Bite Me

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More About This Book

Overview

The city of San Francisco is being stalked by a huge shaved vampyre cat named Chet, and only I, Abby Normal, emergency back-up mistress of the great Bay Area night, and my mangahaired love monkey, Foo Dog, stand between the ravenous monster and a bloody massacre of the general public.

Whoa. And this is a love story? Yup. See, while some lovers were born to run, Jody and Tommy were born to bite. Well, reborn, that is, now that they're vampires. Good thing theirs is an undying love, since they're imprisoned in a bronze statue. Their Goth Girl Friday, Abby Normal, wants to be a bloodsucking fiend, too, but right now she's really busy with other stuff like Chet, who's getting bigger and smarter—and thirstier—by the minute.

Before you can say "OMG! WTF?" Tommy and Jody are sprung from captivity, and join forces with Abby and the entire crew to hunt big cat and save the city. And that's when the fun really begins.

Editorial Reviews

Publishers Weekly
A vampire cat is stalking San Francisco in Moore’s serviceable latest comic horror adventure (after You Suck), and the only humans who can take him down are goth girl Abby Normal and her brainiac boyfriend, Stephen “Foo Dog” Wong. They, in turn, call upon Abby’s masters, vampiric lovers Jody and Tommy, who were on the verge of breaking up until Abby decided to bronze them posed as Rodin’s The Kiss. Also in pursuit of the vampire cat and his minions are the Animals, the night stock crew at the Marina Safeway who hunt vampires in their spare time; a lunatic homeless man who calls himself the “Emperor of San Francisco”; a Japanese printmaker who wields a mean sword; and homicide detectives Rivera and Cavuto. Things become even more complicated with the arrival of three ancient vampires intent on getting some payback. The narrative could use trimming, and much of the humor seems recycled from Moore’s previous vampire tomes, though this won’t matter to the legions of fans who crave Moore’s trademark low horror and high camp. (Apr.)
Booklist
“Moore’s most hysterical ‘love story’ to date.”
More Reviews (7) Fewer Reviews
Bookreporter.com
“I can’t emphasize enough how funny BITE ME is.”
Edmonton Journal
“Moore’s twisted take on the undead comes as a welcome respite from the recent spate of TV, film and book offerings to bombard us.”
Edmonton Journal on BITE ME
“Moore’s twisted take on the undead comes as a welcome respite from the recent spate of TV, film and book offerings to bombard us.”
Florida Times-Union
“Moore carved a niche in the horror-comedy genre, and anyone with a fiendish sense of humor will love his writing.”
Florida Times-Union on BITE ME
“Moore carved a niche in the horror-comedy genre, and anyone with a fiendish sense of humor will love his writing.”
Ottawa Citizen
“Moore proves he has few rivals on the humour-opus front with this high-larious romp that just might have driven the final nail into old Nosferatu’s coffin.”
Ottawa Citizen on BITE ME
“Moore proves he has few rivals on the humour-opus front with this high-larious romp that just might have driven the final nail into old Nosferatu’s coffin.”

Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9780061779732
  • Publisher: HarperCollins Publishers
  • Publication date: 3/8/2011
  • Edition description: Reprint
  • Pages: 352
  • Sales rank: 75,203
  • Series: Bloodsucking Fiends Series , #3
  • Product dimensions: 5.20 (w) x 7.90 (h) x 1.00 (d)

Meet the Author

Christopher Moore
Christopher Moore

Christopher Moore is the author of twelve previous novels: Practical Demonkeeping, Coyote Blue, Bloodsucking Fiends, Island of the Sequined Love Nun, The Lust Lizard of Melancholy Cove, Lamb, Fluke, The Stupidest Angel, A Dirty Job, You Suck, Fool, and Bite Me. He lives in San Francisco, California.

Biography

A 100-year-old ex-seminarian and a demon set off together on a psychotic road trip...

Christ's wisecracking childhood pal is brought back from the dead to chronicle the Messiah's "missing years"...

A mild-mannered thrift shop owner takes a job harvesting souls for the Grim Reaper...

Whence come these wonderfully weird scenarios? From the fertile imagination of Christopher Moore, a cheerfully demented writer whose absurdist fiction has earned him comparisons to master satirists like Kurt Vonnegut, Terry Pratchett, and Douglas Adams.

Ever since his ingenious debut, 1992's Practical Demonkeeping, Moore has attracted an avid cult following. But, over the years, as his stories have become more multi-dimensional and his characters more morally complex, his fan base has expanded to include legions of enthusiastic general readers and appreciative critics.

Asked where his colorful characters come from, Moore points to his checkered job resume. Before becoming a writer, he worked at various times as a grocery clerk, an insurance broker, a waiter, a roofer, a photographer, and a DJ -- experiences he has mined for a veritable rogue's gallery of unforgettable fictional creations. Moreover, to the delight of hardcore fans, characters from one novel often resurface in another. For example, the lovesick teen vampires introduced in 1995's Bloodsucking Fiends are revived (literally) for the 2007 sequel You Suck -- which also incorporates plot points from 2006's A Dirty Job.

For a writer of satirical fantasy, Moore is a surprisingly scrupulous researcher. In pursuit of realistic details to ground his fiction, he has been known to immerse himself in marine biology, death rituals, Biblical scholarship, and Goth culture. He has been dubbed "the thinking man's Dave Barry" by none other than The Onion, a publication with a particular appreciation of smart humor.

As for story ideas, Moore elaborates on his website: "Usually [they come] from something I read. It could be a single sentence in a magazine article that kicks off a whole book. Ideas are cheap and easy. Telling a good story once you get an idea is hard." Perhaps. But, to judge from his continued presence on the bestseller lists, Chris Moore appears to have mastered the art.

