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Product Details
| ISBN-13: | 9781466989351 |
|---|---|
| Publisher: | Trafford Publishing |
| Publication date: | 04/30/2013 |
| Sold by: | Barnes & Noble |
| Format: | eBook |
| Pages: | 236 |
| File size: | 18 MB |
| Note: | This product may take a few minutes to download. |
About the Author
Read an Excerpt
Blossoms, Blooms and Scenes
By Bill Davis, Charles Hays
Trafford Publishing
Copyright © 2013 Bill Davis And Charles HaysAll rights reserved.
ISBN: 978-1-4669-8936-8
Excerpt
CHAPTER 1
TULIPIA GESNERIANA TULIPS OF SLIGHTLY DIFFERENT AGES
This stunning flower is a perennial favorite that features 109 different species and they each belong to the Family known as Liliaceae. They are prominent from Western Europe to the highlands of China. And, hybrid cultivars are grown in gardens or potted plants. If compared to our own species, they would have to be likened to our attractive females, not our ugly men. And, if you listen to them on a day of no ill wind, you can almost hear them whisper, "I don't like that one with variegated colors. She's got the tulip breaking virus and I am highly susceptible to TBV. Let's close up our pedals and maybe she won't notice us."
MORAL: Never catch a dreaded virus.
LILIACEAE A VARIEGATED MARTAGON LILY
Here, we have a lovely example of the variegated lily, also known as the 'Turk's cap lily'. At least, that's what you call it when you are not too sure of your classification skills. Sometimes, I prefer to call this one what my father said it was. He would take one look at my favorite lily and quickly say something of this order, "That flower is too pretty to buy. If we take it home, Mom will just kill it by forgetting to water it." Or, he would say, "We can't buy that flower, it's priced for one of two richer families in town, maybe, the Gorman's or the Daniels's.
MORAL: Never buy a banker's favorite flower.
GARDEN PEPPERS (Mixed Variety) RED AND YELLOW TYPE
Poets say that opposites attract and likes repel. I saw that in my marriage with my dear departed Dorothy. We were as different as two people could be yet we forged a marriage that lasted fifty-four splendid years. And, this is another observation of the good life for the world around us. Racism seems to appear in all breeds or varieties. I can just barely decipher what the 'red pepper' is saying to the 'yellow pepper'. "Boy, don't you turn your back to me. That's just plain insolent and I won't stand for it" To which the 'yellow pepper' said in response, "Screw you, you damned communist!"
MORAL: Why can't all of us 'peppers' learn to live together?
EASTER LILY WHITE LILY
The White Lily speaks to us men of purism and, moreover, virginity. When some young girls are given these elegant flowers, they blush and try to hide their faces. Others, who are more bolder, just smile and say 'thank you' before taking their designated beaus into the nearby bushes. I was never a great fan of bushes and barbs but, I did enjoy kissing and hugging on a large piece of sandstone that was covered by a large love blanket. And, that's a good description of how my Father met my Mother.
MORAL: Live a good life and save your money and maybe, someday, they will name a TV Show after you, as they did for my Father and my Mother.
AN UMBRELLA TOADSTOOL OR A MUSHROOM?
TOADSTOOLS or MUSHROOMS, that is the question. Whether it is nobler to die unnoticed and unseen, the photographers will always love us because we are rigid and we never bend in the breeze. But, please warn your children that some of us are poisonous. And, dear Mothers, our fondest hope is to harm no child. So, please consider yourselves as being properly forewarned. However, we are God's secret weapon against all lawyers. Since Lawyers are not allowed to pass St. Peter's Golden Gate, feed them toadstools and hope for the best. One of our purposes in life is to observe which attorneys will proceed toward the wicked one down below.
MORAL: Don't become an ambulance chaser.
LILIACEAE A YELLOW CALLA LILY
What do you call a Calla? To me it might be referred to as a malformed lily. I asked artist Bill Davis if he had messed with this lily and he said, "No, I didn't, Charley. That's the way it looks right off of the showroom floor. It does look as though this lily got funnelized or was crumpled into the shape of a tiny funnel. Or perhaps it is, in reality, a very small cup with a pouring spout." I told Bill that, like everything else, nothing is completely perfect. But, there is one thing that stands out from all the rest, And, that's its coloring which is a most beautiful shade of yellow.
MORAL: Never judge a yellow lily by its shape. It is the yellow that defines its eternal existence in God's kingdom of flowers.
A SUCCULENT PLANT GROWING THROUGH THE SIDE OF A POT
The radiating leaves of this succulent plant are a picture-perfect example of both symmetry and sameness which combine to form a distinct loveliness. A wise man once said that, if you look for beauty, you will find it. If you don't bother to search for the unseen then you won't see enough. If you don't see something beautiful each day then that defines a day that is still unfulfilled. And, imagine how the plants might feel if you walk right by them and leave them unnoticed. Try that on your wife or significant other and you may find yourself all alone.
