Cats with Thumbs: a Beach Slapped Humor Collection (2010)

( 2 )

Overview

"If cats had opposable thumbs, they would try to kill us all in our sleep with tiny pistols. They are evil little animals." And so begins another year of observations from Amazon.com best-seller Barton Grover Howe. With more reflections on life from his "Beach Slapped" newspaper column, he's at it again: The discussions between his pregnant wife and allegedly-sympathetic women ("What else explains the endless discussion about what's about to emerge from her: Watermelons, bowling balls, Black & Decker tool sets, you name it. And as long as the ...
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Cats with Thumbs: A Beach Slapped Humor Collection (2010)

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Overview

"If cats had opposable thumbs, they would try to kill us all in our sleep with tiny pistols. They are evil little animals." And so begins another year of observations from Amazon.com best-seller Barton Grover Howe. With more reflections on life from his "Beach Slapped" newspaper column, he's at it again: The discussions between his pregnant wife and allegedly-sympathetic women ("What else explains the endless discussion about what's about to emerge from her: Watermelons, bowling balls, Black & Decker tool sets, you name it. And as long as the sentence ends with '... it's like that scene in "Alien,''' they seem pleased that they could share this amusing little anecdote."); his daughter's arrival into the rainy world of the Oregon coast ("It's a moist, dark and quiet kind of place; pretty much a womb with a view."); and other people's ongoing need to make him a better person ("This is national 'Turn Off Your TV Week,' something I first heard about on TV, thus highlighting why this is the dumbest thing on Earth.")

It's another year of impending fatherhood, babies flooding into the world - literally - and all the other things that will leave readers "Beach Slapped" as Barton once again gives readers 52 reasons to laugh out loud.

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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9781478337232
  • Publisher: CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform
  • Publication date: 8/4/2012
  • Pages: 138
  • Product dimensions: 5.50 (w) x 8.50 (h) x 0.32 (d)

Meet the Author

Barton Grover Howe resides in the only small town on the Oregon coast that has seven miles of coastline and not one boat dock. A high school teacher, his students don't find him near as funny as he thinks they should - much like their parents, who use teacher conferences to tell him they have no idea what he's talking about half the time in his weekly humor column. On the plus side, he is married to the most patient woman on Earth and is father to the cutest daughter in the universe, who got all of her looks from her mother.
In addition to writing a weekly humor column, Barton is also an Amazon Top 10 best-selling novelist, bringing his weird sense of humor to tell the stories of Surfland, Oregon. The fictional home for the wet and weird, his first novel, "Beach Slapped" takes readers on an adventure that's been called by reviewers a "well written, tightly plotted romp."
"Move over Carl Hiaasen, Tim Dorsey, Dave Barry and all the other Florida humor satire writers. There's a new voice and a very accomplished one... Howe does for the Oregon Coast what Hiaasen and the others have done for Florida."
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Customer Reviews

Average Rating 4.5
( 2 )
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Sort by: Showing all of 2 Customer Reviews
  • Anonymous

    Posted December 12, 2013

    Angela

    Awww :(

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted December 12, 2013

    George

    Go to luxury res 1 to post biok

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