But I Didn't Mean That!: How to Avoid Misunderstandings and Hurt Feelings in Everyday Life

But I Didn't Mean That!: How to Avoid Misunderstandings and Hurt Feelings in Everyday Life

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by Richard Heyman, June Paris, Rachel Small
     
 

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If you don't do it yourself, you certainly know someone who is forever putting a foot into his or her mouth. This person has raised the tasteless, thoughtless, tactless, or otherwise terrifically awful remark into an art form. If there is a wrong place, a wrong time, or a wrong person to whom to say anything, they're on the spot and on the ready. And though we

Overview

If you don't do it yourself, you certainly know someone who is forever putting a foot into his or her mouth. This person has raised the tasteless, thoughtless, tactless, or otherwise terrifically awful remark into an art form. If there is a wrong place, a wrong time, or a wrong person to whom to say anything, they're on the spot and on the ready. And though we can joke about it (at the right time, of course), careless speech is no laughing matter. Words really can hurt-not only the person at whom they're aimed but the speaker, too, whose relationship, career, and social prospects can all suffer as a result of unmindful speech.

Fortunately, this book can help even the most scandalous mis-speaker. It outlines six simple questions, called Q-Points (Questions of Positive Thinking and Speaking) for readers to keep in mind before they speak. Who am I speaking to? What am I not seeing? Where will my words get me? How will the other person react to my words? When do I say it? And why must I say it at all? By coming up with an answer in the moment before speaking, anyone can start to avoid terrible slips in speaking judgment that can hurt themselves and others. But I Didn't Mean That! analyzes the most problematic speaking situations to show how the Q-points can be used to start conversing with empathy, confidence, and unimpeachable tact.

Product Details

ISBN-13:
9781608825349
Publisher:
New Harbinger Publications
Publication date:
05/01/2007
Sold by:
Barnes & Noble
Format:
NOOK Book
Pages:
168
File size:
382 KB

Meet the Author

Richard Heyman, Ed.D, is a specialist in the use of language in everyday life. He is professor of communication and education at the University of Calgary and president of Richard Heyman Associates, a business communications consulting company. He was the founder and director (until 1988) of the Discourse Analysis Research Group, a think tank devoted to researching language and communication, and he has published more than thirty book chapters and articles on his research. He has more than thirty-five years of experience in communications consulting and has presented his work to professionals, academics, and laypeople.
A freelance writer and writing teacher, June Paris has devoted years of study and training of ethical speech and positive communication.
Rachel Small is a former special education teacher. She is currently the vice president of a flourishing family business.

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5 out of 5 based on 0 ratings. 3 reviews.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
SparkPaw lay in her nest, watching the other apprentices. SlickPaw and PinePaw were sound asleep. So was little GrassPaw. He was older than SparkPaw, but much smaller. He was nice. PinePaw- not nice at all. SlickPaw turned out to be grumpy, unfriendly, and big. He was the oldest apprentice and was going to become a warrior soon. But there was somebody missing.... SparkPaw could tell. Suddenly, the ferns rustled. A cat was coming. Then LeafPaw stepped through. That was the other apprentice! LeafPaw seemed nice, and she was probably going to be her company in the crowded den. "Hi," LeafPaw whispered. "Hi," SparkPaw whispered back. Then LeafPaw motioned for SparkPaw to follow her. "Our mentors are ready, and the other apprentice's mentors are waiting. Let's let SlickPaw, PinePaw and GrassPaw sleep in! It's payback." LeafPaw exclaimed quietly. SkyPrism and LeapFall were waiting, just like LeafPaw said. SparkPaw gave LeafPaw a small wink. She then bounded to SkyPrism. "Can we start training today? I wanna hunt. I bet I can catch a big juicy salmon!" SkyPrism laughed. "Okay, okay. Let's start over by the river." SparkPaw padded with her, looking back at LeafPaw. "Hey, SkyPrism, LeafPaw wants to hunt too, so maybe we could take these excited apprentices to the lake together?" LeapFall asked. SkyPrism nodded. "That's a good idea." The four she cats padded alongside. When they got to the lake- or what used to be a lake- was covered in Twolegs!
Guest More than 1 year ago
Very entertaining for a self-help book. The stories really bring the points across. I hope to try the program. I really think it could work.
Guest More than 1 year ago
thank you to the authors of this book i really believe it will help me alot in dealing with people i already see how much more i think subconciously before i speak dena gold