Customer Reviews for

Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands

Average Rating 3.5
( 141 )
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(73)

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(11)

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(28)

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Most Helpful Favorable Review

11 out of 12 people found this review helpful.

LOVED the book..

Now..I can understand why some of the reviews were poor. Dr. Laura definately does not have any good things to say about the feminist movement. At times it does sound as if she thinks women should only be housewives and take care of their husbands. But! If you can look ...
Now..I can understand why some of the reviews were poor. Dr. Laura definately does not have any good things to say about the feminist movement. At times it does sound as if she thinks women should only be housewives and take care of their husbands. But! If you can look past that, there are great things about this book and things ANY wife can learn whether she chooses to stay home or have a career. It's all about respect, being equals, and taking care of your self and your family. I think everyone should read this book no matter your opinion on the role of a wife. Also, a quick note about some of the reviews I had read. She does also have books just for men, she isn't only 'attacking' women and leaving the men clear of any faults. Remember, this book was titled The Proper Care and Feeding of HUSBANDS, so don't expect to have any advice for the guys in this one. Now, the ONLY thing I didn't like about this book was that in one of the chapters she makes it sound like women are ALWAYS at fault when a man cheats. I absolutely do not believe that to be true. Overall though, i would suggest this book to my friends and family....and have.

posted by Anonymous on July 28, 2008

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Most Helpful Critical Review

16 out of 23 people found this review helpful.

Give me a break

What a load of crap. I'm from the South - we feed our husbands. It's expected and most us enjoy it. In our modern world, I also don't know a single woman that doesn't like sex. Do I cook every single meal my husband eats and do it freshly showered and primped every ...
What a load of crap. I'm from the South - we feed our husbands. It's expected and most us enjoy it. In our modern world, I also don't know a single woman that doesn't like sex. Do I cook every single meal my husband eats and do it freshly showered and primped every day? Of course not. Nor do I cook every single day.

Let me share a couple of true stories with you. I have known 2 older women that pretty much lived what this book describes - and then became ill. One husband moved out of the house when his wife was diagnosed with breast cancer. He couldn't deal with his wife being ill. His minister ok'ed this because it's "so hard to see the family nurturer in that condition", instead of telling him to get his sorry butt back home and do for his wife what she had always done for him. Another shipped his dying wife off to their daughter and asked another woman from church to marry him a month after his wife died.

Two for two.. I see a pattern emerging ladies and gentlemen. Do i think these just happened to be bad men? No, I don't. I think they were put first for so long, and that their wives sacrificed showing themselves as human, that these men couldn't fathom that their wives now needed them. They lacked the life skills to deal with such an unpleasant situation. You know, the same skills we try to teach our children as they mature? Do i think all men would do this? Of course not, but this is a problem.

No man wants to be married to a controlling and hateful woman, any more than a woman wants a man like that. I don't belittle or bash my husband and I try to make him happy, but I'm human and not perfect. Sometimes I'm grouchy, lazy, or unattractive. And guess what sometimes so is he. I love and accept him in those times too - that's life and marriage, and it's no worse for me to have those days than for him to.

Then she talks like women should thank their lucky stars that a man would even look at her if she's in her 30's or has kids. Give me a break. I was in my 30's with two sons when I met my husband (1st died). He was not the only man interested in me, but we loved each other and I think we BOTH chose well. I don't get down on my knees and thank him for marrying me. I guess I'm just not as thankful as the wife in the book that realized she was wothless without her husband (gag).

I want to make my husband happy, but I am not a wife-in-the-box. If I've been working in the garden, cleaning house, and doing laundry all day then I'm not going to look like a prom queen while making dinner when he gets home... and he *should* get to see that I also work hard for the life we enjoy and that this is a partnership... and you know what? He does.

What do I agree with in this book? 1st, husband's need a little alone time when they get home. Give him that time to decompress without asking about his day or telling him about yours or a problem. He will come to you in 30-45 minutes and be ready to talk. 2nd, don't ask your husband to do something and then complain about it. Jeez... this makes me want to smack women in the head. Your way isn't the only way and your husband isn't there to play a supporting role in *your* life... he'd probably like to live one too. If your way is the only right way then do it yourself.

