The Gentle Art of Verbal Self-Defense: Revised and Updated (Fall River Press Edition)

The Gentle Art of Verbal Self-Defense

I purchased this book as a present for my Daughter. Her work environmnet is fairly rough, and I felt she might benefit from reading this book. In her "Financial Institutes" work place who ever can through someone out first is the winner. I believe this book helped her to menage these "barracudas" in a very appropriate way, not reciprocating in kind. She was and is more able to take the high road, without loosing her position. It should be available to all employees at every work place.

Speak 'Inspiration to all '

Speak is an inspiration to woman who are stuck in sticky situations where they can't figure it out themselves and need the guidance from some one who has already experianced it.I enjoyed evey moment of suspence and day of her triump to let her secert go. The pain she felt was very emotional because you could feel as if you were right there in her position trying to figure out what to do and if you do it what would happen. In the middle of the book it starts to take a turn where she finally relizes that she has more to live for and that if she keeps this secret bottled up inside then she'll always have the guilty conscience of not telling anyone what happened the night of the party.

This helped me a lot.

I have spent all my life defenseless against verbal attacks; not one to attack others, I was always caught by surprise by an unkind remark. I just never had the mentality to prepare to defend myself. Reading this book has changed my life. I learned that it is okay to defend myself against snide comments (previously believing that to do so was ungraceful and coarse) that left me feeling sad, weak, and unsure of myself. While it will take me a while to learn all the techniques, I am encouraged that I no longer have to laugh off veiled 'jokes' made at my expense, or wish later that I had a more appropriate response to a negative comment.

Truely Interesting!

this is a fascinating book with terrific details for both men and women. This book does not only tell you how to defend yourself, but also why people say the things they do. With many specific examples for the work place, at home, in public or with a group, followed by the right and wrong responses, this book could not be more straight forward. Because this book was written by a professional, it has many psycholinguist tips that are sure to help you grasp the full intent of a single sentence including it's hidden meanings . I recomend this book for anybody who finds the subject interesting.

There is a reason this book has sold several million copies

While I prefer _You Can't Say That to Me_ as a basic Elgin primer, there is a reason why this book has sold several million copies and why almost anyone doing counselling has a copy. If you are dealing with the normal types of verbal abuse, with the standard patterns of baiting, or with the other conflicts that most people deal with, this book is right on point. Now, if you are the cause of your own problems, if you refuse to work on solutions (the book sets out how to work on solutions, with drills and concepts and practice and such), or if you are dealing with out and out advanced sadists, this isn't the book for you. But if you want to deal with 95% of the human experience as it relates to verbal violence in every day life, you need this book.

I'm sending this book back :(

I received this book yesterday, and I eagerly grabbed and peeked through it hoping it would be a good read. I bought this book because I have been finding lately that certain people were baiting me into arguing with them and I didn't realise what they were up to until it was too late. 'The Gentle Art of Verbal Self-Defense' sounded like the perfect solution to this. Unfortunately this book doesn't live up to the 'reviews' and promo on these pages. It seems to be targeted to certain people/backgrounds instead of the general public, and while on the surface the areas covered appeared to be very broad-spectrum they are not. Many books that are 20 years old (or older!) contain a lot of fabulous information, but this one is outdated and useless. It's clumsy to read (you find yourself trying to translate the strange, perhaps outdated, metaphors used) and the sections aren't clear-cut. Personally I could only see using the so-called hints and tips on certain people, not in everyday life. I wish I didn't have to, and with all due respect to the author (who I am sure is a wonderful and talented person) but I'm sending this book back. It's just not what I expected or was lead to believe it would be.

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