Buck Fever

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Overview

Blanco County, Texas: It's the week before deer hunting season, as close to a statewide holiday you get in Texas, and the locals are getting restless. Red O'Brien and Billy Don Craddock aren't the only good ol' boys out at night spotlighting deer from their pickups, trying to get a jump on the hundreds of hunters that will be out come Saturday. Game Warden John Marlin has his hands full with poaching complaints coming in faster than he can write out-of-season tickets. Then a call of a different sort comes in. A man dressed up in some sort of deer costume has been shot at the Circle S ranch, and witnesses are reporting a massive wild-eyed buck deer ...
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Overview

Blanco County, Texas: It's the week before deer hunting season, as close to a statewide holiday you get in Texas, and the locals are getting restless. Red O'Brien and Billy Don Craddock aren't the only good ol' boys out at night spotlighting deer from their pickups, trying to get a jump on the hundreds of hunters that will be out come Saturday. Game Warden John Marlin has his hands full with poaching complaints coming in faster than he can write out-of-season tickets. Then a call of a different sort comes in. A man dressed up in some sort of deer costume has been shot at the Circle S ranch, and witnesses are reporting a massive wild-eyed buck deer prancing about the pasture in a lovesick frenzy.

Marlin's seen a lot in his years, but this is wilder than he could have imagined: the man in the deer suit is a good friend, and the whacked-out whitetail isn't exactly a stranger either. It's the beginning of a mad, frantic weekend in Blanco County, one that will see a few more men shot, an invasion by Colombians with more than hunting on their minds, and damn near the end of Marlin's life. Newcomer Ben Rehder serves it all up with a huge helping of humor in this comic mystery that will firmly establish him as the funniest crime writer in Texas.

Editorial Reviews

Jamie Harrison
...funny, nightmarish tale from the Texas Hill Country, where being a game warden might be harder than being a cop.
Texas Monthly Online
...the summer's best find... Rehder comes out swinging...Buck Fever is too fun to be legal.
Tim Dorsey
This one slithers, shakes and strikes like a diamondback. Don't miss it.
Publishers Weekly
It's not easy to be consistently absurd for an entire book. This debut novel is a complete success, tearing out of Texas chock-full of characters so nutty and events so strange it seems as if they must be real. Game warden John Marlin has been best friends with Phil Colby since grade school. Marlin essentially grew up on the vast spread of the Colby ranch, and he was nearly as crushed as Colby when the ranch was lost. The new owner, Roy Swank, is as greedy and unscrupulous a man as Texas can produce-and everyone knows Texas does things in a big way. Swank can be petty, too: he insisted Colby leave his tame deer, aptly named Buck, pointing out that native whitetails belong to the state. Swank has set up a profitable deer farm, and hunting season is right around the corner. He's got a big opening day planned, complete with rich and famous guests. Marlin, meanwhile, comes across some white powder that spilled from a poached deer-one that belongs to Swank. There's also a wildlife biologist dressed up as a doe, a doe dressed in stiletto heels and a garter belt, as well as some frequently drunk good ol' boys named Red and Billy Don. Rehder gives Marlin a little time to talk about hunting, to explain that it doesn't have to be merely a killing spree. Although his observations seem somewhat forced, it's probably a worthwhile interjection. The writing here is confident and vigorous; the tone is quintessentially Texan and relentlessly wry. There's sure to be a long career for this happy, wacky series. (Sept. 16) Copyright 2002 Cahners Business Information.
Library Journal
County game warden John Marlin and Sheriff Herbert Mackey lock horns when two dumb-and-dumber poachers accidentally shoot another idiotic guy wearing a deer costume. The poachers also wound a particularly rambunctious big-antlered buck, which just happens to be Marlin's former pet. Elsewhere in the county, a body is discovered beneath a shoddily repaired bridge, and a slick, drug-dealing Colombian comes looking for a game, ranch-owning, crooked lobbyist. This is a wild and crazy first novel, crowded with weird people, unusual relationships (both animal and human), and frequent humor that will appeal to fans of Carl Hiaasen, Tim Dorsey, and other comic mystery writers. Strongly recommended for most collections. Copyright 2002 Cahners Business Information.
Denver Post
The past two decades it's been our pleasure to be among the first reviewers to take notice of several writers who eventually became best sellers, including Nevada Barr, Lee Child and Randy Wayne White. Ben Rehder has what it takes to join that group. Imagine Carl Hiaasen with a Texas accent, then throw in a touch of Pete Hautman and a dash of Kinky Friedman, and you've got Rehder. His first mystery, "Buck Fever," is a laugh-filled riot set in the Texas Hill Country where game warden John Marlin
Library Journal
County game warden John Marlin and Sheriff Herbert Mackey lock horns when two dumb-and-dumber poachers accidentally shoot another idiotic guy wearing a deer costume. The poachers also wound a particularly rambunctious big-antlered buck, which just happens to be Marlin's former pet. Elsewhere in the county, a body is discovered beneath a shoddily repaired bridge, and a slick, drug-dealing Colombian comes looking for a game, ranch-owning, crooked lobbyist. This is a wild and crazy first novel, cro
Publishers Weekly
It's not easy to be consistently absurd for an entire book. This debut novel is a complete success, tearing out of Texas chock-full of characters so nutty and events so strange it seems as if they must be real. Game warden John Marlin has been best friends with Phil Colby since grade school. Marlin essentially grew up on the vast spread of the Colby ranch, and he was nearly as crushed as Colby when the ranch was lost. The new owner, Roy Swank, is as greedy and unscrupulous a man as Texas can pro
Texas Monthly
Austinite Ben Rehder’s debut novel is the summer’s best find. With a nod and a wink to Carl Hiaasen, Rehder comes out swinging with a sardonic Tex-centric look at trophy deer hunters, beer-guzzling poachers, and Game Warden John Marlin—the man charged with keeping them all in line. Buck Fever is too fun to be legal.

Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9781466414549
  • Publisher: CreateSpace
  • Publication date: 10/13/2011
  • Pages: 234
  • Product dimensions: 6.00 (w) x 9.00 (h) x 0.49 (d)

Meet the Author

Ben Rehder is an avid hunter and outdoorsman who lives in Austin, Texas, with his wife Becky. Buck Fever is his first novel.

Read an Excerpt

BUCK FEVER

A BLANCO COUNTY TEXAS, NOVEL
By BEN REHDER

ST. MARTIN'S MINOTAUR

Copyright © 2002 Ben Rehder
All right reserved.

ISBN: 0312291140


Chapter One

BY THE TIME Red O'Brien finished his thirteenth beer, he could hardly see through his rifle scope. Worse yet, his partner, Billy Don Craddock, was doing a lousy job with the spotlight.

"Dammit, Billy Don, we ain't hunting raccoons," Red barked. "Get that light out of the trees and shine it out in the pastures where it will do me some good."

Billy Don mumbled something unintelligible, kicked some empty beer cans around on the floorboard of Red's old Ford truck, and then belched loudly from way down deep in his three-hundred-pound frame. That was his standard rebuttal anytime Red got a little short with him. The spotlight, meanwhile, continued to illuminate the canopy of a forty-foot Spanish oak.

Red cussed him again and pulled the rifle back in the window. Every time they went on one of these poaching excursions, Red had no idea how he managed to get a clean shot. After all, poaching white-tailed deer was serious business. It called for stealth and grace, wits and guile. It had been apparent to Red for years that Billy Don came up short in all of these departments.

"Turn that friggin' light off and hand me a beer," Red said.

"Don't know what we're doing out here on a night like this anyhow," Billy Don replied as he duginto the ice chest for two fresh Keystones. "Moon ain't up yet. All the big ones will be bedded down till it rises. Any moron knows that."

Red started to say that Billy Don was an excellent reference for gauging what a moron may or may not know. But he thought better of it, being that Billy Don weighed roughly twice what Red did. Not to mention that Billy Don had quite a quick temper after his first twelve-pack.

"Billy Don, let me ask you something. Someone walked into your bedroom shining a light as bright as the sun in your face, what's the first thing you'd do?"

"Guess I'd wag my pecker at 'em," Billy Don said, smiling. He considered himself quite glib.

"Okay," Red said patiently, "then what's the second thing you'd do?"

"I'd get up and see what the hell's going on."

"Damn right!" Red said triumphantly. "Don't matter if the bucks are bedded down or not. Just roust 'em with that light and we'll get a shot. But remember, we won't find any deer up in the treetops."