Happily married for 12 years to a man that would be bored in 5 minutes with the woman descibed in this book.

posted by Anonymous on June 22, 2012

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  • Anonymous

    Posted March 1, 2004

    Truth, bias, and exaggeration delivered with a baseball bat.

    I agree with Dr. Laura¿s overall concept about men, and the role that women play in their lives. Unlike most authors, Dr. Laura keeps my interest on every page. She gets straight to the point, and uses just enough supporting examples to demonstrate her point without boring the reader. However, I get the impression that she has allowed her contempt for the feminist movement to set the tone at the expense of her devoted listeners and readers, most of whom are probably not feminists. While she does point out the significance and power of wives and mothers, she also paints a really nasty picture of women in general, spiking the text with cutting words such as bi*chy, egotistic, evil, cruel, controlling, dictating, ¿I can go on. On page five she even includes a quote from a male listener who used the `B¿ word twice, as well as the `S¿ word. He didn¿t say anything particularly profound, so what was the purpose? While I do know some women who fit the profile that she describes, I think that most mature women have learned to manage their emotional ups and downs, and most mature men have the understanding and back-bone to deal with the fact that women are human, too, and will occasionally say and do the wrong thing. I also find that she mothers and protects the men a little too much. Yes, they have feelings too, but most of them also have a spine. On page 42, a husband who works 13 hours a day is standing by the sink with tears running down his face because his wife (who speaks in all uppercase) is dissatisfied with the way he does the dishes. Is the wife the only on who needs a lecture here? My husband would have cherished the opportunity to debate me on the issue! He would have stared me down, and yes, he would have dug up ten years of history support his argument. While men and women are certainly different, they both come in all shapes, sizes, and colors, and so it is with their personalities and temperaments. Actually, it is my husband who is never satisfied with the way I load the dish washer, and he is the one who expects me to read his mind. I think she¿s right when she says that women are over-committed outside of the home, but I don¿t agree that it¿s necessarily because they are inconsiderate or selfish. As an outreach committee chair person (and a woman), I find that it is mostly women who respond to community service projects, and many of them are working wives and mothers. When they have a scheduling conflict they explain and apologize profusely, although no one else is making a big deal of it. I think we just tend to feel responsible to the community. Another reason may be that we receive more positive feedback outside of the home, as husbands are capable of taking their wives for granted - a flaw that Dr. Laura only attributes to women. As a final point I¿d like to point out that Dr. Laura shows considerably more concern for the needs of men than of women. On page 105, going to work is a legitimate way for a man to show his love, even though he would be doing it if he were single, because he wouldn¿t do it with the same degree of commitment, intent, sacrifice, and depth of passion that he has when he¿s doing it for his woman and children. However, on page 149, doing the laundry, cooking dinner, and taking care of the kids is not adequate compensation for his work, because they¿re things she¿d be doing anyway, and those acts are not specifically and personally directed to her man. Would it be unreasonable to say that both husbands and wives like to receive a little special treatment once in a while? I think if Dr. Laura had written this book with a little more consideration for women¿s feelings, the women who need it most would be more likely to read it to the end.

    1 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted January 26, 2004

    What Do Men Want?

    This is a strange book--a woman's diatribe about what men really want, when, as any married woman knows, what men want is not so neat and predictable. Taken at face value, it's insulting to women, but there's almost a hint of parody involved--are women really going to listen to sexed-up Betty Crocker advice. If you want to know what men are thinking, try: 'I SLEEP AT RED LIGHTS: A TRUE STORY OF LIFE AFTER TRIPLETS,' by Bruce Stockler, a wonderful, wise and compassionate book about marriage and parenthood. And also, 'This Boy's Life,' by Tobias Wolf, 'Morning, Noon & Night,' by Spalding Gray--a little weirder, tho.

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