Customer Reviews for

Relationship Rescue: A Seven-Step Strategy for Reconnecting with Your Partner

Average Rating 4
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(35)

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Most Helpful Favorable Review

6 out of 6 people found this review helpful.

Creating, Improving, and Rescuing Your Relationships

Relationship Rescue is my pick as the top book of 2000. This book deserves many more than five stars. It is as close as you can get to having a hands-on guide to improving your relationships as you can get without having a trained counselor present. It's too ba...
Relationship Rescue is my pick as the top book of 2000. This book deserves many more than five stars. It is as close as you can get to having a hands-on guide to improving your relationships as you can get without having a trained counselor present. It's too bad that most people will take on this book because they have a bad or failing relationship. It would be much better to start with this approach in the beginning. I hope marriage advisors, parents, living together couples, and engaged people will become familiar with this book and recommend it to others. The book is extremely direct. The author makes it clear that you have to first change yourself before you can change you relationship. The book is extremely well structured for easy use both as a book and as a workbook. It is divided into seven steps (define and diagnose where the relationship is now; get rid of your wrong thinking about relationships; find out what you are doing to hurt the relationships; internalize the values needed to build and maintain strong relationships; the necessary format for a strong relationship; and how to reconnect and manage the relationship). Each section is filled with diagnostic questions for you and your partner to use, as well as directions for implementing what you learn. The process involved is a good one. It begins with identifying stalled thinking, works on stallbusting that thinking, and then builds new habits that will work better. The steps are extensive, but you can take them in bite-sized amounts. Before you are done, you will be sharing what you have done with your partner. I have to believe that anyone who was told that their partner had been working on these questions and exercises would be very impressed by the commitment to the relationship that this effort represented. It can help overcome a lot of thoughtlessness that may have preceded that sharing. If your relationship is on the rocks, that idea of reconnecting can be scary. I was impressed to see that the book provides a 14 day program to help you with exercises that help reconnect you emotionally, intellectually, and spiritually. Most counselors would probably not give you this much guidance. You can improve the benefits you will find here by also using the excellent workbook that is sold separately. It contains many more questions and a convenient place to write them down. You can read my review of that as well, if you like. One of the finest things in life is to have a great relationship with other people. This book gives you the necessary background to move in that direction. The rest is up to you, as the author says. Give it a shot! You have a great quality of life to win! Donald Mitchell, co-author of The Irresistible Growth Enterprise and The 2,000 Percent Solution

posted by Anonymous on March 31, 2001

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Most Helpful Critical Review

4 out of 6 people found this review helpful.

Oprah likes him, but he didn't help me

I gave this book a try. But, like so many books on relationships, this book with its 'ten relationship values' is oversimplified. Once my husband (17 years) fell madly in love with someone at work, no book would have salvaged the situation. I am not playing victim o...
I gave this book a try. But, like so many books on relationships, this book with its 'ten relationship values' is oversimplified. Once my husband (17 years) fell madly in love with someone at work, no book would have salvaged the situation. I am not playing victim or showing 'learned helplessness'. My ex husband had decided to leave us, period, whether I read some book or not. In summary I feel McGraw is way too optimistic believing that every relationship can be salvaged. Rather than 'Relationship Rescue', the book should be titled 'Relationship Values' and given to new couples, so that you build a strong relationship in the first place. Dr Phil refers to his grandparents' 55 year marriage and that's heartwarming, but it just isn't possible for everyone.

