Bringing Metal to the Children: The Complete Berzerker's Guide to World Tour Domination

by Zakk Wylde, Eric Hendrikx

Overview

Bringing Metal to the Children is a handbook to all things Heavy Metal, brought to you by insane prankster and guitar god Zakk Wylde, of Ozzy Osbourne and Black Label Society fame.

This “Complete Berzerker's Guide to World Tour Domination” provides tips and tests for the True Rocker—as wild man Zakk Wylde invites all who dare onto the tour bus for brain-bursting tales of glory, debauchery, and general mayhem in the dangerous metal universe.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9780062002754
Publisher:	HarperCollins
Publication date:	04/09/2013
Pages:	290
Sales rank:	448,797
Product dimensions:	5.90(w) x 8.90(h) x 1.00(d)

About the Author

In the two decades since Ozzy Osbourne hired him away from his job at a New Jersey gas station to become his new guitarist, Zakk Wylde has established himself as a guitar icon known and revered the world over. Writing and recording with Osbourne led to multiplatinum success, inspiring him to create the now-legendary Black Label Society in 1998. Wylde has won nearly every guitar award imaginable, and is a major influence on a new battalion of rock guitarists.

Writer, photographer, and fellow Berzerker Eric Hendrikx is a notable contributor to more than a dozen books, including Forrest Griffin's New York Times bestsellers Got Fight? and Be Ready When the Sh*t Goes Down. A lifelong musician, Hendrikx playedguitar in the rock band Snake River Conspiracy. He currently lives in Southern California with his son, Stone.

In the two decades since Ozzy Osbourne hired him away from his job at a New Jersey gas station to become his new guitarist, Zakk Wylde has established himself as a guitar icon known and revered the world over. Writing and recording with Osbourne led to multiplatinum success, inspiring him to create the now-legendary Black Label Society in 1998. Wylde has won nearly every guitar award imaginable, and is a major influence on a new battalion of rock guitarists.

Writer, photographer, and fellow Berzerker Eric Hendrikx is a notable contributor to more than a dozen books, including Forrest Griffin's New York Times bestsellers Got Fight? and Be Ready When the Sh*t Goes Down. A lifelong musician, Hendrikx playedguitar in the rock band Snake River Conspiracy. He currently lives in Southern California with his son, Stone.

Table of Contents

General Black Label Society Warning ix

Foreword Chris Jericho xi

Author's Note xiv

Preface xvii

1 The Berzerkers of Asgard 1

2 The Black Vatican 65

3 GIFD 97

4 No Shitting on the Bus 151

5 Perils of Valhalla 199

6 Pssst! Don't Tell the Warden 233

Epilogue: One for the Road 259

Acknowledgments 264

Appendix: Bonus Material 269

From the Desk of John DeServio 285

What People are Saying About This

Eddie Van Halen

“Zakk Wylde. Great Player. Great Sound. Great friend.”

Rob Zombie

“If Zakk Wylde did not exisit, we would have to build him like Frankenstein’s monster. The hands of Randy Rhoads sewn onto the body of Conan the Barbarian implanted with the brain of Larry David.”

Kerry King

“When Zakk plays, it’s like Guitarmageddon!! An audio assault coming from his fret board, the ture meaning of a guitar hero.”

Slash

“Zakk Wylde is one of the true Heavy Metal guitar heroes of his generation. They don’t come much beter than Zakk!”

William Shatner

“In my opinion, Zakk Wylde is the f*cking best guitarist in the world. He curses like a f*cking marine and knows more about f*cking music than anybody I’ve ever f*cking met. I hope you can use this f*cking opinion.”

Editorial Reviews

Zakk Wylde. Great Player. Great Sound. Great friend.” — Eddie Van Halen

“Zakk Wylde is one of the true Heavy Metal guitar heroes of his generation. They don’t come much beter than Zakk!” — Slash

“If Zakk Wylde did not exisit, we would have to build him like Frankenstein’s monster. The hands of Randy Rhoads sewn onto the body of Conan the Barbarian implanted with the brain of Larry David.” — Rob Zombie

“When Zakk plays, it’s like Guitarmageddon!! An audio assault coming from his fret board, the ture meaning of a guitar hero.” — Kerry King, Slayer

“In my opinion, Zakk Wylde is the f*cking best guitarist in the world. He curses like a f*cking marine and knows more about f*cking music than anybody I’ve ever f*cking met. I hope you can use this f*cking opinion.” — William Shatner

From the Publisher

Zakk Wylde. Great Player. Great Sound. Great friend.

Eddie Van Halen

Zakk Wylde is one of the true Heavy Metal guitar heroes of his generation. They don’t come much beter than Zakk!

Slash

When Zakk plays, it’s like Guitarmageddon!! An audio assault coming from his fret board, the ture meaning of a guitar hero.

Kerry King

In my opinion, Zakk Wylde is the f*cking best guitarist in the world. He curses like a f*cking marine and knows more about f*cking music than anybody I’ve ever f*cking met. I hope you can use this f*cking opinion.

William Shatner

If Zakk Wylde did not exisit, we would have to build him like Frankenstein’s monster. The hands of Randy Rhoads sewn onto the body of Conan the Barbarian implanted with the brain of Larry David.

Rob Zombie

In 1987, Wylde roared into the world of heavy metal music at age 19 as Ozzy Osbourne’s new lead guitarist, and he hasn’t really stopped—still a partner with Ozzy, Wylde has spent the last decade on his own, selling millions of CDs to a huge fan base he calls “Berserkers,” after his beloved ancient Viking warriors who fought “like the Hulk on acid.” But that basically is the problem with this often funny inside look at Wylde’s heavy metal band, Black Label Society (“so secret we don’t even know who we are”)—it really won’t appeal to anyone outside of his fans. The bulk of the book consists of stories and lessons from various tours that are straight out of the film Spinal Tap (“Rule No. 5: Smell everything before you eat or drink it!”). Even his detailed look at how he records in his personal studio, the “Black Vatican,” which shows a clear-headed dedication to his craft, is mired in sentences like “Finding the right studio to record in is like finding the right hole to put your schlong into.” However, Wylde offers sincerely passionate words of encouragement to his teenage fans to find in themselves what “is truly yours, believe in it, and run with it.” (Oct.)

Publishers Weekly

Longtime guitarist for Ozzy Osbourne, founder and front man of Black Label Society, and self-proclaimed Viking, Wylde lays out his guidelines for success for the benefit of all would-be warriors of heavy metal. These are expanded upon by dozens of examples from the road and studio, all of which involve some combination of drunkenness, nudity, and property damage. Regardless of whether you find those topics funny, it's clear that Wylde does, and his enthusiasm and genuine happiness are undeniable. This is one rock star who's not ashamed to say that being a rock star is awesome. Guest columns from friends and colleagues including Dave "Snake" Sabo of Skid Row and wrestler Chris Jericho add to the fun. VERDICT This is not for the faint of heart or weak of stomach, but true berserkers will get their fill of profane good times and gross-out laughs. Recommended for metalheads and lovers of tales from life on tour.—Neil Derksen, Gwinnett Cty. P.L., Lawrenceville, GA

Library Journal