Breaking the Pattern: The Five Principles You Need to Remodel Your Life

Overview

Ever get the sense that you're reliving the same events, arguments, and frustrations again and again? Does your relationship, job, or diet always begin full of hope, but, somehow, fail to work out in the end?

In Breaking the Pattern, Charles Stuart Platkin synthesizes years of research in psychology, motivation, success, and achievement into what he calls "The 5 Principles You Need to Remodel Your Life," helping readers to take action in those areas where they feel stuck or ...

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Overview

Ever get the sense that you're reliving the same events, arguments, and frustrations again and again? Does your relationship, job, or diet always begin full of hope, but, somehow, fail to work out in the end?

In Breaking the Pattern, Charles Stuart Platkin synthesizes years of research in psychology, motivation, success, and achievement into what he calls "The 5 Principles You Need to Remodel Your Life," helping readers to take action in those areas where they feel stuck or doomed to repeat negative past experiences. Through a series of self-reflective exercises, Platkin encourages readers to examine their successes and failures, identifying, analyzing, and finally breaking the very patterns that have kept them from realizing their dreams. By incorporating inspirational quotes and stories throughout the book, Platkin creates a positive, healing environment in which even the most self-doubting reader can gain the support and motivation necessary to begin to change his or her life for the better.

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What People Are Saying

Alan Manevitz
The book, Breaking the Pattern, provides an excellent synthesis of easy-to -use tactics and strategies that give an individual the resources to really effect change in his or her life. Breaking patterns is clearly the single most important factor in changing one's life. I would recommend this book to everyone—we all have patterns to break, and new ones to learn.
— Alan Manevitz, M.D., Clinical Psychiatrist and Professor of psychiartry at New York Weill Cornell Medical Center and Chairman of e-Shrinks
John Foreyt
The book, Breaking The Pattern, is an outstanding, practical, readable guide based on sound, tested behavioral principles. Highly recommended to anyone wanting to achieve their dreams.
— John Foreyt, Ph.D., Director, Behavioral Medicine Research Center, Baylor College of Medicine
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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9780971150300
  • Publisher: Red Mill Press
  • Publication date: 1/28/2002
  • Pages: 272
  • Product dimensions: 6.24 (w) x 9.34 (h) x 1.07 (d)

Meet the Author

Charles Stuart Platkin is one of the country's leading weight-loss advocates and an author whose syndicated health and fitness column, "The Diet Detective," appears in over 155 newspapers nationwide. He is the founder of Nutricise, the first program on the Internet in which registered dietitians counsel more than 80,000 individuals to help them lose weight and maintain weight loss. Platkin has appeared in such publications as Newsweek, Men's Health, and Fitness magazine, and on the Today show, The Early Show, CNN, and CNBC.
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Read an Excerpt

My wife and I were out biking one Saturday afternoon along the streets of Manhattan with cars weaving in and around us. Since it was quite dangerous, I was a bit worried about my wife. She’s not from New York and is a lot more trusting of local drivers in heavy traffic areas. As we were going through a green light, I thought I lost her. Momentarily caught off guard, I stopped short in the middle of the street and was thrown over the handlebars of my bike. A crowd gathered, and someone offered to call an ambulance. I was only slightly injured, but I was embarrassed, then angry.
Who could I blame?

Well, it really was my wife’s fault—wasn’t it? I mean, if I hadn’t been concerned about her welfare, and if she had kept up with me, then I wouldn’t have stopped short! Wow! Why not blame her?

While it’s clear that this minor accident was nobody’s fault but my own, it’s a classic example of how easy it is to avoid taking responsibility. I’m the only one responsible for my actions. I made a choice to be concerned for my wife’s well-being and my being pitched over the handlebars had nothing to do with her.

Taking responsibility

I know it sounds puzzling and familiar at the same time, yet it’s a concept that’s frequently forgotten or abused during the course of our lives. What the heck does it mean? It’s simply this: Control over your life doesn’t arise from dodging and avoiding difficulties, but instead from coping with the issues (minor and major) that come your way or that you create. Personal honesty, conflict, and struggle constantly force you to make decisions concerning who you are as a person, and these choices are powerful growing tools. The best way to prepare for them is to stay aware of your actions. Only then can you become more responsible—and the payoff is a more effective life. Responsibility is choice, free choice. It means being able to determine your destiny.

This Principle promises to change your notion of what it is to take responsibility for yourself. It will help you recognize and identify responsibility-avoiding behaviors and patterns in both your professional and personal life.
Defining Responsibility

Responsibility has gotten a bad rap. Too many of us associate it with punishment and blame, both negatives. Or you may associate responsibility with dreary lectures detailing your duties and see it solely as a burden. There is a moral dimension to responsibility, but that is only part of it. Think about the word. It contains the word "respond" and the word "ability." Responsibility is, therefore, the ability to respond. An event occurs, a relationship or business fails. You suffer a loss or a setback. How do you respond? Can you get over it? Can you get past it? Can you keep heart and soul together and remain compassionate? To respond ably, or to respond responsibly, you figure out what went wrong, and determine how you can fix it, and even incorporate the setback into a well-thought out plan of action.

You may not be fully responsible for every event in your life. Accidents do happen, both lucky and unlucky ones. But you are solely responsible for how you respond to those events, and how you allow those events to shape you. Many of your own patterns, which you are in control of, not luck or chance, bring you opportunity, success, and failure.

There are very specific ways you think of yourself and how you act and react, and for the purpose of clarification I’ve organized them into eight general "types" of people. Each "type" has its peculiar syntax, behavior, and stock phrases. By examining these types and how they experience themselves, you can probably find a description (in part or in whole) of where you fit in. The types are:

  • The Blamer
  • The Higher Authority
  • The Victim
  • The Excuse Maker
  • The Avoider
  • The Counter Puncher
  • The Ingratiator
  • The Martyr
........
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Sort by: Showing 1 Customer Reviews
  • Anonymous

    Posted January 8, 2002

    I Did It!!

    This is definitely one of the most inspirational books I've read in years-- it is the type of book that keeps you thinking even weeks after you've read it. The exercises helped me realize patterns I've had my whole life, and now the five principles are helping me to break those patterns. I feel like all my goals are finally within my reach!! I've been quoting it to my all my family and friends. It's perfect for anyone who wants to make a change for the better in their life...and isn't pratically everyone?! I can't recommend it enough!!! My whole life I have been wanting to make changes, but now, I finally am actually making those changes!

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