Read an Excerpt
Being Sad When Someone Dies
A Book about Grief
By Linus Mundy, Anne FitzGerald
Abbey PressCopyright © 2012 Linus Mundy
All rights reserved.
So many feelings.
When someone you love dies, you have so many feelings—feelings that you don't like. You may feel sad. You might also feel a little bit scared, mixed-up, lost, yucky in the stomach, angry, or worried. You may even feel "numb"—no feelings inside, at all—because you are so surprised that this happened.
You might even have all of these feelings at the same time.
Being sad is not being bad.
Some people think they should pretend that nothing bad happened when someone dies. They think that if they don't cry or say or do anything different, maybe things will be better.
But you can't just forget that a person you loved died. Because you loved that person.
We can all help each other.
One good thing that happens when someone you love dies, is that people want to help each other at this time. They want to make the sadness not quite so bad, the badness not quite so sad. They want to be with people who know how they're feeling.
Talking about your feelings.
Talking to a grown-up or a friend can really help with your sad feelings. Your parent or grandparent or teacher might be the best persons to talk with.
Some of the people they have loved have died in the past, and so they know some of the things that can help.
Talking about the person who died.
You may hear people saying nice things about the person who died, and telling stories and maybe even laughing. It is good to remember the good things about this person and to talk about him or her.
You may want to try copying some of the good things this person did. If your loved one had a garden or a special plant, you may want to plant a garden or take care of a plant, too.
God is with you and the person who died.
Our religion teaches us that only a person's body dies. We all have a soul that never dies. Our souls go to heaven to be with God who loves the one who has died as much as you do.
It helps to know this. But it still hurts that our friend or family member died and we can't hug them or talk to them anymore.
Remembering good things helps.
Thinking about the good things you did when the person was alive can help a lot.
Yes, it may make you sad to think that you can't do more good things with that person. But remembering the happy times you had together can make you very glad that this person was alive and shared with you.
Something to help you remember.
Maybe you can ask your mom or dad to get you a reminder of the person who died. It might be a wooden spoon that your grandparent let you use to help cook, or a book that your uncle really liked, or maybe a happy picture of the person that you can frame and put in your room.
Excerpted from Being Sad When Someone Dies by Linus Mundy, Anne FitzGerald. Copyright © 2012 Linus Mundy. Excerpted by permission of Abbey Press.
All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
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