Confessions of a D-List Supervillain

Confessions of a D-List Supervillain

4.6 31
by Jim Bernheimer, Fiona Hsieh
     
 

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“Being a supervillain means never having to say you’re sorry … Unless it’s to the judge or the parole board. Even then, you don’t really have to. It’s not like it’s going to change the outcome or anything.”

Those are the words of Calvin Matthew Stringel, better known as Mechani-Cal. He’s a…  See more details below

Overview

“Being a supervillain means never having to say you’re sorry … Unless it’s to the judge or the parole board. Even then, you don’t really have to. It’s not like it’s going to change the outcome or anything.”

Those are the words of Calvin Matthew Stringel, better known as Mechani-Cal. He’s a sarcastic, down on his luck armored villain. Follow his exploits as he gets swept up in a world domination scheme gone wrong and ends up working for this weak willed, mercy loving heroes. Immerse yourself in his epic battles and see what it’s like to be an outsider looking in at a world that few have ever experienced.

Climb into Cal’s battlesuit and join him on his journey. Will he avoid selling out his principles for a paycheck and a pardon? Can he resist the camaraderie of being on a super team? Does he fall prey to the ample charms of the beautiful Olympian Aphrodite? How will he survive the jealous schemes of Ultraweapon, who wears armor so powerful it makes Cal’s look like a museum piece?

See the world of “righteous do-gooders through the eyes of someone who doesn’t particularly care for them.

And remember - Losing an argument with a group of rioters isn’t a good excuse to start lobbing tear gas indiscriminately at them. You’ve only got so many rounds and it’s going to be a long day, so make sure you get as many as possible with each one.

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Product Details

ISBN-13:
2940012483072
Publisher:
EJB Networking
Publication date:
04/24/2011
Series:
Confessions of a D-List Supervillain , #1
Sold by:
Barnes & Noble
Format:
NOOK Book
Sales rank:
149,430
File size:
655 KB

Meet the Author

Jim Bernheimer lives in Chesapeake, Virginia with his wife and two daughters. In addition to this novel, he is the author of the Dead Eye series and the Spirals of Destiny series from Gryphonwood Press. He is the author and publisher of Horror, Humor, and Heroes Volume One and the editor and publisher of Horror, Humor, and Heroes Volume Two.

