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Much of the power of Tyler's story comes from the way she follows Michael and Pauline Anton -- the amateurs of the title -- down through the postwar decades that follow their youthful meeting in the heady days following the attack on Pearl Harbor. Capturing the sense of both uncertainty and exhilaration that characterized the mood of the nation, Tyler relates how the careful, methodical Michael encounters impulsive, sparky Pauline at a moment when their very different personalities seem to pull them toward one another -- though later it will be those same differences that drive them apart. Without ever betraying or abusing one another, they nevertheless embark on courses that result in a greater and greater sense of separation.
As Michael and Pauline mature, raise a family, move to the suburbs, and grow steadily more perplexed by one another's stubborn characters, we watch as the cultural changes of the 1960s transform the American cultural landscape -- and when their oldest daughter runs away, the Antons confront the world of drugs and youth culture with a suddenness that strips them of a layer of self-protective denial. Though they forge on together, Michael and Pauline are changed by their loss; when the breaking point unexpectedly comes, it's both a relief and a tragedy. Reading groups will be moved to discuss the ways these two powerful personalities both support and fail one another, and how The Amateur Marriage leads us to see this unhappy union from both perspectives.
Book clubs will also find that Tyler's two-sided approach, in which the narrative moves back and forth between the perspectives of Pauline and Michael, to be revelatory. And woven in between the sections devoted to these two are chapters told from the points of view of their children. In so doing, Tyler suggests that this battle of wills does not dissolve when the principals stop arguing. Rather, it has a life of its own and has shaped their children's personalities and futures, for good and for bad. Readers will discover that Tyler has offered a novel without a hero or a villain, one that nevertheless brilliantly comprehends the extremes of pain and happiness that comprise an "ordinary" family's life.
Discussion Questions from the Publisher
1. What is noticeable about the narrative voice in the first chapter? At the end of the chapter the narrator states, “They were such a perfect couple. They were taking their very first steps on the amazing journey of marriage, and wonderful adventures were about to unfold in front of them” (p. 34). Whose voice is this meant to be? Why is the chapter called “Common Knowledge”?
2. How does the presence of Mrs. Anton affect Michael and Pauline’s marriage? What has made Mrs. Anton so dependent on her son? Is Michael unfair to Pauline in expecting her to care for his mother? Who is Michael more obligated to—his mother or his wife?
3. How is Pauline’s flirtation with Alex Barrow related to the letters she sent Michael while he was away in the army (pp. 54–55)? What does the reader learn about her character in the chapter called “The Anxiety Committee”? Would someone like Alex Barrow have been a better choice for Pauline? What goes through her mind as she sits downstairs alone? Why does she decide not to go out and meet him that night?
4. In its early chapters, The Amateur Marriage gives readers a view of life in an ethnic working-class neighborhood in Baltimore. Later, the setting shifts to a newly built suburb, where the family gradually moves into the middle class. What are the effects of this shift on the family? How does Anton’s experience reflect a change in American family life in the postwar decades?
5. Michael thinks of Pauline as “a frantic, impossible woman, so unstable, even in good moods, with her exultant voice and glittery eyes, her dangerous excitement” (p. 167). Meanwhile Pauline “chafed daily at . . . his rigidity, his caution, his literal-mindedness . . . his reluctance to spend money, his suspicion of anything unfamiliar, his tendency to pass judgment . . . [and] his magical ability to make her seem hysterical” (p. 75). Does the narrative present us with a more positive view of Michael or of Pauline? Who is the more sympathetic character?
6. Pauline enters Michael’s life in a vivid red coat, bleeding because she jumped impulsively from a streetcar to join a parade (pp. 3–5). Does the report of her death in a car accident years later (pp. 275–76) imply that Pauline hasn’t changed? Why does Tyler frame Pauline’s presence in the novel with two accidents?
7. As he posed in the photography studio for a fifteenth-anniversary portrait with Pauline, Michael remembers thinking, “Who was this woman? What did she have to do with him? How could they be expected to share a house, rear children together, combine their separate lives for all time? The knob of her shoulder pressing into his armpit had felt like an inanimate object” (p. 137). The photograph shows “Mr. and Mrs. Perfectly Fine. . . . An advertisement for marriage” (p. 137). Are these thoughts an indication that, for Michael at least, the marriage is doomed? How does this photograph relate to the double portrait described on p. 172? What distinction is Tyler making between the public and private aspects of married life?
8. Reflecting on his marriage, Michael imagines that “all those young marrieds of the war years” have grown “wise and seasoned and comfortable in their roles, until only he and Pauline remained, as inexperienced as ever—the last couple left in the amateurs’ parade” (p. 168). He felt they were “more like brother and sister than husband and wife. This constant elbowing and competing, jockeying for position, glorying in I-told-you-so” (p. 168). How common are the problems that Michael and Pauline experience in their relationship? Is Michael correct in thinking that he and Pauline are unusual in their long-standing “amateur marriage”?
