"The clearest and easily the best popular book of them all."
—Psychology Today.
In this enriching volume, Dr. Muriel James, co-author of Passion for Life: Psychology and the Human Spirit, and Dr. Dorothy Jongeward, show that every person has the potential to be a winner: to be an authentic, alive, repsonsive, fulfilled human being. An imaginative guide for self-analysis, discovery and growth—complete with experiments and exercises you can do by yourself—Born to Win uses psychlogical insights to increase your awareness of the real power you have to direct your own life, to make decisions, to develop your own ethical system, to enhance the lives of others—and to understand that you were "Born To Win."
Born To Win 1. Winners And Losers
Winners Losers Tools for Change Frederick Perls and Gestalt Therapy Eric Berne and Transactional Analysis Summary Experiments and Exercises
Trait Checklist Winner/Loser Continuum Role-Playing an Inner Dialogue
2. An Overview Of Transactional Analysis
Introduction to Structural Analysis Development of Ego States Introduction to Analyzing Transactions The Games People Play Days of Decision Psychological Positions Sexuality and Psychological Positions Introduction to Script Analysis Summary Experiments and Exercises
Beginning to Know Your Ego States Your Ego States and Feelings Analyzing a Transaction Your O Kness (fantasy)
Your Sexual O Kness (fantasy)
3. The Human Hunger For Strokes And Time Structuring
Stroking Hunger Positive Stroking Discounting and Negative Stroking The Hunger for Structured Time Summary Experiments and Exercises
You and Touch You and Recognition You and Time Structuring Your Capacity for Intimacy
4. The Drama Of Life Scripts
Scripts Cultural Scripts Subcultural Scripts Family Scripts Psychological Scripts of an Individual How Scripting Occurs Scripts with a Curse Countercsripts Roles and Themes in Life Dramas Script Themes Script Roles and Themes in Greek Mythology Script Themes in Children's Stories Summary Experiments and Exercises
Cultural and Family Scripting Individual Script
Nonverbal Messages In Your Script · Verbal Messages In Your Script · Role Identification · On Stage · Life Stages · Cast Of Characters
5. Parenting And The Parent Ego State
The Parent Ego State Outward Expression of the Parent Ego State Inner influence of the Parent Ego State Nurturing Parent Prejudicial Parent The Incomplete Parent Ego State Reparenting Summary Experiments and Exercises
Your Parents as People
Money · Possessions · Crisis · Fun · Sex Roles · Family Meals · Appearance · Education · Work · Values · Speech Patterns · Listening Patterns · Script Themes And Roles · Parenting Practices
Your Parent's Attitudes How Are You Like Your Parents?
Your Inner Dialogue Your Parent Ego States Naikan Therapy (Japanese self-observation method)
6. Childhood And The Child Ego State
The Child Ego State The Natural Child The Little Professor The Adapted Child Shifts between the Natural and Adapted Child Activating the Child Ego State Summary Experiments and Exercises
Your Childhood Home Getting in Touch with Your Childhood The Child in You Now Fantasy Awareness Your Childhood Adaptations Loss of a Parent Your Little Professor You as a Natural Child
7. Personal And Sexual Identity
Names and Identity Identity through Play Childhood Psychological Games and Role Identity Sexual Identity Sexual Expression Summary Experiments and Exercises
Identity and Your Name Your Childhood Play Your Current Play Your Psychological Games Your Sexual Identity and Expression Your Sexual Feelings and Behavior Now
8. Stamp Collecting And Game Playing
Psychological Trading Stamps The Time of Redemption The Sweatshirt Message Games Played from the Child Ego State The "Yes, But" Game The "Let's You and Him Fight" Game The "See What You Made Me Do" Game The "Uproar" Game The "Courtroom" Game The "Cops and Robbers" Game Giving Up Games Summary Experiments and Exercises
Your Stamp Collection Integrating Old Feelings
Inadequacy · Helplessness · Perfection · Depression · Fear · Guilt · Anxiety · Anger · Resentment · Other Feelings
Tracing Old Feelings Your Sweatshirt Messages Script Check List
9. The Adult Ego State
The Bash Trap Phenomenon The Adult Ego State Ego State Boundaries Lax Ego Boundaries Rigid Ego Boundaries Contamination of the Adult Boundary Lesions The Adult as Executive of the Personality Placating Your Parent Pleasing the Child Activating and Strengthening the Adult Ego State Days of Despair Summary Experiments and Exercises
Deathbed Scene (fantasy)
Your Last Hour (fantasy)
Breaking Out of Your Bash Trap Examining Constant Parent, Constant Adult, and Constant Child Your Ego State Portrait Decontaminating Your Adult Learning from your Projections Learning from your Dreams Problem-Solving Technique
10. Autonomy And Adult Ethics
Awareness Spontaneity Intimacy The Integrated Adult Adult Feelings Adult Ethics Epilogue Experiments and Exercises
Your Adult Ethics Adult Questions on Your Life
Footnotes And References
Index
JCSponberg
Posted December 20, 2008
I Also Recommend:
I was going throught what they call a "Mid Live Crices" when I found this book. It was a light in the tunnel. Opened my eyes as to who, what, and where I was in relationship to who, what and where I wanted to be. Relationships are easier and better with knowlage of yourself and understanding yourself enables you to better understand others. <BR/>Highly recommended for those searching to find themselves.
1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.
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Posted March 16, 2008
The authors very effectively meld two dynamic treatment modalities in a manner that demystifies and provides the reader or therapist employable tools. I've found success using this book in small group and individual treatement over many years. Excellent book.
1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.
Was this review helpful? Yes NoThank you for your feedback. Report this reviewThank you, this review has been flagged.Anonymous
Posted March 3, 2004
We all behave in ways that mystify us. There are those times when we find ourselves hypercritical and judgmental, or profoundly nurturing, or consumed with anger far out of proportion to the provocation, or able to reason with insight and dispassion. From whence come these vastly different responses to the triggers of life? Born To Win provides a vivid and compelling journey through the emotional (ego) states that are invoked by life events. The authors conceptualize these emotional (ego) states through the hypothetical construct suggested by Eric Berne, M.D. (Games People Play). In the 'Parent' state, we are judgmental or nurturing; in the 'Adult' state, rational and analytical; in the 'Child' state, impulsive and playful or angry and hurt. The authors demonstrate how our emotional responses to life events arise out of these three ego states. Each state has an appropriate time and place. Often, however, our inappropriate or self-defeating emotional responses occur because we have been overprogrammed by aversive early life events to respond from one ego state when another would be far more adaptive. Recognizing the inappropriate ego state and making the transition to the more proper ego state vastly improves the quality of one's life (e.g., responding to constructive criticism as a rational Adult instead of as a petulant Child). We are all 'born to win' and can do so when we learn to respond to life events from the proper ego state. Born To Win is an invaluable contribution to the cause of mental health.
1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.
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Posted July 18, 2010
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Overview
"The clearest and easily the best popular book of them all."
—Psychology Today.
In this enriching volume, Dr. Muriel James, co-author of Passion for Life: Psychology and the Human Spirit, and Dr. Dorothy Jongeward, show that every person has the potential to be a winner: to be an authentic, alive, repsonsive, fulfilled human being. An imaginative guide for self-analysis, discovery and growth—complete with experiments and exercises you can do by yourself—Born to Win uses ...