posted by Anonymous on July 21, 2006

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  • Anonymous

    Posted March 31, 2001

    Creating, Improving, and Rescuing Your Relationships

    Relationship Rescue is my pick as the top book of 2000. This book deserves many more than five stars. It is as close as you can get to having a hands-on guide to improving your relationships as you can get without having a trained counselor present. It's too bad that most people will take on this book because they have a bad or failing relationship. It would be much better to start with this approach in the beginning. I hope marriage advisors, parents, living together couples, and engaged people will become familiar with this book and recommend it to others. The book is extremely direct. The author makes it clear that you have to first change yourself before you can change you relationship. The book is extremely well structured for easy use both as a book and as a workbook. It is divided into seven steps (define and diagnose where the relationship is now; get rid of your wrong thinking about relationships; find out what you are doing to hurt the relationships; internalize the values needed to build and maintain strong relationships; the necessary format for a strong relationship; and how to reconnect and manage the relationship). Each section is filled with diagnostic questions for you and your partner to use, as well as directions for implementing what you learn. The process involved is a good one. It begins with identifying stalled thinking, works on stallbusting that thinking, and then builds new habits that will work better. The steps are extensive, but you can take them in bite-sized amounts. Before you are done, you will be sharing what you have done with your partner. I have to believe that anyone who was told that their partner had been working on these questions and exercises would be very impressed by the commitment to the relationship that this effort represented. It can help overcome a lot of thoughtlessness that may have preceded that sharing. If your relationship is on the rocks, that idea of reconnecting can be scary. I was impressed to see that the book provides a 14 day program to help you with exercises that help reconnect you emotionally, intellectually, and spiritually. Most counselors would probably not give you this much guidance. You can improve the benefits you will find here by also using the excellent workbook that is sold separately. It contains many more questions and a convenient place to write them down. You can read my review of that as well, if you like. One of the finest things in life is to have a great relationship with other people. This book gives you the necessary background to move in that direction. The rest is up to you, as the author says. Give it a shot! You have a great quality of life to win! Donald Mitchell, co-author of The Irresistible Growth Enterprise and The 2,000 Percent Solution

    6 out of 6 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted July 21, 2006

    Oprah likes him, but he didn't help me

    I gave this book a try. But, like so many books on relationships, this book with its 'ten relationship values' is oversimplified. Once my husband (17 years) fell madly in love with someone at work, no book would have salvaged the situation. I am not playing victim or showing 'learned helplessness'. My ex husband had decided to leave us, period, whether I read some book or not. In summary I feel McGraw is way too optimistic believing that every relationship can be salvaged. Rather than 'Relationship Rescue', the book should be titled 'Relationship Values' and given to new couples, so that you build a strong relationship in the first place. Dr Phil refers to his grandparents' 55 year marriage and that's heartwarming, but it just isn't possible for everyone.

    4 out of 6 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted July 19, 2000

    One of the books that can change life for the better

    Practical, common-sense advice, engagingly written. This is one of a handful of books that I think can change anyone's life for the better. This one is easier reading than the others, but not particularly lightweight like so many out there that you can't suggest it to 'smart' friends who can benefit from it.

    2 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Posted November 15, 2009

    more from this reviewer

    Relationship Help

    This book was used as a text in a relationship class. It was very insightful and an easy read. Most people will find it helpful in the search to enhance your awareness of what a relationship is.

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted February 4, 2006

    CHANGING

    Dr. Phil is up front and straight out. No small talk. He gets straingt to the point and has excellent teqniques for rejuvinating anybody's relationship.

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted September 28, 2005

    Nice work...

    Good tool that helps understand that relationship problems go way beyond specific symptoms and have a deeper component. Nice way to start the process of figuring out how to have happier relationships.

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted January 29, 2004

    Just what I needed!

    I was having a world of problems in my marriage and I did not know where to look. After being inspired by some of the things Dr. Phil says on TV, I decided to read this book. Boy am I glad I did! Dr. Phil has this ability to take it right to you and this is what I needed at the time. His words punched right through my walls of denial and forced me to make a real objective re-evaluation of myself and my relationship. It did wonders for me. After having this rejuvenating experience, I decided to explore and learn more about relationships and personal development. I have now found a more advanced book on relationships and personal development that is absolutely excellent! It is called 'The Ever-Transcending Spirit' by Toru Sato. It is more theoretical but an excellent read if you are one of those people who 'gets it!' It has taken me one step closer to inner peace and happiness.

