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How many of us have seen relationships in our families or the families of others erupt into angry words? How many times have our teens and pre-teens slammed doors in our faces or defied us with angry words when we were trying to help? Every family knows the pain of anger, but many do not know how to work through the anger to a happy resolution. In this practical book, anger experts Drs. Les Carter and Frank Minirth-coauthors of the bestselling The Anger Workbook-show families how the "blame game" (parents blame ...
How many of us have seen relationships in our families or the families of others erupt into angry words? How many times have our teens and pre-teens slammed doors in our faces or defied us with angry words when we were trying to help? Every family knows the pain of anger, but many do not know how to work through the anger to a happy resolution. In this practical book, anger experts Drs. Les Carter and Frank Minirth-coauthors of the bestselling The Anger Workbook-show families how the "blame game" (parents blame the kids/kids blame the parents) doesn't work, and instead provide proven techniques for dealing with the root causes of anger. In a perfect blend of biblical wisdom and psychological research, they show readers how to understand what can be right about anger, distinguish between healthy and unhealthy anger, recognize how anger can be managed more successfully by controlling desires and insecurities and addressing other underlying issues, and much more. Filled with real-life examples, checklists, evaluation tools, and study questions, this valuable resource for any parent with a preteen or teenager will help parents understand and manage their children's anger -as well as their own- and show how to create harmony at home. Dr. Les Carter (Richardson, TX) is a nationally known psychotherapist at the Minirth Clinic in Richardson, Texas, where he has practiced since 1980. He has authored or coauthored 17 books including The Anger Trap (0-787-96879-X) and has been featured on hundreds of radio broadcasts across America. Dr. Frank Minirth (Richardson, TX) is President of the Minirth Clinic, which he founded in 1975. The author or coauthor of more than 50 books, he is featured on Life Perspective with Don Hawkins, a national program currently on 55 stations, and on American Family Radio, currently on 200 radio stations in America.
Preface and Acknowledgments.
Twelve Steps Toward Anger Management for Parents.
1. The Purpose of Anger.
Step 1: Learn to identify what is behind the expression of anger, and make that a primary focus.
2. How Anger Is Mismanaged.
Step 2: Be aware of the ways you may choose to handle anger poorly, so you can be specific in your efforts to improve.
3. Healthy Ways to Manage Anger.
Step 3: When you have a responsible message to communicate, do so in a way that upholds the dignity of the others involved.
4. Breaking Your Cycles of Dependency.
Step 4: Have a strong sense of purpose as a parent in order to respond to anger-producing circumstances as an initiator, not a reactor.
5. Dropping Excessive Control.
Step 5: Realize that the best way to be in control is to diminish control tactics, speaking instead about choices.
6. The Struggle for Superiority.
Step 6: Refuse to lord over your child, but speak instead as one who believes in the equal worth of each family member.
7. Anger as an Ego Trip.
Step 7: Let humility be your guide as you demonstrate to your children that selfishness has no place in successful anger management.
8. Dropping Defenses.
Step 8: Don’t be threatened by an adversarial response, but be confident in your own response.
9. Establishing Boundaries.
Step 9: Respect the fact that each family member is responsible for his or her choices.
10. Myths That Perpetuate Anger.
Step 10: Identify the false assumptions that feed youranger, and let truth guide your decisions in discipline.
11. Displaced Anger.
Step 11: Identify your own outside stressors that create anger, and choose to address them separately, as opposed to bringing them into parental communication.
12. The Overcomer’s Mind-Set.
Step 12: Set aside an attitude of defeat, and recognize that in each situation you can choose to be an overcomer.
Anger, Teenagers, and Medication.
Posted April 11, 2011
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