Anxious in Love: How to Manage Your Anxiety, Reduce Conflict, and Reconnect with Your Partner [NOOK Book]

Overview


Healthy relationships require trust, intimacy, effective communication, and understanding. However, if you suffer from chronic anxiety you may have trouble dealing with everyday conflicts and tensions that can arise in relationships. No matter how committed you are, anxiety can leave you feeling distanced from your partner. Fortunately, there are steps you can take to overcome the anxiety-fueled reactions that keep you from achieving true closeness in your relationship.

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Anxious in Love: How to Manage Your Anxiety, Reduce Conflict, and Reconnect with Your Partner

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Overview


Healthy relationships require trust, intimacy, effective communication, and understanding. However, if you suffer from chronic anxiety you may have trouble dealing with everyday conflicts and tensions that can arise in relationships. No matter how committed you are, anxiety can leave you feeling distanced from your partner. Fortunately, there are steps you can take to overcome the anxiety-fueled reactions that keep you from achieving true closeness in your relationship.

Written by two experts on anxiety disorders, Anxious in Love offers easy-to-use techniques for calming anxieties and strengthening communication in your relationship. With this book, you will learn to stay centered when faced with conflict, understand your partner’s perspective, and become more independent. By changing the way you react to triggers and stress, you will be able to focus on enjoying time with the one you love, without anxiety getting in the way.

 

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Editorial Reviews

Publishers Weekly
Here's a self-help book for the truly anxious, not nail-biters but those whose level of fear or anxiety is debilitating and "disproportionate to the situation." Psychologists Daitch and Lorberbaum provide a brief overview of anxiety disorders, ranging from phobias to obsessive compulsive disorders to post-traumatic stress disorders-often associated with combat but also linked to violent crimes and the aftermath of "a loved one's death." First, the authors attempt to help readers understand their reactions through helpful self-assessment quizzes, then offer corresponding exercises to reduce anxiety. Next, the authors offer ways to understand what each partner can do to prevent or reduce anxiety and increase compassion. For example, to one partner a flooded kitchen is an inconvenience, but to the partner with OCD, it's an incomprehensible challenge. While there's plenty of therapy-speak in the book (validating your partner, practicing "attunement"), the authors provide realistic and empathetic approaches, and easy-to-follow advice for anxiety-laden individuals and their partners. Daitch and Lorberbaum emphasize that "practice makes permanent," and couples willing to make such a commitment will benefit from this book.
(c) Copyright PWxyz, LLC. All rights reserved.
From the Publisher

“Anxiety is, without doubt, the greatest enemy faced by couples, and its regulation is the most challenging and important achievement in marital happiness. The authors describe this crucial dilemma with deep and profound clarity and its resolution in clear instructions and exercises. Every couple who follows this path will end up in the kingdom of marital bliss. As the authors say, practice leads to permanence. I recommend this book not only to all couples, but also to all couples therapists. It will make their work with couples less anxious!”

—Harville Hendrix, PhD, author of Getting the Love You Want and coauthor of Receiving Love with Helen LaKelly Hunt, PhD

Anxious in Love brings help for anxiety disorders into new territory, revealing how it can affect both partners in a relationship and endanger the well-being of their connection. In a compassionate, step-by-step strategy, the anxiety disorder is first managed, and then mastered using both behavioral and psychological tools. Ultimately these practices are woven into an effective program for couples to use—one that empowers both partners to calm the inner and outer effects of anxiety on their relationship and maintain a quality connection. Anxious in Love is an invaluable resource and guide for anyone suffering from an anxiety disorder or anyone in a relationship with someone who suffers from anxiety.”

—Eleanor Payson, LMSW, author of The Wizard of Oz and Other Narcissists

“Anxiety, phobias, compulsions, and social avoidance can erode and even destroy relationships. Anxious in Love gives you the tools to decrease, manage, and even eliminate your excessive anxiety (or to understand your anxious partner). After reading the simple but powerful methods in the book, I am confident you'll be anxious to try them and will feel better right away.”

—Bill O'Hanlon, author of The Change Your Life Book and Rewriting Love Stories

“Above all, therapists should not overlook the great advantage of prescribing Anxious in Love as a workbook for patients to use in tandem with ongoing psychotherapy. Its use will help patients get more out of their therapy by promoting self-awareness and self-reliance, as well as expanding self-care for stabilization, boundary development, and affect management.”

—Claire Frederick, MD, coauthor of Inner Strengths and Healing the Divided Self

“This book is written primarily for people suffering from anxiety, but also for their partners. . . . There is a wide range of specific exercises for readers to try, so they can find what works best to reduce the overall anxiety level, recognize emotional and physical triggering experiences so the anxious reaction can be prevented, and perhaps most importantly, to learn to be calm, not merely avoiding the anxiety. . . . The authors bring multiple human examples from their decades of clinical experience, simple assessments, and many practical exercises. They create a light and reassuring mood with a genuine concern to assist healing. . . . Anyone suffering from the potentially crippling fallout from any of the potentially crippling experiences of anxiety is likely to have significant benefit from actively engaging with this book.”

—Robert B. McNeilly, MBBS, CET, director of the Milton H. Erickson Institute of Tasmania

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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9781608822331
  • Publisher: New Harbinger Publications
  • Publication date: 12/1/2012
  • Series: New Harbinger Best Practices Series
  • Sold by: Barnes & Noble
  • Format: eBook
  • Pages: 208
  • Sales rank: 271,063
  • File size: 794 KB

Meet the Author


Carolyn Daitch, PhD, has been a psychologist in private practice for 30 years. She is director of the Center for the Treatment of Anxiety Disorders in Farmington Hills, MI, and acts as a consultant to the University of Michigan School of Medicine's Department of Complementary and Alternative Research, as well as Wayne State University's School of Medicine. Her time is divided among the areas of clinical practice, supervision, consultation and teaching. She routinely delivers trainings and presentations to practitioners in the United States and abroad.Dr. Daitch received the Life Time Achievement Award from the Michigan Society of Clinical Hypnosis in June 2008, and the Presidential Award from the American Society of Clinical Hypnosis in March 2008.
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Table of Contents

Acknowledgments v

Introduction 1

Part 1 Dialing Down Distress

1 Understanding Your Anxiety 9

2 Recognizing Your Anxiety Triggers and Plugging the Dam 41

3 Lowering Your Baseline Level of Anxiety: The Daily Stress Inoculation 67

Part 2 Connecting with the One You Love

4 Understanding Your Partner 89

5 Changing How You Handle Conflict 107

6 Increasing Compassion, Empathy, and Connection 125

Part 3 Taking It to the Next Level

7 Moving toward Healthy Interdependence 145

8 The Wise Relationship 161

9 Maintaining the Fruits of Your Labor 171

Appendices

A Tips for Nonanxious Partners 179

B Exercise for Nonanxious Partners-Soften Judgment, Access Appreciation 183

C Anxious in Love The Book in Sixty Seconds 187

E Resources 189

References 197

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