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted September 13, 2003

    Great book on Relationships

    We all have the tendency to try to blame others and change other people when they don't like something about their relationships. In this book, Dr. Phil convincingly shows us that we need to first change ourselves if we want to improve on our relationships. He explains how our relationships are truly a reflection of who we are inside and guides us through a step by step procedure to change ourselves (and consequently, our relationships) for the better. Another book that provides an even deeper understanding of relationships without getting into expert terminology is Dr. Toru Sato's 'The Ever-Transcending Spirit'. It is already a bestseller among my circle of relationship counselors and I'm sure it will be for anyone interesting in improving their relationships.

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted August 12, 2002

    GREAT BOOK

    I COULDN'T PUT IT DOWN. I CRIED. I THOUGHT. I REALIZED THAT MY RELATIONSHIP COULD WORK WITH A LOT OF POSITIVE THINKING. THANKS DR PHIL.

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted August 8, 2000

    Excellent

    He tells it like it is and pulls no punches. Read this book only if you can handle the truth.

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted June 26, 2000

    Becky Whetstone says: BUY THE BOOK!!

    Rescuing dying relationships takes hard work, and MacGraw offers A WHOLE NEW WAY of looking at problem-solving. If you feel you've tried the usual way of solving marital discord and it hasn't worked, look into this book. It MAY be just what you need to save your relationship. Also, it offers great insight into how to keep your relationship tuned and in good condition. I say - go for it!

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted May 3, 2013

    Wow

    Real useful information with concrete action steps.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted October 12, 2012

    it's a workbook

    it would be nice to know that theres tons of pages where you are supposed to answer questions, reflect, etc before you purchase this where you cant write on it....very aggrivating

    0 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted May 9, 2010

    I Also Recommend:

    I also recommend Sugar's "The Silent Crisis Destroying America's Brightest Minds"

    One day these two crusaders will meet and sparks will fly.

    0 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted February 22, 2004

    Values in relationships

    Any relationship can be hit by saboteurs that cause senseless damage to fragile marriages, and, like an emotional root canal, to replace them with values will provide positive results. Dr. Phil's strategy leads us on a precise journey to uncover our heart and then share it with our partner as part of taking the 'risk of intimacy.' A good read indeed, just like the 'The Power of Positive Habits' by Dan Robey, which teaches us how to 'Improve Our Relationships' Automatically.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted January 10, 2003

    Excellent "how to" book

    If you want to improve on yourself and your relationship, this is an absolutely excellent book that tells you how to think and what to do step by step. It isn't easy but if you truly understand what Dr. Phil is saying and go through with it, your relationship will improve. If you want to have a deeper understanding of relationships and what it truly means to love, I'd also recommend Rhythm, Relationships, and Transcendence by Toru Sato

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  • Anonymous

    Posted July 10, 2001

    A GREAT RELATIONSHIP REVISOR

    DR. PHIL HAS A GREAT TELL IT LIKE IT IS WAY. HE REALLY MAKES YOU STOP AND THINK NOT ONLY A ONE-SIDED STORY. I WOULD RECOMMEND ALL COUPLES EVEN THE ONES JUST STARTING OUT TO READ THIS BOOK.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted July 18, 2001

    Food for Thought....

    Dr.Phil is the most refreshing voice in therapy that has come along in a great while. Not for the whiney or squeamish! Get ready to face the biggest fear you have...YOURSELF!

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  • Anonymous

    Posted May 25, 2001

    One of the best!

    Mr. McGraw has the ability to get to the root of many relationship problems and give common-sense solutions. This book is like a slap upside the head to where you are saying: 'Ahhh, so that's why.' For a possible solution to your problem, read this book. Perry Rose, author of I Love You...Will You Marry Me?! & Women, Sex And Dating, For The Single Man.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted April 7, 2001

    Positive and encouraging

    Dr.McGraw's book affirms the struggle in relationships and gives a helpful guide. Diagnosing is a tough early challenge; then applying the formula for health follows. Hard work, worthwhile change, then the prospect for relationship growth ahead.

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