a night straight. As she gets older and needs less sleep, she shortens her naps...which is OK by me. Either it works for you or it doesn't......it saved my sanity...and every night is date night when my husband gets home!

2 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

Good Tips

I purchased this book after my daughter's sleep turned into a disaster area. She used to sleep well and then stopped all of a sudden, she began to wake all through the night and stop napping, i looked to this book for help and found some. It was not written as concisely as I would have liked and it took me a while to figure out what I should do to improve her sleep, the one big tip i picked up was earlier bedtimes, this seemed to be the problem and really did help. I would recommend this book along with Nanny Wisdom and Dr Ferber's book. After reading all three of these books I was able to decipher what to do next, how much sleep my daughter needed and how to actually do it.

2 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

Security Problems Later?

This is for the one reviewer that stated that letting your child cry for 40 minutes would later result in security problems. I did the hints with my first and second babies and granted, it didn't take them more than 40 minutes to fall asleep, but they learned. They are now 2 and 4 yrs. old and the best sleepers in the house! They're great with giving hugs and kisses and they have no security problems that I can see. I know that every child is different, but don't group all children and their parents into one category. In other words, it worked for me, but it didn't for you. And that's fine.

2 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

Save your money, save your child's trust

I read this book because my friend insisted I 'had to' and it was 'The Book'. I was horrified. The book tells you to let your poor baby scream and scream and scream. It tells you to go against every instinct naturally bestowed upon women (for a reason) and ignore your baby's only way to communicate, and eventually you'll be lucky enough that they just give up. That's not how I want to start a relationship with a baby. I want my baby to know he can trust me to be there for him. My son, by the way, is a great sleeper, still napping at age 4 and sleeping through the night. He wakes with a smile. My friend's kids? Well, she's still pulling out her hair 3 years later and constantly 're-training' them with the advice in this book.

2 out of 5 people found this review helpful.

One of my most used parenting books.

This book was recommended to me by another mom, and now I'm recommending it to you. The first few chapters talk about research that went into consideration when writing the book. Then there's chapters by age on problems that may arise within this age range. The end of the chapter summarizes the main points and gives an action plan for exhausted parents. This book is so helpful. I borrowed it from the library so many times that I just decided that I needed to buy it for myself.

1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

Highly Recommended

I found this book extremely helpful as a first time parent. My baby is an excellent night sleeper - slept for no less than 8 hours a night from her seventh day, however I have really struggled with day sleep since she turned 3 months old. This book was very informative and based on solid research. I trust the information and techniques talked about in the book and have already seen an improvement in my child's day sleeping patterns. She is now sleeping 12 hours at night and her temperament has returned to its joyful state of her early infancy. I fully intend to implement the day sleep schedule Dr. Weisbluth recommends for 5 month olds when she reaches that age.

1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

Great Book

This is a great book! It is helping a lot with my son!

1 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

I'm sure its a good book!

I had several friends recommend this book to me and I am sure it is a very good book, but unfortunately I have not had a chance to read the whole thing. I just wish there was a cliff notes version! I know sounds ridiculous. I love reading but with a new baby who is now 4 months old.....I have no spare time to get a 400 something page book read! So being a tired mom I have been a little overwhelmed and as I have read it I feel like I have just messed up already and need to just wait til my next child. I tried to implement some of the stuff I read but my baby is just not having it! Everyone who has read it that I know swears by it, but it just wasn't for me and I know it was because of bad timing!

1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

NOT appropriate for Adoptive families!!!

As an adoptive parent, I am appalled by the advice given in this book. The author insists that crying-it-out doesn't interfere with attachment. He never says anything specific about 'attachment in adoption' however, and makes no distinction between children who were adopted and biological children, and that alone is a huge red flag for me. All babies and children need to attach to their parents, and maybe letting your kid scream alone for an hour won't hurt a kid you gave birth to 'i have no idea, really' but he also advises this for adoptive parents, and that's just bad advice. In fact, adoption is only mentioned on 3 of the 457 pages of this book. It is almost completely anecdotal, too, and the advice given contradicts basic attachment recommendations for adoptive families. Example is cited below. There is one brief paragraph from the author, on page 428, ending with the sentence 'The following story illustrates how experienced parents were able to help their new child learn to sleep better, even though she hadn't slept well for nine months'. --Okay, how does HE know how the baby slept for the first 9 months prior to adoption??? The story goes on to say 'We arrived back home late that night....the next day we paid a visit to Dr. Weissbluth's office, and he advised us...put her down at 9am for a morning nap...if she cries, pick her up after an hour.' --AN HOUR, for a NEWLY ADOPTED 9 month old?!?! A later paragraph states 'I was convinced that she was missing her foster father and that she was grieving for everythign she had left behind in Guatemala....I mentioned my 'grieving' theory to Dr. Weissbluth, who politely discounted it. He said that when babies wake up in the middle of the night, they are in a twilight state between sleep and waking. They aren't likely to be grieving or doing much else.... he suggested putting her to bed earlier...she might still be overtired.' Again, this runs completely COUNTER to what we know of adopted children who CAN talk, for starters. And discounting grieving in a child who was attached to her foster family and had stranger anxiety and didn't know who these new strangers were??? --stranger anxiety was also mentioned earlier in the story. Later the parent writes 'Have these healthy sleep habits produced a happy child? You bet. 'she' is a joy to be around. As we've all gotten to know each other better she has become much more affectionate.' Does anyone else think maybe TIME GETTING TO KNOW EACH OTHER maybe was the huge factor there, since they were complete strangers at first? It's even possible, perhaps probable, that letting this poor little girl cry it out only prolonged attaching to her new family.

1 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

A must have for recovering attachment parents

If you are an exhausted parent who is finally out of denial about attachment parenting causing sleep issues and have accepted that it is not the only acceptable way to raise a child, this practical book is for you.

Best sleep book out there

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