Nice Girls Don't Get the Corner Office: 101 Unconscious Mistakes Women Make That Sabotage Their Careers / Edition 1by Lois P. Frankel
Pub. Date: 01/15/2004
Publisher: Grand Central Publishing
In this runaway bestseller, internationally recognized executive coach Lois P. Frankel reveals a distinctive set of behaviors-101 in all-that women learn in girlhood that ultimately sabotage them as adults. She shows you how to eliminate them and offers invaluable coaching tips you'll easily be able to incorporate into your social and business skills. The results… See more details below
In this runaway bestseller, internationally recognized executive coach Lois P. Frankel reveals a distinctive set of behaviors-101 in all-that women learn in girlhood that ultimately sabotage them as adults. She shows you how to eliminate them and offers invaluable coaching tips you'll easily be able to incorporate into your social and business skills. The results will pay off in career opportunities you never thought possible-and in an image that identifies you as someone with the power and know-how to occupy the corner office.
Discover these and other business pitfalls:
Mistake #3: Working too hard. The truth is, no one is ever promoted purely because of hard work.
Mistake #26: Decorating your office like your living room. Unless you're an interior decorator, it doesn't pay.
Mistake #27: Feeding others. You're not "Mom" or Betty Crocker.
Mistake #59: Asking permission. Children, not adults, ask for approval. Be direct, be confident.
Mistake #73: Smiling inappropriately. Make your demeanor fit the situation.
- Grand Central Publishing
- Publication date:
- Edition description:
- New Edition
Table of Contents
Chapter 1 Getting Started 1
Chapter 2 How You Play the Game 19
1 Pretending It Isn't a Game 20
2 Playing the Game Safely and within Bounds 22
3 Working Hard 24
4 Doing the Work of Others 26
5 Working without a Break 28
6 Being Naive 30
7 Pinching Company Pennies 32
8 Waiting to Be Given What You Want 34
9 Avoiding Office Politics 38
10 Being the Conscience 40
11 Protecting Jerks 44
12 Holding Your Tongue 46
13 Failing to Capitalize on Relationships 48
14 Not Understanding the Needs of Your Constituents 50
Chapter 3 How You Act 53
15 Polling Before Making a Decision 54
16 Needing to Be Liked 56
17 Not Needing to Be Liked 58
18 Not Asking Questions for Fear of Sounding Stupid 60
19 Acting Like a Man 62
20 Telling the Whole Truth and Nothing but the Truth (So Help You God) 65
21 Sharing Too Much Personal Information 68
22 Being Overly Concerned with Offending Others 70
23 Denying the Importance of Money 72
24 Flirting 74
25 Acquiescing to Bullies 76
26 Decorating Your Office Like Your Living Room 78
27 Feeding Others 80
28 Offering a Limp Handshake 82
29 Being Financially Insecure 84
30 Helping 87
Chapter 4 How You Think 89
31 Making Miracles 90
32 Taking Full Responsibility 92
33 Obediently Following Instructions 94
34 Viewing Men in Authority as Father Figures 96
35 Limiting Your Possibilities 98
36 Ignoring the Quid Pro Quo 102
37 Skipping Meetings 104
38 Putting Work Ahead of Your Personal Life 106
39 Letting People Waste Your Time 108
40 Prematurely Abandoning Your Career Goals 110
41 Ignoring the Importance of Network Relationships 113
42 Refusing Perks 116
43 Making Up Negative Stories 118
44 Striving for Perfection 120
Chapter 5 How You Brand and Market Yourself 123
45 Failing to Define Your Brand 124
46 Minimizing Your Work or Position 126
47 Using Only Your Nickname or First Name 128
48 Waiting to Be Noticed 130
49 Refusing High-Profile Assignments 132
50 Being Modest 134
51 Staying in Your Safety Zone 136
52 Giving Away Your Ideas 138
53 Working in Stereotypical Roles or Departments 140
54 Ignoring Feedback 142
55 Being Invisible 144
Chapter 6 How You Sound 147
56 Couching Statements as Questions 148
57 Using Preambles 150
58 Explaining 152
59 Asking Permission 154
60 Apologizing 156
61 Using Minimizing Words 158
62 Using Qualifiers 160
63 Not Answering the Question 162
64 Talking Too Fast 164
65 The Inability to Speak the Language of Your Business 166
66 Using Nonwords 168
67 Using Touchy-Feely Language 170
68 The Sandwich 172
69 Speaking Softly 176
70 Speaking at a Higher-than-Natural Pitch 178
71 Trailing Voice Mails 180
72 Failing to Pause or Reflect Before Responding 182
Chapter 7 How You Look 185
73 Smiling Inappropriately 186
74 Taking Up Too Little Space 188
75 Using Gestures Inconsistent with Your Message 190
76 Being Over- or Underanimated 192
77 Tilting Your Head 194
78 Wearing Inappropriate Makeup 196
79 Wearing the Wrong Hairstyle 198
80 Dressing Inappropriately 200
81 Sitting on Your Foot 202
82 Grooming in Public 204
83 Sitting in Meetings with Your Hands under the Table 206
84 Wearing Your Reading Glasses around Your Neck 208
85 Accessorizing Too Much 210
86 Failing to Maintain Eye Contact 212
Chapter 8 How You Respond 215
87 Internalizing Messages 216
88 Believing Others Know More than You 219
89 Taking Notes, Getting Coffee, and Making Copies 222
90 Tolerating Inappropriate Behavior 224
91 Exhibiting Too Much Patience 228
92 Accepting Dead-End Assignments 230
93 Putting the Needs of Others Before Your Own 232
94 Denying Your Power 234
95 Allowing Yourself to Be the Scapegoat 237
96 Accepting the Fait Accompli 239
97 Permitting Others' Mistakes to Inconvenience You 242
98 Being the Last to Speak 244
99 Playing the Gender Card 246
100 Tolerating Sexual Harassment 249
101 Crying 251
Appendix Personal Development Planning and Resources 255
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews
