Table of Contents
Preface xiii
Part I So This is Awkward
1 What Does It Mean to Be Awkward? 3
Our Fundamental Need to Belong 8
We All Have Awkward Moments 13
Squares, Geeks, and Nerds 17
Seeing the World Through Awkward Eyes 19
2 Is There Anything Wrong With Being Awkward? 25
Strange and Intense 30
Is Awkwardness on the Spectrum? 32
Extroverted, Confident, and Totally Awkward 39
Dreaming of Social Fluency 42
3 Looking for Some Sweet Skills 46
This is Your Brain on Awkwardness 49
Get a Cue 52
Can You Really "See it in their Eyes"? 54
How Did My Foot Get in My Mouth? 57
When Minds Meander 62
4 Emotions Make Me Feel Funny 66
Can We Just Skip the Emotional Parts? 70
An Intense World of Emotion5 72
The Function of Feeling Awkward 76
Broadening A Narrow Focus 80
Why Are You Making that Face? 85
5 Unlocking the Minds of Likable People 88
Theory of an Awkward Mind 91
A Theory of Being Likable 94
The Surprising Social Skill of Bullies 99
The Devil is in the Details 102
The Value of Social Equity 105
Part II This is Getting Awkward
How Modern Societal Shifts are Making Everyone Feel more Awkward
6 Nurturing Awkward Children 113
The Nature of Awkward Families 117
Awkward Impulses Versus Social Expectations 122
The Pleasure in Being Awkward 125
A Supercharged Superego 128
Helping Awkward Kids Build Social Fundamentals 133
Bake a Second Batch 137
7 The Awkwardness of Making Friends 142
How Many Friends are Enough? 144
The Demise of Social Institutions 149
Never Mind My P's and Q's 155
Making Friends While Awkward 157
Trickle-Down Social Economics 164
8 Dating and Sex Are So Awkward 166
What Happened to the "Romantic" in Romantic Relationships? 168
Gerrymandering the Friend Zone 170
Online Dating Can be an Awkwardness Incubator 173
Sex is Super-Awkward 177
Intimately Awkward 182
The Awkward Path to Happily Ever After 187
Part III How the Awkward Become Awesome
9 Practically Prodigious 193
When Awkwardness is Adaptive 194
Giftedness is Singular, Not Plural 197
A Restless Mind 201
The Relationship Between Giftedness and Awkwardness 204
Being True to Yourself and Fitting in 213
10 Groundbreaking Innovation 217
The Future Perfect 219
The Comfort of Expertise 220
Winning the Innovation Lottery 222
Imperfect Brilliance 228
Afterword 233
Acknowledgments 239
Bibliography 241
Index 251