101 Uses for a Bridesmaid Dressby Cindy Walker
101 Uses for a Bridesmaid Dress, tongue/em>/em>
Bridesmaid dresses -- what are they good for? We've got to pay for them, wear them, and then find a spot for them in the back of the closet. Our best women friends, suddenly transformed into tasteful-white-dress-wearing brides, tell us, "You'll be able to wear this bridesmaid dress again." But we know better.
101 Uses for a Bridesmaid Dress, tongue firmly in cheek, pokes fun at the hopelessly horrible dress that a bride asks her "court" to don. These whimsical illustrations and silly suggestions, from cocktail napkins and shower curtains, to pony blankets and frilly jock straps, are a hilarious antidote to the bridesmaid dresses we'll never wear again.
- HarperCollins Publishers
- Publication date:
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- NOOK Book
- File size:
- 9 MB
Read an Excerpt
We've all got bridesmaid horror stories: The dress with ruffles that added ten pounds, the $300 silk sheath in hot pink, the plunging back (perfect for winter months and pale, less-than-perfect skin), and everyone's favorite, the southern belle theme. While most of the dresses wind up hanging in the far reaches of crowded closets or bunched in old suitcases, I heard about one woman who actually dug a hole in her backyard and buried her burnt orange number. Another, who endured pink polyester during the summer, cut her dress into squares and used them to polish her car. We relate the tales with glee: Being a part of the inner circle at a close friend's wedding can be fun, but as part of postwedding etiquette we must mock the dresses.
Someplace between laughing at them and conducting burials come the ideas in this book. Ridiculous and not very practical, these suggestions are an antidote for situations like Cathy's, the woman who was made to wear the above-mentioned orange dress during a bridesmaid's worst nightmare: the Christmas wedding of a distant friend, featuring nine attendants in various hues of the rainbow and dresses with three ruffles across the bottom of each. To make matters worse, she was the only one not tanned from the California sun.
It's clear why Cathy had to put this dress five feet under. Still, you can get pretty silly trying to imagine just what else she might have done with it. For the last few months, in fact, it's all I've thought about. On the hacks Of envelopes, on napkins, in the margins of magazines, I've been collecting ideas. "Don't bury those dresses!" I cried out in encouragement to myself,muttering, "Martha Stewart, eat your heart out," as the list grew longer and longer, wackier and wilder. I felt certain that Martha would approve of the yellow silk bedroom slippers and lime-green cocktail napkins. 101 Uses was on its way.
I hope it brings you as much pleasure as every bride feels when she's surrounded by her friends in pink tulle. I couldn't help but giggle when I came across an old bridesmaid dress in my closet recently and, with this book in mind, got out the scissors. The top of the dress became a festive halter, and the bottom . . . a pretty blanket for my stallion, Handsome. I'll wear the halter just for laughs as he and I ride the hills of my family's Virginia farm. After all, I've got plenty more to play with.
Meet the Author
Cindy Walker is a model, actress, and accomplished equestrian. She lives in New Jersey with her Mr. Right.
Donna Mehalko has done illustrations for Revlon, Henri Bendel, and Tiffany, and her work has appeared in many women's magazines. She lives with her husband and their son in Manhattan.
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews
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This book was ok, but not what I expected. I probably won't give it to my bridesmaids afterall, which was my initial intent in buying one to test read. I wasn't at all insulted about the 'mocking' of the attire as some readers; it just seemed to lack creativity. Although, I do think I'll make my dog a new pillow bed from an old bridesmaid dress in the closet.
It doesn't take a genious to know that all Brides are not Dress Designers. So, unless you are, don't pass up this book. Buy it and give it to your Bridesmaids like I did. They're your lifelong pals and don't need you thinking that you know you've had them buy something that they'll love forever.
I thought this book was a perfect gift for my bridesmaids. I know that most have already been in a few weddings, and I think my choice of a bridesmaid dress is very beautiful, but if they have a different opinions- they now have options for destruction! I think this is a hysterical book!
I got married last year and I think this book makes a disturbing joke about an important issue...I dressed my wedding party in burgundy satin gowns and 3 out of 4 have worn them at least once again...I wouldn't ask my friends to shell out money for something they would never wear again...this book asssumes that all dresses are ugly and makes the people who have to wear them(the wedding party, who ARE important) feel silly and ridiculous.
not a fan of this book, some parts were funny, but not worth the purchase price.