Billy Don gave a short snort in reply.

Red popped the top on his new beer, revved the Ford, and started on a slow crawl down the quiet county road. Billy Don grabbed the spotlight and leaned out the window, putting some serious strain on the buttons of his overalls, as he shined the light back over the hood of the Ford to Red's left. They had gone about half a mile when Billy Don stirred.

"Over there!"

Red stomped the brakes, causing his Keystone to spill and run down into his crotch. He didn't even notice. Billy Don was spotlighting an oat field a hundred yards away, where two dozen deer grazed. Among them, one of the largest white-tailed bucks either of them had ever seen. "Fuck me nekkid," Red whispered.

"Jesus, Red! Look at that monster."

Red clumsily stuck the .270 Winchester out the window, banging the door frame and the rearview mirror in the process. The deer didn't even look their way. Red raised the rifle and tried to sight in on the trophy buck, but the deer had other things in mind.

While all the other deer were grazing in place, the buck was loping around the oat field in fits and starts, running in circles. He bounced, he jumped, he spun. Red and Billy Don had never seen such peculiar behavior.

"Somethin's wrong with that deer," Billy Don said, using his keen knowledge of animal behavioral patterns.

"Bastard won't hold still! Keep the light on him!" Red said.

"I've got him. Just shoot. Shoot!"

Red was about to risk a wild shot when the buck finally seemed to calm down. Rather than skipping around, it was now walking fast, with its nose low to the ground. The buck approached a large doe partially obscured behind a small cedar tree and, with little ceremony, began to mount her.

Billy Don giggled, the kind of laugh you'd expect from a schoolgirl, not a flannel-clad six-foot-six cedar-chopper. "Why, I do believe it's true love."

Red sensed his chance, took a deep breath, and squeezed the trigger. The rifle bellowed as orange flame leapt out of the muzzle and licked the night, and then all was quiet.

The buck, and the doe of his affections, crumpled to the ground while the other deer scattered into the brush. Seconds passed. And then, to the chagrin of the drunken poachers, the huge buck climbed to his hooves, snorted twice, and took off. The doe remained on the ground.

"Dammit, Red! You missed."

"No way! It was a lung shot. I bet it went all the way through. Grab your wirecutters."

Knowing that a wounded deer can run several hundred yards or more, both men staggered out of the truck, cut their way through the eight-foot deerproof fence, and proceeded over to the oat field.

Each man had a flashlight and was looking feverishly for traces of blood, when they heard a noise.

"What the hell was that?" Billy Don asked.

"Shhh."

Then another sound. A moaning, from the wounded doe lying on the ground.

Billy Don was spooked. "That's weird, Red. Let's get outta here."

Red shined his light on the wounded animal twenty yards away. "Hold on a second. What the hell's wrong with its hide? It looks all loose and ..." He was about to approach the deer when they both heard something they'd never forget.

The doe clearly said, "Help me."

Without saying a word, both men scrambled back toward the fence. For the first time in his life, Billy Don Craddock actually outran somebody.

Seconds later, the man in the crudely tailored deer costume could hear the tires squealing as the truck sped away.

Just as Red and Billy Don were sprinting like boot-clad track stars, a powerful man was in the middle of a phone call. Unfortunately for the man, Roy Swank, it was hard to judge his importance by looking at him. In fact, he looked a lot like your average pond frog. Round, squat body. Large, glassy eyes. Bulbous lips in front of a thick tongue. And, of course, the neck-or rather, the lack of one. It was as if his head sat directly on his sloping shoulders. His voice was his best feature, deep and charismatic.

Roy Swank had relocated to a large ranch southwest of Johnson City, Texas, five years ago, after a successful (although intentionally anonymous) career lobbying legislators in Austin. The locals who knew or cared what a lobbyist was never really figured out what Swank lobbied for. Few people ever had, because Swank was the type of lobbyist who always conducted business in the shadows of a back room, rarely putting anything down on paper. But he and the entities he represented had the kind of resources and resourcefulness that could sway votes or help introduce new legislation. So when the rumors spread about Swank's retirement, the entire state political system took notice-although there were as many people relieved as disappointed.

