Addicted to Foo-Foos: a Beach Slapped Humor Collection (2009)

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Overview

Coming to grips with a life-long addiction to brightly colored drinks with umbrellas is just one of the things Amazon.com best-selling author Barton Grover Howe addresses in his latest compilation of newspaper humor columns. Among the highlights: advice to Madison Avenue on how to reach men ("Remember: we're the kind of people that buy Colt 40 Malt Liquor because it's huge and we can use the bottles in a water fight when we run out of balloons."); pondering about how Madison Avenue chooses to reach women ("There ...
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Addicted to Foo-Foos: A Beach Slapped Humor Collection (2009)

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Overview

Coming to grips with a life-long addiction to brightly colored drinks with umbrellas is just one of the things Amazon.com best-selling author Barton Grover Howe addresses in his latest compilation of newspaper humor columns. Among the highlights: advice to Madison Avenue on how to reach men ("Remember: we're the kind of people that buy Colt 40 Malt Liquor because it's huge and we can use the bottles in a water fight when we run out of balloons."); pondering about how Madison Avenue chooses to reach women ("There are a LOT of women's hygiene products, most of them being disposable. Which begs the question: Why not label all of them that way? I can't imagine anyone buys these things as a souvenir."); and observations on all of humanity's attempts to figure out what's going on in his bedroom. ("Trying to get pregnant seems to be EVERYBODY's business, as if, somehow, the entire future of the human race is riding on my wife and I repopulating the species. It's like I'm in a terrible Bruce Willis movie set in 2057. Or Brigham Young's house in 1857.")

So, head to the beaches of the Pacific Northwest one more time as Barton uses his unique perspective on just about everything to comment on life, the universe and gender things - and get "Beach Slapped" all over again.

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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9781478337201
  • Publisher: CreateSpace Publishing
  • Publication date: 8/9/2012
  • Pages: 140
  • Product dimensions: 5.50 (w) x 8.50 (h) x 0.33 (d)

Meet the Author

Barton Grover Howe resides in the only small town on the Oregon coast that has seven miles of coastline and not one boat dock. A high school teacher, his students don't find him near as funny as he thinks they should - much like their parents, who use teacher conferences to tell him they have no idea what he's talking about half the time in his weekly humor column. On the plus side, he is married to the most patient woman on Earth and is father to the cutest daughter in the universe, who got all of her looks from her mother.
In addition to writing a weekly humor column, Barton is also an Amazon Top 10 best-selling novelist, bringing his weird sense of humor to tell the stories of Surfland, Oregon. The fictional home for the wet and weird, his first novel, "Beach Slapped" takes readers on an adventure that's been called by reviewers a "well written, tightly plotted romp." His next novel, "Total Beach," promises more of the same
"Move over Carl Hiaasen, Tim Dorsey, Dave Barry and all the other Florida humor satire writers. There's a new voice and a very accomplished one... Howe does for the Oregon Coast what Hiaasen and the others have done for Florida."
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    Posted February 7, 2014

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