9. Do Michael and Pauline handle their trip to San Francisco well or badly? Why do they take Pagan home without pursuing their attempt to bring Lindy home as well? Why do they never go back and try again? Does the episode suggest that they are both fundamentally passive and ineffectual people? Or does it suggest, on the other hand, that they are realistic and know how to protect themselves from grief?
10. How is the narrative organized, and how do the chapters handle the flow of time? What is achieved in the structure that Tyler has chosen for this novel? Does the narrative point of view tend to illuminate the thoughts of all characters equally? If not, into which characters are we are given more insight and access?
11. In what ways does Tyler distinguish herself from other contemporary novelists you have read? Look closely at a few favorite passages and discuss how she achieves the effects of style, humor, and insight that make her work so enjoyable.
12. “Time,” Anne Tyler has said, “has always been a central obsession of mine—what it does to people, how it can constitute a plot all on its own.”* Does Michael’s decision to leave the marriage after thirty years, and his careful courtship of Anna, reveal a desire to redeem lost time? How is his relationship with Anna different from his first marriage? Why doesn’t Pauline remarry?
13. How surprising is the reappearance of Lindy? Why has Lindy never tried to contact Pagan before this? Is her return to the story satisfying or not?
14. To Lindy, the family was like “an animal caught in a trap. . . . Just the five of us in this wretched, tangled knot, inward-turned, stunted, like a trapped fox chewing its own leg off” (p. 300). Does Tyler suggest that such a feeling is natural when people feel alienated from their families or misunderstood by them? What might Michael and Pauline have done differently? Is their helplessness in the face of Lindy’s unhappiness their own fault, or does the novel suggest that there is a limit to what parents can feel responsible for?
15. How are George and Karen affected in their development by the disappearance of Lindy and by their parents’ troubled marriage? Does Tyler suggest that children become themselves in spite of, or in reaction to, family stresses?
16. Anne Tyler has said, “My fondest hope for any of my novels is that readers will feel, after finishing it, that for a while they have actually stepped inside another person’s life and come to feel related to that person.”* Does The Amateur Marriage achieve this goal?
Suggested ReadingAnonymous
Posted August 2, 2004
All we want to know from a customer review is: do you like it or not? So do I like it? Yes! Emphatically!
1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.
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Posted July 9, 2010
It is so hard to end a book like Amatuer Marriage. Following these young people thru life, and getting to know the family, with all there faults just like us, it was difficult to get to the end. Very emotional, and hard to say goodbye. Highly recommend.
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Posted January 30, 2010
I Also Recommend:
This story tells the evolution of a marriage over the span of 60 years, starting when the couple first meets during World War II. The main characters get caught up in the hysteria of the war end up together, despite their incompatibility. At times the story is both touching and heartbreaking. It is definitely worth the read!
Was this review helpful? Yes NoThank you for your feedback. Report this reviewThank you, this review has been flagged.In this novel by Anne Tyler two attractive young people rush into marriage at the beginning of World War II. Over the years they experience the same things as their friends but can't seem to mend differences unlike other couples. When they finally move to an upscale neighborhood only Pauline (the wife) is happy; Michael misses his friends and the area where he grew up. Too soon they find themselves responsible for a grandchild but instead of this drawing them closer it broadens the gap between them. A return trip to the old neighborhood some thirty years later finally convinces Michael that you can't go home to the same things you once knew.
In this book author Anne Tyler rounds out her characters with such depth that this reader felt on an intimate basis with them. While the story touches on everyday aspects that everyone will recognize, the characters are sure to evoke a sense of rightness with the way they are brought to life.
A pleasure to read. Recommended: all of Anne Tyler's other works.
Anonymous
Posted March 30, 2006
I am not sure what Tyler was trying to accomplish with this book. It was a common portrayal of a common family. The prose wasn't even interesting. Very disappointing.
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Posted March 10, 2006
I found so much in this book that I could identify with - my parents, my early life, parts of my own history (which dates back to 1948). The characters and situations were real and easy to follow. Couldn't put the book down! Outstanding and recommended.
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Posted October 23, 2005
I felt that this book was pretty boring and lost interest after the 1st half. I guess I expected more action, more romance, more something....it is fast read and made me contemplate my own marriage which was a bonus.
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Posted April 23, 2005
'The Amateur Marriage' is the first novel I have read of Anne Tyler's and I found the story to be very captivating. Each chapter brings you to a different time, beginning in the year 1941 and ending three generations later. The story had many ups, downs, twists and turns to the lives of the main characters, Michael and Pauline. Everything in Michael and Pauline's life would be perfect one moment, then unbearable to cope with the next. I grew up in the third generation of this story, so reading about the styles of living in my grandparent's generation was fascinating. Tyler describes the challenging obstacles encountered in this mistaken marriage. With all the dramatic literature and emotional tension, 'The Amateur Marriage,' is a novel to remember! I look forward to reading the earlier novels by Anne Tyler.
