The Act of Marriage: The Beauty of Sexual Love

The Act of Marriage: The Beauty of Sexual Love

3.7 17
by Tim LaHaye, Beverly LaHaye
     
 

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This updated and expanded edition gives a fresh informative edge to an already definitive book. New sections discuss "sex after sixty" and five reasons why God created sex, all supported by the very latest findings in the fields of medicine and sociology. For engaged couples and newlyweds who want to make lovemaking a joy from the start . . . For couples who have been

Overview

This updated and expanded edition gives a fresh informative edge to an already definitive book. New sections discuss "sex after sixty" and five reasons why God created sex, all supported by the very latest findings in the fields of medicine and sociology. For engaged couples and newlyweds who want to make lovemaking a joy from the start . . . For couples who have been married for years and want to maintain the flame or rekindle the embers . . . for every husband or wife who wants to be a better lover -- here are the insights into each other's bodies, psychosexual makeup, and need for tender, unselfish affection that can help you achieve your goal. With over 2.5 million copies in print, The Act of Marriage has helped thousands of Christian couples maximize their joy in sexual union and saved countless marriages. Pastors, doctors, and psychologists alike have endorsed the frank, practical insights.

Editorial Reviews

Publishers Weekly - Publisher's Weekly
Stress, aging and illness can contribute to a flagging sexual relationship for men and women after age 40. But the LaHayes, whose 1976 2.5-million-copy bestseller, The Act of Marriage, made it more permissible for evangelical Christians to discuss sex openly, say that combining the correct frame of mind with a few basic techniques can make the middle to golden years the richest and most sexually fulfilling. The husband-and-wife team (writing with Mike Yorkey, former editor of Focus on the Family magazine) cover the spectrum of sex and aging by discussing both male and female menopause, fluctuations in sexual desire, erectile dysfunction, breast and prostate cancer, common temptations and the importance of maintaining good health to enhance peak sexual performance. They offer practical tips and suggestions for the bedroom, demonstrating how spirituality affects sexual intimacy. Specifically, the authors advise couples to work on cultivating a warm relationship before entering the bedroom. They should take time to make thoughtful physical preparations and choose surroundings that are comfortable for both partners. Foreplay should offer a gentle touch, and intercourse involves finding those positions most conducive to mutual pleasure. The authors include a fascinating survey of approximately 800 men and women who answered 71 questions on their sexual history, satisfaction and habits. Each chapter is worthy of thoughtful, careful reading, offering hope to "over-40" married Christian couples. (Oct.) Copyright 2000 Cahners Business Information.
Library Journal
The authors' The Act of Marriage (Zondervan, 1998) has been a best seller among Christian sex manuals. With this latest collaboration, Tim, author of the popular "Left Behind" series, and Beverly, chair of Concerned Women for America, pitch their biblical-supported eroto-positive message to boomers and older. Their combination pep talk, refresher, and repair guide discusses enhancing intimacy, the basics of sexual arousal/response, male and female menopause, erectile dysfunction, breast and prostate cancer, sex and disability, nutrition and exercise, avoiding affairs, and recognizing one's spirituality through accepting Christ. Facts are supported by appropriate references plus survey data from older Christian couples. Stressing wives' satisfaction as well as husbands', this book belongs in all public libraries along with The Act of Marriage and Douglas E. Rosenau's A Celebration of Sex (Thomas Nelson, 1994). Books by credentialed Christian sex counselors Clifford and Joyce Penner, Ed and Gaye Wheat, and Archibald Hart should also be considered.--Martha Cornog, Philadelphia Copyright 2000 Cahners Business Information.

Product Details

ISBN-13:
9780310212003
Publisher:
Zondervan
Publication date:
03/01/1998
Edition description:
Revised Edition
Pages:
400
Sales rank:
60,978
Product dimensions:
4.13(w) x 6.75(h) x 0.88(d)
Age Range:
18 Years