Good To Know

In researching his wild tales, Moore has done everything from taking excursions to the South Pacific to diving with whales. So what is left for the author to tackle? He says he'd like to try riding an elephant.

One of the most memorably weird moments in Moore's body of work is no fictional invention. The scene in Bloodsucking Fiendswhere the late-night crew of a grocery store bowls with frozen turkeys is based on Moore's own experiences bowling with frozen turkeys while working the late shift at a grocery store.

    1. Hometown:
      Hawaii and San Francisco, California
    1. Date of Birth:
      August 5, 1958
    2. Place of Birth:
      Toledo, Ohio
    1. Website:
      http://www.chrismoore.com

Customer Reviews

Average Rating 4
( 273 )

Rating Distribution

5 Star

(127)

4 Star

(93)

3 Star

(37)

2 Star

(6)

1 Star

(10)

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See All Sort by: Showing 1 – 20 of 274 Customer Reviews

  • Anonymous

    Posted May 6, 2010

    Not Your Typical Vampire Story

    This is a brilliant finale to Christopher Moore's hilarious vampire trilogy. Warning: do not read this somewhere you must remain quiet. I laughed out loud with every ridiculous twist and turn. I just love Moore's witty writing and laugh-out-loud humor.

    3 out of 3 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  NoThank you for your feedback.   Report this reviewThank you, this review has been flagged.

  • Posted March 18, 2010

    more from this reviewer

    This is a wild biting satire that takes no prisoners as a vampire cat wrecks havoc on the City by the bay

    The streets of San Francisco are not safe as a predatory vampire prowls them looking for prey. No one is safe from this feline. Perhaps the only humans who might end the biting cat's reign of terror are goth Abby Normal and her brilliant boyfriend, Stephen "Foo Dog" Wong although others like the Animals of Marina Safeway and the Emperor of San Francisco hunt the beast.

    Abby and Stephen visit her Masters, vampire couple Jody and Tommy to obtain their help and guidance. The pair owes Abby for keeping them together when she made them immortal with her rendition of The Kiss starring the vamps as the couple. As they work to stop the sharp toothed cat, the team runs into three visiting ancient vamps with teeth to grind, the other hunters and SFPD homicide detectives Rivera and Cavuto who want all of them off the streets of San Francisco so the cops can solve the case.

    This is a wild biting satire that takes no prisoners as a vampire cat wrecks havoc on the City by the bay. The story line is amusing and fast-paced but also contains too many cat lives that diverse from the prime plot of hunting the hunter who hunts those hunting it. Fans of the Normal acerbic paranormal tales (see After You Suck) will laugh out loud at Bite Me" A Love Story.

    Harriet Klausner

    3 out of 3 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted May 5, 2010

    Bite Me

    If you liked the move Zombieland, you will like this book. It is a different take on the vampire life, and will keep you laughing. I honestly picked this book up because it had such a unique looking cover. I was drawn into the story, and could not put it down until I had finished reading it. There was one draw back, I found out while I was reading this, that it was actually the third in this series. On the other hand this book, held up well in my opinion on its own. This is a book you could read without the others, but if you do read the other books it will increase the background of the book. If you are having a bad day this is the book to lift your spirts, and get you laughing again.

    2 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted December 25, 2011

    Funny

    I find the story really funny. It had me laughing so much. GREAT!!!

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted October 16, 2011

    Fun read

    Christopher Moore has a great sense of humor. I find him to be a little dark and sarcastic. I find this book laugh out loud funny.

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted June 6, 2011

    Not good

    I am a huge fan of Christopher Moore however this book is not good. I didn't even finish it. I couldn't stand how almost the whole thing was seen through Abbey's P.O.V. She is annoying and it's just too hard to read.

    1 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted May 26, 2010

    I Also Recommend:

    9780060590284 9780060590307 9780060566685

    Awesome book! 2 thumbs up

    Really good book. Will read again for sure. I love all of Christopher Moore's stuff. He is a talented writer and very entertaining.

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted May 16, 2012

    Reach to haze

    'Walks to next result'

    Was this review helpful? Yes  NoThank you for your feedback.   Report this reviewThank you, this review has been flagged.

  • Anonymous

    Posted May 16, 2012

    Hazes house

    Knock beyatches!!

    Was this review helpful? Yes  NoThank you for your feedback.   Report this reviewThank you, this review has been flagged.

  • Anonymous

    Posted April 3, 2012

    Fun

    Entertaining

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  • Anonymous

    Posted February 15, 2012

    Just crazy!

    One of Moore's best works, make sure to read the others first, this one is not to be missed.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted December 27, 2011

    I hate it, worst book ever, sorry its just my opinion

    I dont like it and i hope he doesnt write another one sorry

    0 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted November 17, 2011

    Bitetastic

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  • Anonymous

    Posted July 10, 2011

    Best series EVER

    I loved blood sucking fiends. Then I loved you suck. But I LOVE Bite me. Best one yet.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted June 29, 2011

    Highly Recommend!

    Christopher Moore is a genious. He blends horror with extreme laughter and the characters are so well written you cheer for them, cry for them, laugh at them and feel as if you know them.

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  • Posted May 14, 2011

    Great book

    No text was provided for this review.

  • Posted May 11, 2011

    Idk

    I dont know if i should read this book

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  • Anonymous

    Posted March 28, 2011

    Awesome!

    love this book!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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  • Posted March 13, 2011

    PEANUTS AND ORANGES!

    MY RAINBOW BUNNY TOLD ME TO LOOK IN TO THE SKY, WISH ON A BLACK UNICORN AND A MAGIC BANNA WILL APPEAR IN MY POCKET!!

    0 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted January 20, 2011

    Another Homerun

    Once again, I am satisfied.

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