Customer Reviews for

Surviving Infidelity: Making Decisions, Recovering from the Pain

Average Rating 3.5
( 16 )
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  • Anonymous

    Posted January 23, 2010

    This capture's the situation correctly!

    Unfortunately, right in front of me, my spouse was having an emotional infidelity. Sure, as she says, it was only a carpool, they talk about everything and have "fun". A carpool, then help me understand why would you be constantly on the phone or texting, sometimes as many as 45 times a day, back and forth including your days off, if it's only a carpool? Spending 8 hours a day together at work and then 2 hours a day together in a carpool; is that normal? Wow, was I fooled. Sure, she's says that in his words "he's in a miserable marriage". Well, as a superior or even as a direct supervisor, then your only recommendation is to seek professional help, not be their friend. So, that's how she described the situation, "I let a friendship go too far". No, that's not friendship, that's called Emotional Infidelity!

    This book explains it perfectly. It begins at the very basics, right where it all starts. It even answers the issues that were thrown at me by my spouse. We didn't resolve all our issues when we would disagree. Yes, the book addresses that too. Many times what seemed important at the moment, really just wasn't and many things are left unresolved because they truly are unimportant. People need to recognize and understand the word "respect".

    The book even talks about that old adage, "we really are opposite", when being used as an excuse for wanting to dissolve a marriage. Sure, everyone is opposite. Even if you married the little boy or girl that was you neighbor from infancy, yep, you're still opposite; no difference if you married someone from across the "railroad" track. Inherently, the two sexes are opposite, so stop using that as an excuse.

    This book really helped me, highlighted everything I was seeing and dealing with. Sadly, the one who made a conscious decision to get hooked by someone who was living in a state of misery, allowed herself to talk herself out of her own marriage. The carpool was nothing short of "misery loves company".

    This book is the only one I read that pulls it all together. Unfortunately, I was the only one in the marriage that read it, the one person actually involved in the emotional infidelity refused to accept and read it. Just think, if there was only a way to change the old adage, "you can lead a horse to water, but you can't force it to drink"; things might be different.

    2 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted March 20, 2007

    Less Psychology would be better...

    After recently dicovering my husband's affair, and finding out we are pregnant, I am desperate to find ANYTHING to help with the pain and hurt that I am feeling. This book was hard to stay focused on, and I felt a little better after reading it, but all in all, not too much. It recognizes a lot of psychological problems that 'cheaters' have, and makes very good points, but if you are looking for something to help you cope, try below titles.

    2 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted March 5, 2008

    A reviewer

    Sorry to the authors but I think most of the book is a waste. If your problem is internet cheating you might like it, but otherwise...keep looking, I am.

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted November 21, 2008

    more from this reviewer

    Helpful title on surviving infidelity

    ¿I¿ve been unfaithful.¿ With this sentence, most marriages will never be the same again, if they survive at all. Authors Rona B. Subotnik and Gloria G. Harris pledge to provide counsel to those who are hurt and reeling. getAbstract believes this book fulfills their promise. The authors thoroughly explore types of affairs; teach you how to cope with your pain, grief and anger; and advise you how to decide if you want the marriage to continue. Then they offer compassionate guidance on how to repair your relationship. With the knowledge drawn from their clinical practices, they also show you how to heal your wounds and emerge as a stronger, better person. If you¿re struggling to pick up the pieces of your life, your marriage and your heart, this book can help.

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    Posted May 19, 2011

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