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Posted February 4, 2005
I'm a great fan of Anne Tyler and look foward to every new book she writes.The Amateur Marriage was a great read ,I couldn't put it down, I found this novel a tad more serious than her other querky novels although given the subjects she deals with in this novel the tone is appropiate .Again wonderful writng as usual and I look forward to her next book
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Posted November 30, 2004
This book was terrific. I started it on an airplane, and I was so enthusiastic about it, I barely even watched the in-flight movie!!! You could read it in one sitting if you were very ambitious.
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Posted October 22, 2004
With a turgidity, Anne Tyler attacks her lean, tired middle class characters and their plummet through life. There is too much of a workman like quality to the prose. Still the dialogue is perfect and the portraits every bit as good as anything Ansel Adams might have done with a touch of shrooms in his system.
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Posted August 10, 2004
This book was completely BORING...unlikeable characters, boring pace...I NEVER stop reading a book but I finally skimmed the last two chapters just to be done...
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Posted June 15, 2004
The only reason I gave this book two stars was for the historical timeline. I don't think I have ever read a book so full of unlikeable people. I did finish the book but only because I was certain at some point the book would 'come together'. It never did. This is the first book I have read of Anne Tyler's. It will probably be the last.
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Posted July 6, 2004
I have read reviews by readers like me. It seems that most of them did not like this novel. I have been reading Anne Tyler since 1988 and have read all her novels. I just can't stop reading her books, no matter if one is not as powerful as the other. I will always read everything she writes. I don't even have to read reviews. She is a genius and my favorite writer after Charles Dickens. I even went to Roland Park when I found out it really existed. If you read her books, you will know that she sets all of them in Baltimore. I am not overstating things when I say that her books have always cheered me up, kept me interested and made me happy. I hope she writes for many more years to come. I read her latest in three days. I can never put her books down.
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Posted April 1, 2004
If you want to read about the duldrums of an ordinary dull marriage---enjoy. However life is far from this simple--the unwritten thoughts of the subjects would create a far-more-truthful look at what it takes to keep a marriage alive.
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Posted March 14, 2004
This book was hum-drum. I'm sorry I wasted the money on a hard cover. I did not find one sentence that I found so insightful that I had to write it down (a habit of mine). It is not eloquently written nor was the story particularly poignant. The only sub-plot that was fascinating was Lindy's disappearance. Her return, decades later, was simply unplausible...she would have returned many years sooner. A child named 'Pagan'...how ridiculous and totally scripted (drug mother in Haight-Asbury). The change of point of view was distressing. During the 'grilled cheese' scene it suddenly switched to Karen but she never returned. George's point of view didn't exist until the end when he lamented, 'Wasn't I enough to keep you here?' We were never given the impression that Lindy and George were that close. Ever. The fact that Pauline wasn't there for Lindy's reunion was a disappointment. She was the one who keep Lindy ALIVE. This read was truly a disappointment and leads me to think, Why is this a bestseller?
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Posted March 15, 2004
I loved this book. It is so much more than the story of two mismatched individuals who get married in haste. The attachment Michael and Pauline have to one another, even years after they ultimately divorce, is beautifully expressed. The tragedy is of two people who are unable to understand each other and communicate with each other. In spite of all the turmoil the ties between these two cannot be broken. The last chapter is everything: sweet, sad, sentimental. Following these two from age 20 to age 80 made me so aware of my own inevitable aging, and the bittersweet reality of life's constant changing.
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Posted May 3, 2004
BORING! As I began each chapter, I was confident that the story was either (a) going to get interesting or (b) going to reveal its purpose. Unfortunately, I reached the end of the book without either happening.
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Posted February 6, 2004
I like Tyler, I like most of her books but from page 1 till the ending I was depressed. I couldn't get in synch w/ anyone, just made the world look ugly.
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Posted February 8, 2004
I LOVE ANNE TYLER'S BOOKS. I STARTED READING IT ON THE PLANE TO THE BAHAMAS AND THOUGHT I'D HAVE IT TO READ ON THE PLANE RIDE HOME....NOPE FINISHED IT BY THE POOL! ONE OF HER BEST.
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Overview
From the inimitable Anne Tyler, a rich and compelling novel about a mismatched marriage—and its consequences, spanning three generations.They seemed like the perfect couple—young, good-looking, made for each other. The moment Pauline, a stranger to the Polish Eastern Avenue neighborhood of Baltimore (though she lived only twenty minutes away), walked into his mother’s grocery store, Michael was smitten. And in the heat of World War II fervor, they are propelled into a hasty wedding. But they never should have married.
Pauline, impulsive, impractical, tumbles hit-or-miss through ...