Love Online: Emotions on the Internet

Love Online: Emotions on the Internet

by Aaron Ben-Ze'ev
     
 

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ISBN-10: 0521832969

ISBN-13: 9780521832960

Pub. Date: 12/31/2003

Publisher: Cambridge University Press

Computers have changed not just the way we work but the way we love. Falling in and out of love, flirting, cheating, even having sex online have all become part of the modern way of living and loving. Yet we know very little about these new types of relationship. How is an online affair where the two people involved may never see or meet each other different from an

Overview

Computers have changed not just the way we work but the way we love. Falling in and out of love, flirting, cheating, even having sex online have all become part of the modern way of living and loving. Yet we know very little about these new types of relationship. How is an online affair where the two people involved may never see or meet each other different from an affair in the real world? Is online sex still cheating on your partner? Why do people tell complete strangers their most intimate secrets? What are the rules of engagement? Will online affairs change the monogamous nature of romantic relationships? These are just some of the questions Professor Aaron Ben Ze'ev, distinguished writer and academic, addresses in the first full length study of Love Online. Accessible, shocking, entertaining, enlightening, this book will change the way you look at cyberspace and love forever.

Product Details

ISBN-13:
9780521832960
Publisher:
Cambridge University Press
Publication date:
12/31/2003
Edition description:
New Edition
Pages:
302
Product dimensions:
5.43(w) x 8.50(h) x 0.98(d)

Table of Contents

Prefacexi
1The seductive space1
The interactive revolution in imagination1
Cyberlove and cybersex4
Letter, telegraph, and telephone7
Mobile texting14
The egalitarian space16
The lure of the Net18
The risky space20
Summary23
2The paradoxical nature of online relationships26
Detached attachment26
Distance and immediacy27
Lean and rich communication30
Anonymity and self-disclosure34
Sincerity and deception42
Continuity and discontinuity46
Physical and mental investment49
Distant relationships51
Summary55
3Emotions on the Net58
The typical cause of emotion: A perceived significant change58
The typical emotional concern: A comparative personal concern60
Typical characteristics and components63
Emotional intensity66
Emotions and intelligence70
Netiquette73
Summary76
4Online imagination78
Emotions and imagination78
The reality of online imagination80
Exciting information83
The reality of romantic and sexual imagination86
Dangers of online imagination88
Regret and online affairs91
Summary93
5Online privacy and emotional closeness95
Privacy: Initial distinctions96
Types of privacy97
Privacy, emotional closeness, and openness100
Online closeness102
Online openness106
Emotional pretense and sexual harassment108
The transparent society111
Shame in cyberspace114
Summary118
6Is it worth it?120
Extrinsically and intrinsically valuable activities120
Love and sex123
Happiness126
Types of online intimate activities129
Types of activities involved in cybersex131
The incomplete nature of online affairs133
Summary143
7Flirting on- offline145
Online conversations145
Online affairs as flirting149
The rules for online dating152
The formation of online affairs155
Summary159
8Cyberlove160
Attractiveness and praiseworthiness160
Seeing with your heart166
Online attraction169
Love at first chat175
Availability and effort177
The exclusivity of cyberlove181
Online intimacy and commitment188
Online rejection192
Gender differences193
Summary197
9Chatting is sometimes cheating199
The morality of imagination199
Chatting about sex202
Casual sex, adultery, and infidelity205
The morality of online affairs208
Cybersex with software216
The risks and prospects of online affairs217
Summary221
10The future of romantic relationships223
Stability and change in romantic relationships223
The marriage paradox227
Proclaimed monogamy with clandestine adultery230
Cohabitation and online affairs232
Whetting your appetite outside while eating at home236
Greater romantic flexibility242
Concluding remarks246
Notes249
Bibliography264
Index275

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