Crucial Accountability: Tools for Resolving Violated Expectations, Broken Commitments, and Bad Behavior

by David Maxfield, Kerry Patterson, Al Switzler, Ron McMillan, Joseph Grenny

Overview

Behind the problems that routinely plague our organizations and families, you'll find individuals who are either unwilling or unable to deal with broken promises. Colleagues break a rule, coworkers miss a deadline, friends fail to live up to commitments (or just plain behave badly), and nobody says a word. Nobody holds anyone accountable. With repeated infractions, individuals become increasingly upset until they finally do speak their minds, but they do so poorly—often creating whole new sets of problems.

Research proves that mishandled disappointments aren't just morale killers, they're institution killers—diminishing organizational performance by 20 to 50 percent and accounting for up to 90 percent of all divorces.

Drawing from 10,000 hours of observations, Crucial Accountability teaches you how to deal with common infractions such as:

An employee speaks to you in an insulting tone that crosses the line between sarcasm and insubordination. Now what?

Your boss just demanded that you meet a deadline you know you can't meet—and he clearly doesn't want to hear complaints about it.

Your son walks through the door sporting colorful new body art that raises your blood pressure by 40 points. Speak now or pay later.

Family members fret over how to tell Granddad that he should no longer drive his car. This is going to get ugly.

A nurse worries about what to say to an abusive physician. She quickly remembers "how things work around here" and decides not to say anything.

Everyone knows how to run for cover, or, if sufficiently provoked, step up to problems in a way that causes a real ruckus. Crucial Accountability teaches you how to deal with violated expectations in a way that solves the problem at hand without harming the relationship—and, in fact, even strengthens it.

Broken promises, missed deadlines, poor behavior—they don't just make others’ lives miserable; they can sap up to 50 percent of organizational performance and account for the vast majority of divorces. Crucial Accountability offers the tools for improving relationships in the workplace and in life and for resolving all these problems—permanently.

PRAISE FOR CRUCIAL ACCOUNTABILITY:

"Revolutionary ideas ... opportunities for breakthrough ..." — Stephen R. Covey, author of The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People

"Unleash the true potential of a relationship or organization and move it to the next level." — Ken Blanchard, coauthor of The One Minute Manager

"The most recommended and most effective resource in my library." — Stacey Allerton Firth, Vice President, Human Resources, Ford of Canada

"Brilliant strategies for those difficult discussions at home and in the workplace." — Soledad O'Brien, CNN news anchor and producer

"This book is the real deal.... Read it, underline it, learn from it. It's a gem." — Mike Murray, VP Human Resources and Administration (retired), Microsoft

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9780071830607
Publisher:	McGraw Hill LLC
Publication date:	06/21/2013
Edition description:	Net
Pages:	304
Sales rank:	1,103,574
Product dimensions:	6.30(w) x 9.10(h) x 1.10(d)

About the Author

Kerry Patterson, Joseph Grenny, David Maxfield, Ron McMillan, and Al Switzler are the leaders of VitalSmarts, an innovator in best-practices training products and services. The authors have taught millions of people worldwide and have worked with more than 300 of the Fortune 500 companies.

For more information, visit www.vitalsmarts.com.

McGraw-Hill authors represent the leading experts in their fields and are dedicated to improving the lives, careers, and interests of readers worldwide

McGraw-Hill authors represent the leading experts in their fields and are dedicated to improving the lives, careers, and interests of readers worldwide

McGraw-Hill authors represent the leading experts in their fields and are dedicated to improving the lives, careers, and interests of readers worldwide

Table of Contents

Foreword xiii

Preface xvii

Acknowledgments xviii

Introduction: What Is Crucial Accountability? And Who Cares? 1

Part 1 Work on Me First What to Do Before an Accountability Conversation 15

Chapter 1 Choose What and If How to Know What Conversation to Hold and If You Should Hold It 17

Chapter 2 Master My Stories How to Get Your Head Right Before Opening Your Mouth 47

Part 2 Create Safety What to Do During an Accountability Conversation 73

Chapter 3 Describe the Gap How to Start an Accountability Conversation 75

Chapter 4 Make It Motivating How to Help Others Want to Take Action 105

Chapter 5 Make It Easy How to Make Keeping Commitments (Almost) Painless 137

Chapter 6 Stay Focused and Flexible What to Do When Others Get Sidetracked, Scream, or Sulk 165

Part 3 Move to Action What to Do After an Accountability Conversation 193

Chapter 7 Agree on a Plan and Follow Up How to Gain Commitment and Move to Action 195

Chapter 8 Put It All Together How to Solve Big, Sticky, Complicated Problems 211

Chapter 9 The 12 "Yeah-Buts" How to Deal with the Truly Tough 225

Appendix A Where Do You Stand? A Self-Assessment for Measuring Your Accountability Conversation Skills 247

Appendix B Six-Source Diagnostic Questions The Six-Source Model 252

Appendix C When Things Go Right 256

Appendix D Discussion Questions for Reading Groups 263

Notes 265

Index 267