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Nice Girls Don't Get the Corner Office 101 by Lois P. Frankel is a book that all women should receive upon graduation from college. It is amazing what we, the female gender, do to undermine ourselves without realizing it. Many of us, who come from homes that were supportive and definitely didn't pigeonhold us into the subservient female role, would never imagine how much we have picked up from the social cues and trends around us. Though, until recently, I would have not realized that I suffered from "nice girl syndrome", nor would I have connected it to ill health in my professional (or personal) life for that matter, I have now received a shocking education. Like jumping into a lake much colder than the tepid waters you were expecting, Nice Girls startles you with realization, while you emerge more refreshed because of it. If Nice Girls was a friend, it would be the one who says, "yes, you really do look fat in that outfit, but here's another that will accentuate what a wonderful body you actually have." See, it is not mean; it is truthful with gems of coaching advice. Frankel does not leave you hanging; she will tell you outright how you are shooting yourself in the foot, but then she will remove the gun from your hand and replace it with bandages and antiseptic. I have borrowed this one from the public library, but will be adding it my personal library. This is too valuable of a resource to not own and be able to refer back to until these life changing tips become healthy habits. As we change and grow our areas that we reference to in this book will also change, and I would like to have the ability to take and retake the questionnaire, that guides you through the book, as often as I like. Frankly, I'm not sure I know more than three or four women who don't need to read this book. (originally posted on www.coconutlibrary.typepad.com)
As a young 24 year old female working in a man's field, i originally thought this book was absurd and didnt apply in the least bit. Struggling to gain respect from the 10 men at least 10 years older than me that i supervised, i continued to troop through this book. I took the quiz as instructed, and followed the book as designed. I dont work in an office, so i was already discouraged. I worked on two suggestions a week, realizing that they did somehow pertain to me. Minor changes, how i stand, discipline of employees, showing sympathy, down to how i tie my hair, or packing away my cutesy earrings have lead me to great respect and success in an amazingly short time frame. It has also taught me how to interact more with pushy or angry customers and to keep control of the situation. Did i turn into macho butch chick? Absolutely not! Even practicing simple suggestions and watching peoples reactions is amazing. Ive suggested this book numerous times, bought it paper and ebook, and a year later still cruise through it. Its not a miracle worker, but great motivation and simple steps for a lady looking for success. You will have to apply the rules to your own life and atmosphere, remember the author is writing generally. I highly suggest this book! Make sure you read it as designed!
I loved this book b/c it really taught me something about myself and what makes me tick. It also really helped me figure out ways to work on my weaknesses.
I bought the book thinking it would have some 'new' information. It didn't. Mostly common sense things - like don't share personal info at work. In all honesty, I have not finished the book. However, I will because I don't like to waste money. I suggest getting it from your library first and then if you really like it buy the book. Otherwise, don't waste your money.
This book hit the nail on the head! I bought this book as a 'just in case' guide to be sure I wasn't acting any way I shouldn't. I felt I had respect from my male peers, but not enough. I started reading this book, thinking, 'I certainly do not do any of these things! I'm not a typical woman.' But sure enough, she hit on some points that I found myself guilty of. I believe there is not one woman out there who could not benefit from at least one of her rules. It has changed my work career and state of mind drastically! It's a career-saver.
This is a great read. I was able to apply so many things to my own life.
I bought the audio bundle of this product, which includes "Nice Girls don´t get the corner office", which I found substantial, and "Nice Girls don´t get Rich", which was totally a waste of time, as the author is not a financial advisor and the content was full of common sense and fillers. I do reccomend Nice Girls don´t get the corner office for everyone, even high schoolers. It is a must read for the ones entering the workfore or the ones are not satisfied with their career success.
I saw all the positive reviews for this book and thought "why not give it a shot?". I did not buy it for myself but for my wife who is a corporate attorney. She loved it. Along the same lines, I also suggest another book titled "The Career Journey" by author Ram Iyer. For some reason, that book is not listed here but I ordered from Amazon. It is really one cool book with a lot of practical suggestions and tips on how to excel at your current work environment and rise up the corporate ladder. Unlike this book that is more tailored for female, "The Career Journey" is more unisex and much more practical.
Excellent ideas,easy read. Every girl in her early twenties should read this before getting her first job in the big world. It is so true and would save a lot grief by breaking these bad habits early! Really liked it wish I had read it 20 yrs ago.
Great tips on real life business situations and the attitudes that women can bring to the table unknowningly. A confidence builder.
This book has been so helpful in my personal and business life that I purchased multiple copies to give out to my female family and friends.
This book was an excellent read, one every woman, no matter her success level, can gain insight and value from. This would be a book, however, that one may need to reference or skim through again- for every advice or tip can't be memorized. I am a young woman in her early 20s just starting her career, and I am glad I bought this book now and not later.
Greatest advice ever,period.