Addict in the Family: Support Through Loss, Hope, and Recovery

by Beverly Conyers

Overview

The family recovery classic, Addict in the Family, has been revised and updated to offer parents and other family members even greater support when faced with the reality of a loved one’s addiction. Solid, actionable advice and information about what helps and what doesn’t—and how to care for themselves—make this an indispensable guide.

For families of addicts, fear, shame, and confusion over a loved one’s addiction can cause deep anxiety, sleepless nights, and even physical illness. The emotional distress family members suffer is often compounded by the belief that they somehow caused or contributed to their loved one’s addiction—or that they could have done something to prevent it.

Addict in the Family is a book about the pain of addiction, but more importantly it is a book of comfort, understanding, and hope for anyone struggling with a loved one’s addiction. As the compelling personal stories reveal, family members do not cause their loved one’s addiction—nor can they control or cure it. What family members can do is find support, set boundaries, detach with love, and eventually discover how to enjoy life more fully. This book helps them do just that—whether the loved one achieves recovery or not.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9781616499563
Publisher:	Hazelden Publishing
Publication date:	10/26/2021
Sold by:	SIMON & SCHUSTER
Format:	eBook
Pages:	225
File size:	1 MB

About the Author

Beverly Conyers, MA—one of the most respected voices in wellness and recovery—has guided hundreds of thousands of readers through the process of recognizing family roles in addiction, healing shame, building healthy relationships, releasing trauma, focusing on emotional sobriety, as well as acknowledging self-sabotaging behaviors, addictive tendencies, and substance use patterns.  

Beverly is a writer and college English teacher who lives in New England. She is the author of Find Your Light, Addict in the Family, Everything Changes, and The Recovering Heart as well as the recovery-focused guided journal Follow Your Light. Conyers began writing about recovery as part of her response to her daughter’s addiction to heroin. Her areas of interest and expertise have expanded to include mindfulness practice and other topics related to recovery, particularly emotional sobriety.

Table of Contents

Preface ix

Introduction 1

1 A Family Disease 7

When an individual becomes addicted, the entire family is affected. Family members can acquire knowledge and skills that enable them to cope effectively with the disease of addiction.

2 The Stranger You Love 19

Addiction is usually accompanied by significant behavioral changes. Some conceal, protect, and perpetuate substance use, while others reveal the effects of alcohol and other drugs on the brain.

3 The Beast Inside 39

The irresistible compulsion to use is deeply rooted in the biological and psychological makeup of addicted individuals. Many are conscious of an "inner addict"-a "beast inside."

4 Who Gets Addicted? 53

Not everyone who uses alcohol or other drugs becomes addicted. Several factors increase an individual's vulnerability to addiction.

5 Addicted to the Addict 67

In an attempt to help their addicted loved one, family members may resort to well-intended but counterproductive behaviors. Often, these behaviors mirror the disease of addiction itself.

6 The Process of Change 89

Making a significant personal change is hard for everyone, especially for people who are seeking recovery. Change often occurs in predictable stages and usually involves setbacks and relapses.

7 Promoting the Addict's Recovery 107

No one can force another person to change. But families can practice strategies that effectively promote and support their loved one's recovery.

8 Promoting the Family's Recovery 135

Families suffer deep distress when a loved one becomes addicted. To recover from the damaging impact of the disease, they can adopt self-care strategies that nurture their own well-being.

9 A Time to Heal 147

In its deepest sense, recovery is a lifelong process of personal growth. It involves healing the wounds of the past to achieve greater wisdom and serenity.

Appendix A Common Addictive Substances: Effects and Signs of Use 161

Appendix B Words of Wisdom 175

Appendix C Resources 179

Appendix D Recommended Reading 183

Notes 185

Acknowledgments 189

About the Author 191

Editorial Reviews

Beverly Conyers shares her ongoing experience and hard-earned wisdom in this updated edition of ‘Addict in the Family’. Full of clarity and comfort, new insights and inspiration, this book—this author—is a treasure for anyone who loves someone struggling with the disease of addiction.

Sandy Swenson

For well over a decade Beverly Conyers's "Addict in the Family" has been one of our a top recommendations for family members to read. Often we blame ourselves for a disease that we can not control. We experience many forms of grief for those living as well as those who we have lost. Beverly reminds us in her writing that we are not alone, we are not in control of others but we can control our reactions which in turn at times can become helpful to our loved ones. Also Beverly reminds us that there is HOPE and RECOVERY for both the family and the loved one experiencing addiction. I will be forever grateful for Beverly's writing which also helps me heal in my journey.

Joanne Peterson