MORAL: Look, listen and perceive to be more alive.
SUCCULENT LEAF WITH A SMALL RED FLOWER
In any collection of pictures, there is always one that defies appropriate identification. And, for this picture book, this is the one whose proper classification avoids both Davis and I. This cute little bloom is an attractive wonder of nature but it is also one that reminds me of Greta Garbo, the famous Swedish actress who said, "I want to be left alone." And, it appears that my little red flower feels the same way because 'my little red' is giving out no interviews at this day or time.
MORAL: If something or somebody wants complete privacy and prefers to be remain as a face in the crowd, we should be kind and let them be.
A RED ASIATIC LILY
In this view, we offer another classic demonstration of the outstanding appeal that the lily offers to any viewer. This is the maroon lily that is so popular among the Universities that wear the colors of maroon in their athletic uniforms; for example, at Texas A&M Adversity, the coed's favorite flower is the maroon lily. At homecoming games, you see more lilies than mums these days. So, Aggies, cast away the old traditions, lilies are in and mums are out.
I gave her a lily and asked for a kiss, And, it was pure bliss. Until I discovered that I had missed her lips, And, she said, that'll be the end of this courtship. I gave it the old college try, Yet, I was not allowed to touch her thigh. So, now I am without a gal, Can you hook me up with one, old pal?
MORAL: Aim for the lips if you want to play with her hips.
A WILD PRAIRIE ROSE WITH AN UNINVITED BEETLE
A rare combination of events is here apparent. Cross-pollination by a small beetle is evident and a beautiful purple flower is to be enjoyed by all you observers.. The five leaves and a glorious amount of pollen lead me to think that we might be looking at a wild Prairie Rose. My father used to sing a related chant.
"My Wild Prairie Rose, The sweetest and dearest flower that grows, It helps me to deal with my daily woes."
MORAL: Never mess with a flower that has such power.
LILIACEAE AN ORANGE TIGER LILY
Here is another prime illustration of a beautiful lily. If this flower could talk, it might say something like this, "Look at me, I am extraordinary and you are, at best, only ordinary. Learn from me. Try to be better. Try to look better. Try to be smarter. I put on my best makeup and my best costume for you and you walked by without even noticing me! I could place a curse upon you and then you would be more than repaid for ignoring my countless attributes. Wake up, man. The grim reaper is just around the corner and he is headed your way. And all because you didn't bother to notice me or my friends."
MORAL: Look right, look left then look right again. And, if you do this, you will find more of Mother Nature's best.
LILIACEAE A RED ASIATIC LILY
A lovely something that's what this is. I don't know its precise name but, that's all right because it doesn't know mine.
So who are you and what is your name, Are you staking a claim for fame? Or, am I at a loss for words, Like gizzards and goatherds? I may be old and I am certainly slow, But, give me an hour and I will know. So, don't suggest that I am over the hill. Or, one of us will soon be ill. I'll meet you at the old grist mill, And, we'll see which one is the shill.
MORAL: Don't worry about names too much. A rose by another name is still a rose, isn't it?
APRIL SHOWERS BRING SPRING FLOWERS
Winter would be a lot more pleasant if the spring flowers that grow in May could extend their season to include December through March. But, I can't blame them for their preference to April showers. Moisture from snow is not enough for them to reach their maximum glow. And, then, there is that wicked demon called ice. Perhaps, we need to keep things as they are instead of trying to change them with our 'what-if" philosophies. If refraining makes the heart fonder for lovers, then patience makes the spring flowers appear more beautiful.
MORAL: Though, it is now winter, take notice. Spring is not that far away.
CENTAUREA MOUNTAIN BLUET
This flower is a genus of more than 600 species that are found only north of the equator. Thus, they qualify as the thistle-like Yankees of the Western hemisphere. They are identified by many names; asters, centaury, century, star thistles, knapweeds, centaureas, bluets, loggerheads, basketflowers, and cornflowers. Their family name is known as the Asteraceae. If this is too much for the mind to absorb, don't feel badly because there is much to learn about this flower. In my opinion, their greatest service to mankind is that they are popular food for insects that attack the crops of farmers. So around a lot of vegetables, these plants are planted to sacrifice themselves for the sake of the vegetables. In other words, the insects that prefer crops actually prefer the bluets as a selective delicacy over the crops. In this way, the crops are saved.
MORAL: Never misjudge a weed, because many of them have a higher purpose that you cannot easily imagine.
