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Real Sex Does Not Come from a Website

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  • Posted February 25, 2011

    more from this reviewer

    A fascinating text exploring the sensitive nature of pornographic addictions.

    Andrew Fox's Real Sex Does Not Come from a Website: The Rewards of Pursuing Your Wife is a fascinating text exploring the sensitive nature of pornographic addictions. He contrasts this dysfunctional behavior with the satisfaction of directing one's attention and energy to a spouse. Fox is candid and straightforward; delivering in-your-face wisdom aimed at establishing and nurturing real relationships. The book promotes understanding the needs and wants of both men and women, and is an excellent resource for all.

    Real Sex Does Not Come from a Website is divided into four main parts, plus an appendix. Each of the section titles is witty and eye-catching-for example, "The 40-Year-Old Virgin," "Catch me if you can," and "When Harry Met Sally."

    Fox emphasizes the bottom line: pornography has become so rampant in society that it is ingrained in our culture. Whether it's due to a fear of rejection or any other reason, "Porn has become the alternative outlet for us." What begins as a release outlet, when compounded enough, gives birth to a false virtual reality "when in our own bed is the real reality waiting for a man [or woman] to capture and satisfy."

    The book essentially explains the basics of male sexuality and how to prepare for a physically and emotionally satisfying sexual experience. More importantly, the text provides strategies to help the individual train his/her mind to be attentive to his/her spouse.

    Ultimately, there is an underlying aura of one's sexual spirituality beneath the pleasure and sense of gratification. Fox states, "Part of our makeup is spiritual and unlike our anatomy, this spirituality is a process of formation." In other words, trust in one's spouse and let sexual experiences be also learning experiences. Partaking in pornography represents human weakness and a superficial contentment that will inevitably cease and be replaced by guilt-whereas engaging in sexual intimacy with one's spouse will only lead to growth in the relationship.

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