Read an Excerpt

Introduction
This book is unlike any other I have ever written. It should be read only by married couples, those immediately contemplating marriage, and those who counsel married couples.
It is deliberately frank. I have long felt a need for a clear and detailed presentation of the intimate relationship that exists between a husband and wife. Most Christian books on this subject skirt the real issues and leave too much to the imagination; such evasiveness is not adequately instructive. Secular books, on the other hand, often go overboard telling it like it is in crude language repulsive to those who need help. In addition, such books usually advocate practices considered improper by biblical standards.
To keep the facts that every couple needs to know from being offensive, I am writing this book with the help of Beverly, my wife of fifty years. In addition to the delicate sense of balance she brings to this work, I have drawn on her extensive counseling experiences as a minister's wife, conference speaker, and registrar of Christian Heritage College.
Both of us have counseled enough married couples to convince us that an enormous number of them are not enjoying all the blessings of which they are capable or for which God has designed them. We have discovered that many others find the intimacies of married love distasteful and unpleasant. Through the years, we have developed several teaching principles that have helped such people in a relatively short period of time. The requests of counselors, pastors, and others persuaded us that these same principles could help thousands of people if presented in book form.
Before we had had time to begin the project, Dr. Robert K. DeVries, then executive vice president of Zondervan Publishing House, invited us to lunch to present us with the first printed copy of my previous book, How to Win Over Depression. 'A book that is sorely needed today, written by a Christian couple, would concern sexual adjustment in marriage,' he remarked, 'and we would like to ask you two to write it.' We thanked him and promised to pray about it.
At first Bev was reluctant to get heavily involved with the endeavor until the Lord gave her a specific sign. Within the next two months she counseled at least ten wives who were averse to sexual intercourse. The success those women soon achieved in their love lives convinced her that God required her active participation in the project.
As we began to read current literature on the subject, convinced that God meant lovemaking to be enjoyed by both partners, we prayed that He would lead us to make this work fully biblical and highly practical. He provided many counseling illustrations and pertinent suggestions from pastors, doctors, and friends, among them Dr. Ed Wheat, a family physician who has prepared a superb series of lectures on the subject. When we met him at our Family Life Seminar in Tulsa, Oklahoma, he presented us with a complete set of his cassettes and graciously offered us the freedom to use anything in them. We recommend these cassettes to every married couple and those planning to be married in the near future; they are unquestionably the finest we have ever reviewed. In fact, Dr. Wheat includes information in them that we have not found in the fifty or more books we have scrutinized on this subject.
Inasmuch as most of the people we counsel are Christians, we concluded through our reading that Christians generally experience a higher degree of sexual enjoyment than non-Christians. However, there was no way to prove our assumption. We then prepared an intimate survey for married couples and offered it to those who have attended our Family Life Seminars. By comparing the responses with those of secular sex surveys, our conclusions were confirmed and other interesting and valuable facts were discovered. The results of our survey appear in chapter 13, and parts of it are scattered through the book.
While we were writing the last chapter of this book, Redbook magazine published a Sexual Pleasure Survey showing the preferences of 100,000 women. The survey was taken by the magazine and written by Robert J. Levin (coauthor with Masters and Johnson of The Pleasure Bond). The most significant finding of Redbook's survey and the one listed first was that 'sexual satisfaction is related significantly to religious belief. With notable consistency, the greater the intensity of a woman's religious convictions, the likelier she is to be highly satisfied with the sexual pleasures of marriage.' Naturally we were delighted to find that Redbook's survey revealed results quite similar to those of our survey. On the strength of his research Mr. Levin emphatically confirmed that 'strongly religious women (over 25) seem to be more responsive . . . [and] she is more likely than the nonreligious woman to be orgasmic almost every time she engages in sex.' This further convinces us that our presupposition is accurate.
No single book by human beings will ever become the last word on any subject; therefore we don't claim this manual on married love to be final. But we do believe it contains much valuable information helpful to almost any married couple, and several of its insights are not currently found in any other book of its kind. We therefore send it out with our prayers that God will use it to enrich both the love and the love lives of those who read it.

Meet the Author

Tim LaHaye is a New York Times bestselling author of more than 70 nonfiction books, many on biblical prophecy and end-times. He is the coauthor of the record-shattering Left Behind series and is considered one of America's foremost authorities on biblical end-times prophecy.

Beverly LaHaye (www.cwfa.org) is the bestselling author of the Seasons Series (with Terri Blackstock) and The Act of Marriage (with her husband, Tim). She is the founder and chairwoman of Concerned Women for America and shares a daily devotional commentary on the nationally syndicated radio show Concerned Women Today. She and her husband live in southern California.

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Act of Marriage 3.8 out of 5 based on 0 ratings. 17 reviews.
Guest More than 1 year ago
I received this book when i was first married. My soon to be husband and I were both virgins. This book was very helpful, we feel it gave us a jump on people who have been married for years. We both recommend this book very highly.
Guest More than 1 year ago
I am a 20 year old minister, and I can tell you that no other book has been more insightful or helpful in presenting a clear and understandable view of the sancity, necessity, and joy of successful lovemaking in a Christian marraige. For any newlywed or engaged couple, this book can do wonders!
Guest More than 1 year ago
Previous critics have said this book is scientifically inaccurate by not including the pill as a birth control method. They missed the point of the book. Natural family planning is proffered because any other means is outside the Conservative Christian perspective they are trying to address from the book. They do well at giving hope to those who trust God's plan for sex, but have doubts as to how to make real God's promises for their physical growth in marriage.
Guest More than 1 year ago
The book is a beautiful statement on the marriage act. It however contains scientifically inaccurate information in the Famliy Planning section - like not including the pill under the list of abortafacients and misrepresenting Natural Family Planning. Too bad for a book like this that could do such good.
Guest More than 1 year ago
This is an excellent sex manual for newlywed Christian couples, but Dr. and Beverly LaHaye disseminate misinformation in the chapter about birth control. They only natural planning method they mention is the rhythm method, which is inneffectual and obsolete. Natural Family Planning is a COMPLETELY different method to reduce family size WITHOUT artificial contraception. For more info., check out The Art of Natural Family Planning by John and Sheila Kippley (Christian perspective) or Taking Charge of Your Fertility by Toni Weschler (non-Christian perspective).
Guest More than 1 year ago
A very graphic book that deals with issues that other christian books don't get into. This book has a great perspective into what your partner is thinking. A must for all new and old lovers.
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Guest More than 1 year ago
I found the 1976 edition of this book in my mom's book collection after she had passed. I read it thoroughly and found it a little old fashioned but right on. Don't listen to other reviewers, it gives sound, medical facts about family planning. It condemns the IUD because it is basicaly just abortion, but The Pill does not cause abortions, natural planning=kids, etc, ask your MD not your pastor if you don't believe me. This book was really wonderful and even though I have been married for a few years I still found the info very useful and practical. It really explained some things no one had ever mentioned. Very nice book and you don't have to be over 40!
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Great find!
Guest More than 1 year ago
Excellent reading and VERY insightful.