CLEMATIS FLOWER AND TWO HYACINTH BEAN PODS
This picture summarizes the life span of a flower in terms of its beginning and its climax. The beautiful blue Clematis is a member of the buttercup family known as the Ranunculaceae and there are, at least 300 known species. Other names for this particular beauty include, traveller's joy, virgin bower, old man's beard, leather flower, vase vine and pepper vine. But, what's in a name if the Clematis is in the game? The Clematis species are found mainly throughout the temperate regions of the northern hemisphere and very rarely are they seen in the tropical zones. I love buttercups but I didn't know that they could be so good-looking.
MORAL: Beauty is where you least expect to find it and that's one good reason that flowers are appreciated so much.
WILD FERNS AS SEEN FROM ABOVE
My Mother used to get quite disturbed over the phase, 'only the gifted can raise ferns'. She would buy healthy ferns at the different stores and she would try her best but they would soon die and disappoint her to the highest degree. She would always ask, "How can they do so well in the forest and so poorly in my house?" I told her that the secret was called water plus humus, a brown or black material resulting from partial decomposition of plant or animal matter and containing the organic component of soil. Then she would look and me and wonder, "What manner of man am I rearing in this house?" Nowadays, I can throw some humus around my oak trees and when I plant the ferns in the middle of that mess, happily, I achieve remarkable success.
MORAL: Listen to your Mother only if she is correct and don't try to drown your ferns.
LILIACEAE A VARIEGATED CALLA LILY
Here, we have another outstanding presentation of a Calla lily, this illustration being of the variegated type.
I don't know which Lily, Is the best cutie. Whether it's the one that's yellow, Or the other that's more mellow. It's really hard to choose, I like the one that has more hues. And, if you don't agree with my choice, None will lose and we both will rejoice. Because where Callies are concerned, No one is ever to be downturned.
MORAL: Splendor is as Lilies are.
A BEAUTIFUL RED ROSE
Poets have moaned for years that a rose is built just for the nose to enjoy but that is not enough to say about one of God's greatest creations. Instead, I would add that a rose is one of the most gorgeous designs that one will ever perceive. My Mother loved them more than anyone else I know. She would grow them in the back yard exactly where dad wanted to plant onions but she always won that argument. She would say, "Not everything should be about the stomach. Instead, some things should be about the eye."
MORAL: Onions are cheap but tasty. Roses are not edible but they are very enjoyable.
LILIACEAE A YELLOW ASIATIC
Some say that yellow is a sign which means to linger and wait until the light goes green. Which suggest both caution and forbearance. I have always been somewhat eager to see what lies behind the next mountain so this is the wisdom of what I have to say about the lovely yellow lily. You can search but you won't find anything more attractive than this lovely lily. You can hunt for a bigger, better flower but none will exist. You can explore the hills and valleys galore but no flower that grows will ever match this majesty. You can pursue an almighty quest all over the World but none can be better than this.
MORAL: Why look for something better when right there in your own flower garden, you have a yellow lily. Something more is sometimes something less.
LILIACEAE A PINK ORIENTAL LILY
When I evaluate my thoughts about a pink and white lily mixture, I think about women and their panties. Yes, I really do. They wear pink undergarments don't they? And, my women are always white so what's the point? I can't help it because I am doomed in this manner. For reasons that I do not understand, women are always on my mind, along with these lovely flowers, the pink and white variety. We men ought to have a pink and white lily flag to wave from our cars to tell every nice lady that passes this important message, I'm free and I am over twenty one. Won't someone please adopt me?
MORAL: If you can't fly a pink and white lily flag, then don't complain to me. If you don't seek, then you will never find.
LILIACEAE THE ORANGE VARIETY
And what says you about the orange variety? Does it make you thirsty for juice or hungry for some citrus fruit? But, I know that it can't involve women and their underwear. I have never seen a girl with orange skin or black spots covering her family jewel, the vagina. The black spots could be tattoos but, trust me, there has never been an orange vagina, at least none that I know about. I'll tell you what this picture means to me.
I think that I shall never see, A poem as lovely as a Lily. And, when it is orange, It's telling me to take the plunge. Buy a flag and wave it all you want, She'll tell you to go to Vermont. Add a telephone number to your flag, And, maybe, she might become your nag.
MORAL: Don't leave it to chance. You have to work to find a true romance.
A WILD PRAIRIE ROSE AND A TREE TRUNK FOR HUMUS
What is it that they say about successful Italian restaurants? They say that everything depends on location, location and location. Well, in one sense, they say the same thing about wildflowers and their livelihood. If you want to bloom for many, many long years, find a spot near a tree where there's plenty of humus, humus and more humus. Out in the open is stupid when it's all about food and survival. So, long live the trees because Charley wants his wildflowers to grow and prosper.
MORAL: For some of the things that grow on the Earth, humus means more than water, especially if it is moist humus. And, of course, we always have a catalyst named condensation.
(Continues...)
Excerpted from Blossoms, Blooms and Scenes by Bill Davis. Copyright © 2013 by Bill Davis And Charles Hays. Excerpted by permission of Trafford Publishing.
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