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Confessions of a D-List Supervillain 4.6 out of 5 based on 0 ratings. 31 reviews.
BWFoster78 More than 1 year ago
In Confessions of a D-List Supervillain, Mr. Bernheimer tells the story of Calvin Stringel, an electrical engineer who makes bad choices. After a employment dispute with one of the heavyweight superheroes, he decides to turn to crime, but he’s not very good at it. The world, as it’s wont to do, becomes endangered, and all the do-gooders have been converted to the dark side. It’s up to Mechani-Cal to save the day. Why to buy this book: This novel is entertaining from start to finish, a true joy to read and hard to put down. The author makes fantastic plot choices. He could have focused on a plot-driven story about saving the world. Instead, it’s character driven, and the characters, even the minor ones, are fantastic. Why not to buy the book: It’s written in present tense. Normally, I hate present tense with a passion. I’ve literally put down otherwise promising books because of it. This one drew me in so quickly that I didn’t mind it. Other than that, I only had minor quibbles such as the use of subjunctive mood. The protagonist is portrayed as smart and educated; you’d think he’d know to say “if I were” instead of “if I was.” Bottom Line: I finished Confessions on New Year’s Day, and, already, I feel that it will be a strong contender for my favorite book of the year even considering that A Memory of Light is coming out soon. I don’t gush about books often, but it’s not often that I read a book I enjoyed this much. I paid the author the highest possible compliment — the day after finishing this book, I bought another of his novels, and this despite the fact that the new one features unicorns. There’s no question but that I give this book 5 stars.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Love seeing thing on the other side
ScatterPrime More than 1 year ago
A great read, wonderful characterization and a plot that keeps your attention. I would highly recommend this book to anyone.
AudiobookReviewer More than 1 year ago
The story begins in the middle of an all-out war with a swarm of insect-like creatures controlling the minds of everyone on earth. Calvin, AKA, Mechani-Cal was not infected because he is protected by his armor, which he lives in; he also lets us know how bad it smells in there. He manages to save Aphrodite, a stunningly beautiful superhero, who is being mind-controlled by the insect hoard. Of course, when she is rescued, she needs a shower, and of course Cal turns on the hidden camera. Cal is a villain, making his living off of crime and selling super armor to other villains. Sarcastic, despicable, of questionable morals, a slob, brilliant, and very funny; he finds himself alone in a battle to save the entire world, which also means saving the very superheroes who have made his life so difficult in the first place. This is a comic book story written from Cal’s perspective, with a self-deprecating honesty and humor that can’t help but make the listener laugh. The super-heroes are far more powerful, beautiful and so annoyingly good, we have to root for Cal. He’s us, flawed, jealous, mistreated and misjudged. Confessions feels like a comic book, but with a far greater depth of emotion and humor. The heroes, like their ancient mythological counterparts are jealous gods, fighting with each other as often as they are helping humanity. Calvin, all human, is full of flaws, without any superpowers beyond his own humanity and intelligence; and of course it is him, not the gods who must save the day. Satire, superheroes, super-villains, unlikely romance, and an unstoppable foe make this a hugely entertaining listen. It’s just fun. Jeffrey Kafer narrates the story, bringing it to life with his excellent performance. Talmadge Ragan reads the epilogue. Though her performance does not shine like Kafer’s, it is proficient, and perhaps a good choice as the story has changed so much when she comes in. For those looking for a fun, satirical comic book ride, Confessions of D-list Super-villain is a great choice and you won’t be disappointed. Audiobook provided for review by the author. Please find this complete review and many others at audiobookreviewer dot com [If this review helped, please press YES. Thanks!]
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
It is a quick, easy read. But man I enjoyed every second of it! Action-packed and fun. I highly recommend.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Read it
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
A fresh look on superheros that shows being called a hero or villain doesnt always define you. This book is one of my favorites and such a great read that i could easily read it multiple times right after another.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
This book was great. It really is the best book I've read in awhile. Gets the highest recommendation I can think of and that is a must buy.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
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Anonymous More than 1 year ago
This was a superb book, I only wish it was one a series so I could read the rest.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
I really enjoyed this book. I ran into the main character in an earlier set of short stories and wished at the time that Jim would write more about him. A villain who ends up having to save the world (as well as his former foes) is real entertainment.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Picked this up on a whim. Knew of Jim's previous work and was unaware of this book's existence until now :( Fast little romp that I couldn't put the down until I finished it. Great way to spend a couple of hours. I echo Clell65619 review down below.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
This book was something my friend let me and once i started i couldnt stop!
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
jathar More than 1 year ago
I thought the book was well written and an interesting read
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
I really enjoyed this a lot more than I was expecting to going in. It is witty and different and very well written
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
MGHarmon More than 1 year ago
COADLS skirts dangerously close to the Beware the Supermen trope. Unlike Alan Moore’s Watchmen, it doesn’t completely deconstruct the superhero, but it does gleefully dance around on top of the slippery slope of corrupting power, and is shot through with a kind of film noir sensibility–the kind of movie where the costumes don’t tell you who the good guys are. It’s hard to review a book like this without giving important twists away, so I won’t discuss plot here. It’s a fun story, well-told, and about the only criticism I have is that the story structure means that, in Lord of The Rings terms, Cal throws the Ring of Power into Mount Doom halfway through the book. Sure, everything after that is important, but not Save The World important; in my opinion, Mr. Bernheimer should have divided it into two shorter novels (novellas?). I’d have paid to read them both.