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Tommy Cordain was depressed. He knew he shouldnâ€™t be, but for the life of him he just couldnâ€™t shake the feeling of despondency heâ€™d woken up with, and now couldnâ€™t dispel.
"Damn it," he muttered, pouring himself the third cup of coffee of the morning. His mood might have been lighter if his lover, Andrew BerÃ©s, was there with him, but Andrew wouldnâ€™t be up and about until later in the dayâ€”and therein lay the problemâ€”or at least, one of the problems.
Since Andrew had left New York and moved in with Tommy their relationship had grown stronger than Tommy had ever dreamed it would. Heâ€™d never been in a monogamous relationship before, had never felt like committing himself to only one person, until he met Andrew. And Tommy had never been happier.
So what was the problem?
Andrew was a vampire.
But that wasnâ€™t the problem. Well, if Tommy was really honest with himself, hell yeah, it was the problem. Because, until Andrew had come into his life, Tommy had been okay with the prospect of growing older. Not that heâ€™d really thought about it that much. His parents were older, and they still enjoyed an active life, taking trips, even going line dancing every week. Somewhere in the back of his mind heâ€™d figured that when he was their age, late fifties, heâ€™d probably still be going to the gym, take the occasional hiking trip, go swimming, jogging, all the things he did now. Heâ€™d look older, but that didnâ€™t matter, did it?
Well yes, it kinda does, â€™cause Andrew wonâ€™t look olderâ€”will never look older.
Andrew would always look like he was in his mid-twenties, the age heâ€™d been when he was changedâ€”younger than Tommy was now. Andrew was over two-hundred years old, yet sometimes Tommy felt older than him, and in reality, at twenty-nine, he was. Andrew had told him that with regular infusions of vampire blood, he would age much more slowly than a normal humanâ€”he might even live to be a hundred, perhaps a hundred and fifty years old without much change in his physical appearance. And in the ecstasy of their love making after Tommy had discovered what Andrew really was, all of that had seemed just fineâ€”fantastic evenâ€”but now, he wasnâ€™t so sure.
Tommy had been drained almost to the point of death by Lazlo Marek, Andrewâ€™s devious uncle, and heâ€™d been saved by drinking Andrewâ€™s powerful blood. That rich essence had already added several years to Tommyâ€™s life, something heâ€™d thought incredible at the time, but now, it didnâ€™t feel right.
What about his parents, his friends, those he would lose over the yearsâ€”and wouldnâ€™t they at some point wonder why they were aging and he was not? How could he explain that away? There was also the fact that Andrew couldnâ€™t meet any of his buddies for lunch, couldnâ€™t go to the ballpark with him, couldnâ€™t go for a swim in the ocean, unless it was a moonlight swim.
And those were definitely great. The two of them under a starlit sky, swimming out as far as they could, then floating in each otherâ€™s arms, buffeted by gently rolling waves. Sometimes Andrew would hold him and they would skim over the surface of the ocean, locked in an embrace, their naked bodies fused as one. Oh God, yeah, the sex was always the best. Each and every time better than the time before, if that was possible. Andrew was beautiful, his body perfect in every way, his face one that any artist would long to capture on canvas, his hair like black silk, his eyesâ€¦
Yeah, heâ€™s the hottest guy Iâ€™ve ever been with. Iâ€™m so damned lucky to have him in my life, but I canâ€™t overlook the fact that one day heâ€™s going to leave me behind.
Tommy wasnâ€™t arrogant, but he knew he was no slouch in the looks department. Heâ€™d been told numerous times he was hot. He kept his quarterback physique in shape with regular workoutsâ€”the rigours of his job as a firefighter demanded he be at his best, physically and mentally at all times. Yet he knew the day would come eventually when all that would fade.
Iâ€™ll become baggy and saggy and my vampire boyfriend will start lookinâ€™ around for the young and the hungâ€¦
The sudden call from the bedroom made him jump. Andrew was awake?
"Whatâ€™s wrong?" he asked, pushing the bedroom door open. "Did I wake you?"
"Yes. Your anxious thoughts entered my consciousness. Come sit by me."
Tommy walked quickly through the darkened room and sat on the edge of their bed. "Sorry," he mumbled.
Andrew reached up and cupped Tommyâ€™s face with a cool hand. As always, Andrewâ€™s touch induced a shiver of ecstasy in Tommy and he turned his face into Andrewâ€™s palm and kissed it gently.
"Sorry I woke you."