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Bald in the Merde
     

Bald in the Merde

by Suzanne White, Pete Gergely (Illustrator)
 
A jaunty, illustrated adventure in the art of wig buying in Provence. Laughing all the way. Available in paperback right here! Soon to be a motion picture starring Susan Sarandon as the woman in the wig. Get your copy of BALD IN THE MERDE while they are still cheap.

When French people are in dire circumstances, they tell you they are in "La Merde" (merde means poop

Overview

A jaunty, illustrated adventure in the art of wig buying in Provence. Laughing all the way. Available in paperback right here! Soon to be a motion picture starring Susan Sarandon as the woman in the wig. Get your copy of BALD IN THE MERDE while they are still cheap.

When French people are in dire circumstances, they tell you they are in "La Merde" (merde means poop). Well, I was in France. In a small town. In chemotherapy. I was in deep Merde.

Like French trains, right on schedule, 18 days after the first chemo treatment, my longish blonde hair began taking nightly hikes across the vast plains of my bedclothes, electing residence in messy clumps on the back of my couch and upholstering the jackets of all the friends on whose shoulders I was crying.

"Get a wig!" they clamored. "Get yourself a wig."

"Me? Ms. Authenticity. You want ME to wear a wig?" I wailed.

Soon, great white patches of skin all over my head glared through sparse tufts of what was left of my hair. I looked a sight. "Okay" I shrugged and sighed a mist of exasperation steam onto my looking glass. "I'll get a wig."

I went into town to have my head shaved. But I ran into opposition from Jean, my hairdresser. He preferred to snip what was left of my hair to one short centimeter all over my head. Now a cover-up was urgent. I had to do something - and fast! I hurried on up to the local "Capillary Institute" to be fitted for a wig.

There, I met Danièle, the town wig monger. And that's when the fun began.
Danièle was everything I feared in a person who sells wigs for chemo patients. Her giddy desire to see me topped by some kind of "coiffure" that pleased her (and not me) makes for quite a jolly tale.

Happy ending? Find out now. Download BALD IN THE MERDE and decide for yourself.

P.S. This book was abridged and appeared in The New York Times Sunday Magazine on May 2, 2010.

Product Details

ISBN-13:
9781475142792
Publisher:
CreateSpace Publishing
Publication date:
04/27/2012
Pages:
44
Product dimensions:
6.00(w) x 9.00(h) x 0.09(d)

Meet the Author

Writers like solitude. I look for my solitude in big cities. Different ones every year.

I am American, but I live in France and Buenos Aires. But when I house swap I try to find something in northern California. I have been a college professor, a fashion model, a journalist, an interpreter, a novelist, a fireworks salesperson, director of a Parisian Couture boutique, an elevator operator, a shoe salesperson, a single mother and a simultaneous translator. Best thing I ever did was write books.

I have mostly lived in Paris my whole adult life. In 1971, my first article appeared in US Cosmopolitan Then, in 1973, I wrote a novel called Ladyfingers. It was published by a major New York publisher. I was actually going to be able to earn a living as "a writer". I longed to go on writing stories, but my literary agent decided I should write non fiction. "What is non fiction?" I asked. "I just want to write stories."

She said, "Novels are risky. They might sell. They might not. If you only write novels, your children will starve."

She gave me a choice between Cooking and Astrology. Julia Child I was not. I agreed to write an astrology book. But on one condition... I would write about Chinese Astrology - the animal signs. In 1975 I published my first Chinese Astrology book. It was a huge hit. Since, I have written four best-selling books about Astrology. My readers have dubbed me "The High Priestess". Makes me giggle.

BALD IN THE MERDE originally appeared (abridged) as a feature article in The New York Times Sunday Magazine of May 2, 2010

I love Facebook and Twitter where I can actually talk to readers one on one. I sell all my books as e-bboks on Kindle, Nook, Smashwords and Amazon.

Contact me for personalized readings. I can solve your problems using your astrological chart, my vast life experience and your cooperation. Feel free to write to me at: suzanwhite@aol.com.

BOOKS BY SUZANNE WHITE

CHINESE ASTROLOGY PLAIN AND SIMPLE

THE NEW ASTROLOGY

LA DOUBLE ASTROLOGIE

LA DOBLE ASTROLOGIA

THE NEW CHINESE ASTROLOGY

LA NEUVA ASTROLOGIA CHINA

THE ASTROLOGY OF LOVE

LADYFINGERS (A NOVEL)

BALD IN THE MERDE (A NOVELETTE)

Available in all formats (ebook and paper) from all Booksellers

and on Amazon.com

on Kindle, Nook and other Electronic Readers

Person-to-person SKYPE Readings, Books, Chapters, Horoscopes and

Lifestyle Advice

at http://www.suzannewhite.com

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