After lengthy consideration (his past had to be weighed carefully-life in a county full of political enemies might be rather difficult), Swank purchased a ten-thousand-acre ranch one hour west of Austin. Swank was actually planning on semiretirement; the ranch was a successful cattle operation and he intended to maintain its sizable herd of Red Brangus. He had even kept the former owner on as foreman for a time.

But without the busy schedule of his previous career, Swank became restless. That is, until he rediscovered one of the great passions he enjoyed as a young adult: deer hunting. The hunting bug bit, and it bit hard. He spent the first summer on his new ranch building deer blinds, clearing brush in prime hunting areas, distributing automatic corn and protein feeders, and planting food plots such as oats and rye. It paid off the following season, as Swank harvested a beautiful twelve-point buck with a twenty-two-inch spread that tallied 133 Boone & Crockett points, the scoring standard for judging trophy bucks. Not nearly as large as the world-renowned bucks in South Texas, but a very respectable deer for the Hill Country. Several of his closest associates joined him on the ranch and had comparable success.

Swank, never one to do anything in moderation, decided that his ranch could become one of the most successful hunting operations in Texas. By importing some key breeding stock from South Texas and Mexico, and then following proper game-management techniques, Swank set out to develop a herd of whitetails as large and robust-and with the same jaw-dropping trophy antlers-as their southern brethren.

He had phenomenal success. After all, money was no object, and the laws and restrictions that regulated game importation and relocation melted away under Swank's political clout. After four seasons, not only was his ranch (the Circle S) known throughout the state for trophy deer, he had actually started a lucrative business exporting deer to other ranches around the nation.

Swank was tucked away obliviously in his four-thousand-square-foot ranch house, on the phone to one of his most valued customers, at the same moment Red O'Brien blasted unsuccessfully at a large buck in Swank's remote southern pasture.

"They went out on the trailer today," Swank said in his rich timbre. He was sitting at a large mahogany desk in an immense den. A fire burned in the huge limestone fireplace, despite the warm weather. He cradled the phone with his shoulder as he reached across the desk, grabbed a bottle of expensive scotch and poured himself another glass. "Four of them. But the one you'll be especially interested in is the ten-pointer," Swank said as he went on to describe the "magnificent beast."

Swank grunted a few times, nodding. "Good. Yes, good." Then he hung up. Swank had a habit of never saying good-bye.

By the time he finished his conversation, a man who sounded just like Red O'Brien had already made an anonymous call to 911.



Excerpted from BUCK FEVER by BEN REHDER Copyright © 2002 by Ben Rehder
Excerpted by permission. All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted January 29, 2007

    Easy Reading

    I have read the first two titles in the series. Well written, characters come to life. Plots well done and carefully thought out. This is funny light easy reading that keeps your attention and entertains well. Looking forward to next in the series.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted February 12, 2003

    Fast moving adventure story.

    The author brings the various elements of his story together with great skill. I couldn't put it down once started. Each sub-plot is carefully linked to the other and it all comes out with a great ending. Behind the story is a subtle dig at the game farms that are replacing traditional wild range deer hunting. A great story.

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  • Posted December 9, 2008

    more from this reviewer

    Enjoyable Game Warden police procedural

    Usually the opening week of dear hunting season in Blanco County, Texas is a bit wild but this year things get really crazy the week before the season opens. Red O¿Brien and Billy Don Craddock are poaching on the tail end of the Circle S Ranch when they spot some big dear. They shoot but one of the deer they are aiming at is a human in disguise and the other is jumping around like a kangaroo.

    Game Warden John Marlin is called onto the scene and recognizes the bouncing deer as Buck who his best friend Phil Colby raised as an infant. John gives Buck back to Phil even though the deer technically belongs to the owner of the Circle S, retired but still powerful lobbyist Roy Swank. For some reason, Swank wants the deer back and will go to any length to achieve that goal no matter who gets hurt in the process.

    This first installment in this new mystery series is both serious and funny, sometimes at the same time. The protagonist plays straight man to all the eccentric characters that make up the support cast, giving BUCK FEVER an almost slapstick feel at times. The story line is well developed with all the sub-plots tying seamlessly into the main tale. Ben Rehder has a distinctively refreshing and original voice, a bright new star in the mystery genre.

    Harriet Klausner

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  • Anonymous

    Posted August 8, 2011

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