Bound by BDSM: Unexpected Lessons for Building a Happier Life

by Alicia M. Walker, Arielle Kuperberg

Overview

Why are BDSM practitioners so happy? It turns out, BDSM isn't just about whips and chains.

With engaging stories and a warm, conversational tone, Bound by BDSM: Unexpected Lessons for Building a Happier Life reveals how BDSM practitioners use clear boundaries, enthusiastic consent, open dialogue, and a strong community to create fulfilling relationships and build richer, more intentional lives. Drawing on research from the largest scientific study of BDSM ever conducted, Alicia Walker and Arielle Kuperberg demonstrate that the BDSM community's approach to trust and vulnerability offers a valuable model for building intimacy and fostering authentic connections. BDSM also allows practitioners to exercise their creativity and break the mold - whether it comes to trying out new practices in the bedroom or bending ideas about gender.

Whether you're vanilla, kinky, or just here for the life advice, this book -packed with humor and insight-is a refreshingly open-minded guide to building stronger relationships, deeper intimacy, and a more intentional approach to connection.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9798881803032
Publisher:	Bloomsbury Publishing
Publication date:	08/07/2025
Sold by:	Barnes & Noble
Format:	eBook
Pages:	176
File size:	604 KB

About the Author

Alicia M. Walker is an associate professor of sociology at Missouri State University and the author of The Secret Life of the Cheating Wife: Power, Pragmatism, and Pleasure in Women's Infidelity and Chasing Masculinity: Men, Validation, and Infidelity. Her work has appeared in Redbook, CNN, New York Times, The Cut, Daily Mail, Bustle, Marie Claire, Cosmopolitan, Vice, Men's Health, USA Today, Psychology Today, The Independent, The Sun, The Guardian, The Globe and Mail, The Sun, and Business Insider.
Arielle Kuperberg is an associate professor of sociology at the University of Maryland, Baltimore County. Her research has been widely discussed in hundreds of media articles all over the world, including the New York Times, Fortune, Cosmopolitan, Time Magazine, Fox News, NBC, NPR, and The Atlantic.
Alicia M. Walker is an associate professor of sociology at Missouri State University and the author of The Secret Life of the Cheating Wife: Power, Pragmatism, and Pleasure in Women's Infidelity and Chasing Masculinity: Men, Validation, and Infidelity. Her work has appeared in Redbook, CNN, New York Times, The Cut, Daily Mail, Bustle, Marie Claire, Cosmopolitan, Vice, Men's Health, USA Today, Psychology Today, The Independent, The Sun, The Guardian, The Globe and Mail, The Sun, and Business Insider.
Arielle Kuperberg is an associate professor of sociology at the University of Maryland, Baltimore County. Her research has been widely discussed in hundreds of media articles all over the world, including the New York Times, Fortune, Cosmopolitan, Time Magazine, Fox News, NBC, NPR, and The Atlantic.

Table of Contents

Introduction
Chapter 1: Searching for a Home
Chapter 2: Sexual Fulfillment and Satisfying Relationships: The Kitchen of Happiness
Chapter 3: Identity: The Bedroom of Happiness (with closets)
Chapter 4: Relationships with Good Communication: The Dining Room of Happiness
Chapter 5: Freedom from Society's Expectations: The Basement of Happiness
Chapter 6: BDSM Community: The Living Room of Happiness
Conclusion: Coming Home
Bibliography

Editorial Reviews

Whether the heights of ecstasy or the depths of authenticity-whatever you crave-Bound by BDSM will inspire you to stretch your body, expand your mind, and reach for what you need.” —Lisa Wade, author of American Hookup: The Culture of Sex on Campus

“Even if you don't know anything about BDSM or don't have an interest in knowing anything about BDSM, there are valuable lessons and insights for anyone in any kind of relationship, romantic or not, in Alicia M. Walker and Arielle Kuperberg's well-researched, informative and engaging book.” —Vicki Larson, author of LATitude: How You Can Make a Live Apart Together Relationship Work

“Bound by BDSM is not just a book about kinky sex and it's how-to's, but a guide to leading a more fulfilling life. It details Walker's and Kuperberg's research into the private lives of actual BDSM practitioners and gives readers an inside look into what makes BDSM pleasurable and desirable. The book also warns of the dangers of not knowing how to do it well. Bound by BDSM is for anyone who wants to learn how to practice better communication and connection, and how these can lead to a more pleasurable and passionate relationship. This book was a fascinating and important read.” —Tammy Nelson, director of the Integrative Sex Therapy Institute and author of Open Monogamy: A Guide to Co-Creating Your Ideal Relationship Agreement

From the Publisher