Customer Reviews for

Perfection: A Memoir of Betrayal and Renewal

Average Rating 3.5
( 148 )
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(40)

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(33)

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(32)

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(29)

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(14)

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Most Helpful Favorable Review

13 out of 14 people found this review helpful.

Will take your breath away

Julie Metz has written a memoir that will take your breath away, from the initial, unexpected death of her husband to the postmortem revelation of his many affairs. Metz's style is both intimate and literary, elevating the central drama of her life to a meditation on th...
Julie Metz has written a memoir that will take your breath away, from the initial, unexpected death of her husband to the postmortem revelation of his many affairs. Metz's style is both intimate and literary, elevating the central drama of her life to a meditation on the nature of human need and fallibility. In exposing her own grief, rage, vulnerability and audacity, Metz allows us to connect deeply and emotionally with her story. Her need to understand what happened in her marriage leads her to confront the women in her dead husband's past, which ultimately gives her the opportunity to see herself more fully. In this powerful and empowering tale, raw grief and righteous anger finally give way to forgiveness, acceptance and new love.

posted by 1335933 on May 11, 2009

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Most Helpful Critical Review

10 out of 12 people found this review helpful.

Interesting At First...But Ultimately Boring!

When the story starts, one gets wrapped up in the emotion of losing a spouse and what a person goes through. I actually felt sorry for Julie at that point. But, mere WEEKS after the funeral, and BEFORE Julie finds out about her husband's infidelities, she starts acting...
When the story starts, one gets wrapped up in the emotion of losing a spouse and what a person goes through. I actually felt sorry for Julie at that point. But, mere WEEKS after the funeral, and BEFORE Julie finds out about her husband's infidelities, she starts acting like a dog in heat with the pursuit of sex as her main focus. I was disgusted as this continued throughout the book, until the end. I would not recommend this book unless you want to hear about Julie's sexual exploits which turn out to be very boring!

posted by EllesusaintGirl on July 29, 2009

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  • Anonymous

    Posted May 11, 2009

    Will take your breath away

    Julie Metz has written a memoir that will take your breath away, from the initial, unexpected death of her husband to the postmortem revelation of his many affairs. Metz's style is both intimate and literary, elevating the central drama of her life to a meditation on the nature of human need and fallibility. In exposing her own grief, rage, vulnerability and audacity, Metz allows us to connect deeply and emotionally with her story. Her need to understand what happened in her marriage leads her to confront the women in her dead husband's past, which ultimately gives her the opportunity to see herself more fully. In this powerful and empowering tale, raw grief and righteous anger finally give way to forgiveness, acceptance and new love.

    13 out of 14 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted July 29, 2009

    Interesting At First...But Ultimately Boring!

    When the story starts, one gets wrapped up in the emotion of losing a spouse and what a person goes through. I actually felt sorry for Julie at that point. But, mere WEEKS after the funeral, and BEFORE Julie finds out about her husband's infidelities, she starts acting like a dog in heat with the pursuit of sex as her main focus. I was disgusted as this continued throughout the book, until the end. I would not recommend this book unless you want to hear about Julie's sexual exploits which turn out to be very boring!

    10 out of 12 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Posted July 2, 2009

    Dissappointing

    I found this writer self absorbed and bitter. Unfortunately, many spouses cheat. The woman's responsibility is to her child and getting on with her life. Calling mistresses from 5 years ago and reading your dead husband's old e-mails only causes more pain and self torture. Join the crowd, Lady, and get over yourself!

    9 out of 23 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted August 1, 2009

    Perfection

    At first Perfection was an egrossing memoir, but after several chapters I found the author somewhat self-absorbed and then obsessed with the woman who had stolen her husband's affections. It was a relief to finish the book, especially since the author is now remarried and obviously very happy.

    5 out of 5 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted May 6, 2009

    Truth IS Stranger than Fiction

    It is impossible to put "Perfection" down. I initially browsed through it to decide if I would take it along on a trip and there I was five hours later, still turning the pages. Julie's honesty took my breath away. She tells ALL but it is done with great authenticity, courage and compassion. Perfection is a spiritual journey to find the truth in her life, in her marriage, in her friendships. It is authentic, heart-breaking and thought provoking. When you finish the book, you will never quite see the world the same way. You will question the surface of things. And hopefully you will buy two more copies for your closest friends.

    5 out of 6 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted October 28, 2011

    I Also Recommend:

    great

    I love reading such books. It widens your perspective. can only recommend

    4 out of 4 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted August 2, 2009

    Perfection

    This book was written beautifully.
    It was also very heartbreaking and didn't expect all the emotions that I was feeling. I would recommend it as a book club read also.

    4 out of 5 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted June 28, 2009

    A self-absorbed story

    I began this book with open-minded enthusiasm for one woman's journey but, two-thirds of the way through, I realized the author, hopefully, was (and not "is") one of those people who relishes being the victim and cannot take responsibility for themselves in the relationship. I found her recitations of her sexual partners to be tedious after the first two or three. Obviously an intelligent and gifted person with financial resources, I suddenly realized that it is not always the poor and uneducated who find themselves in this role.

