Bully . . . described in the Concise English Dictionary: âa browbeating person, esp someone who is habitually cruel to other weaker people; âintimidate with persistently aggressive or violent behaviour, or by using threats of violence;â These two descriptions are certainly true, but to the victims who have so generously submitted their ...
Bully . . . described in the Concise English Dictionary:
âa browbeating person, esp someone who is habitually cruel to other weaker people;
âintimidate with persistently aggressive or violent behaviour, or by using threats of violence;â
These two descriptions are certainly true, but to the victims who have so generously submitted their stories for inclusion in this book . . .
they would barely be adequate. I have been one such victim. But my tale of woe is NOTHING compared with the humiliation, embarrassment,
degradation and so much more that many of the people featured in this book have suffered, many still suffering.
The suggestion of writing a book about bullying was put to me some years ago . . . I cannot actually recall who did suggest it, or when, but it certainly planted a seed in my mind. Research through those years has suggested that many have written books before me, but no-one seems to have actually devoted a book almost entirely to stories of victims . . . this was my goal. In communicating with these and other victims, both current and past, I found that they all appeared to have the same message . . . just how therapeutic it was to be able to . . . just talk about it . . . get it off their chests. Of course, there are always the exceptions. Sadly, one particular victim has been so badly scarred that he found it too difficult to write his experiences at all. And writing their stories will never change the fact that these people have been bullied. Many have had counselling, many have not . . . many are still undergoing this. Some cases are far more serious than others . . . some have undergone the court process . . . others are still going through this . . .
The stories within these pages vary hugely . . . from supposedly minor cases through to some which are far some serious. But irrespective of the severity of them, the effects on the victims have been horrendous. Many have made my blood boil.
Doing this has given me a very small idea of just how mammoth this problem is and that it is EVERYWHERE. No-one is immune, nor is any institution, any situation. It takes place at any age, any gender, any faith,
anywhere, any time.
Many of the victims were bullied in their teens and/or childhood,
and some of these people were raised in the years prior to bullying being recognized and/or acknowledged. For some victims it is past tense, for others a very current and continuing nightmare. Some stories have come from various work places. There are even a couple written by people who have been bullied and have been bullies themselves.
What has disturbed and infuriated me throughout (and believe me, I
would NOT have wanted to have my blood pressure nor stress levels taken while doing this), something that does appear to be a common thread,
particularly with the stories taken from schools . . . in seeking help, justice and compensation through the appropriate channels, the education and legal systems, in almost every case it appears that that the perpetrator/s is/
are the ones who have been supported . . . NOT the victims. Most if not all schools maintain that they have a âbullying policyâ in place . . . but given all that is covered in these stories, and some of the outcomes, I do have to question . . . just how effective are these policies and who are they aiming to help????
In one particular case, the victim lost her father, which was tragic enough in itself, but then . . . from what I can see, she was bullied . . . partly for this reason? Losing her father????? WHY? What is the MENTALITY
A few of these histories are quite long and, as previously mentioned,
some victims continue their fight for compensation and/or justice. I have and do feel so much for the parents, families of the victims and for the victims themselves. Overall from what I have learned, the attitudes of the schools leave me cold. I am not saying that this applies in all cases world wide . . . goodness knows, those in the following pages are only the smallest drop in the ocean compared with the amount of bullying that continues
24/7. But from what I have read through these and dozens of other cases as well . . . sadly that does appear to be true of many schools.
Please bear in mind as you read through that all these cases are direct quotes from victims or a loved one and all have been reproduced with the original spelling, grammar, punctuation etc in place. All case histories have been reproduced as closely as possible to the original texts written by the victims. However, all names of both humans and institutions, towns etc have been changed to protect the innocent.
I know bullying is a widespread and horrible problem and sadly, seems to be increasing and it is everywhere. When I first decided to write this book, I was mainly using it as a therapeutic tool for my own experiences.
But then, as mentioned, others heard about this and contacted me . . . and
I received a lot of response from some advertising I did . . . and thus my book was born.
I have no idea who will read this publication, and I will not say I hope you enjoy it . . . unlike most publications, that is not the purpose of this book. But I really hope that reading it does do some good, somewhere in this world we live in, to make life more bearable for the victims of bullying.