    4 out of 5 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted August 29, 2009

    Bleh

    I did not find this writer's style to be at all compelling. Her voice was weak and rambling. Her images were awkward. While I thought I'd be into finding out how her story unfolded, I found myself utterly bored and disinterested in her.

    3 out of 3 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted August 8, 2009

    An enlightening look into a marriage

    If I had not known this was a true story I would have thought it was a good work of fiction. The story of this marriage and betrayal is sad, touching, and has a twist. How the widow handles her husband's indescretions is unique.

    I thought the book was well written and interesting.

    3 out of 3 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted June 26, 2009

    Great Read

    This was a wonderful book! I ordered it early and awaited it's arrival. I am glad that I did. The author did a great job reliving a troubled spot in her life, writing and recalling with dignity. I could not put this book down. I found myself quickly taking sides, yet trying to think about how I would feel in each person's shoes. I will read this again.

    3 out of 3 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted May 19, 2009

    more from this reviewer

    Loss and Betrayal

    Julie Metz first time novelist writes her memoir of her marriage to a man she is just getting to know after his death. Perfection opens with the last moments of Henry's life when the unthinkable becomes reality and at the age of 44 Julie becomes a widow, her daughter Liza who is just 6 loses her father and a 12 year, sometimes happy, sometimes tumultuous marriage comes to an end. Then the task of picking up the pieces begins. What was hidden for so long now comes to light and Julie finds out that Henry has been unfaithful. Every new discovery leads you deeper into their story. Perfection is a story of loss and of betrayal. But it is also a story of growth and finally hope. You never know how strong you are until you are put to the test and Julie does more than just survive, she learns how to live again.

    3 out of 4 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted April 24, 2010

    ...

    Although I did finish the book, it wasn't one of those books that I couldn't put down.

    2 out of 3 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted September 8, 2009

    I Also Recommend:

    Boring

    This is a true story which I usually enjoy. I felt the author is quite self-absorbed and seems to think highly of herself. She seems to have a different set of rules; one set for herself and one set for everyone else. Comes across as being a hypocrite. I had to struggle to get through this one.

    2 out of 4 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted August 9, 2009

    more from this reviewer

    Wow! What a story

    I'm sure this book was very therapeutic for the writer. I did not really need to know so much about her sex life, nor did I care to. However, the story waa well written, and almost unbelievable. I enjoyed 3/4 of the book and then it became a little repetitive the last quarter of the book. I wish the author well and glad to know she is happy and in a safe and healthy relationship Loaned this out to some friends. Some liked it, some did not.

    2 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted August 2, 2009

    Perfection

    It was not that interesting. It drug on too long.

    2 out of 6 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted August 2, 2009

    Understanding the "why" of betrayal

    I enjoyed Julie Metz's book very much. I was absorbed in her journey of understanding why her husband had cheated through her marriage and her acceptance of the great mystery of the "why" anyone does what they do.

    When Julie learns of her husband's perfidy, she experiences exactly what those of who have experienced something similar -- great rage, anger and confusion. Learning to forgive and accept what happened is truly a journey, and I enjoyed how Julie completed hers. I was especially intrigued by her research into the reasons for infidelity and that the answer is people make choices and that often these choices have terrible consequences to others.

    I recommend this book for anyone who is struggling with understanding his/her spouse's infidelity and how to gain acceptance of this. Great read.

    2 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted August 1, 2009

    more from this reviewer

    Rings true for those of us who have been there...

    SPOILER ALERT: I do reveal the secret! Perfection is the author's descent discovery of her husband's adultery and betrayal. She captures with perfection the myriad of emotions and thoughts I know I experienced. This book helped me process, and I cannot recommend it more highly.

    2 out of 4 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted July 1, 2009

    more from this reviewer

    I Also Recommend:

    Perfection in the memoir

    Julie Metz found herself in a position that any woman who loves and trusts her husband could find herself in. She had herself neatly tucked inside a comfortable bubble which bursts none too soon when her 40ish husband simply drops dead in front of her. He leaves her a mess of emotional garbage (not to mention incriminating emails) to deal with. Handfulls of affairs and humiliating behavior and everyone knew. Everyone but the wife. A fascinating read & real juicy, too!

    2 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted June 22, 2009

    Men are less than perfect

    Women will cheer for Julie as she overcomes the initial grief of losing her husband and again when she has to cope with the discovery of her husband's betrayal during their marriage. She tells the story with such touching detail. Some of it is almost hard to believe but that's what makes it so hard to put down. I would have preferred she not make her political comments though. Some of her readers will feel alienated if they don't lean to the left like she does.

    2 out of 3 people found this review helpful.

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