Read this review!! It's long but if you agree, it'll put a smirk on your face =]
I'm a little confused as to why so many people thought this was a good movie. In my opinion the books were great (the latter books more so than Twilight I must say), and while I'm not optimistic enough about movie adaptations to actually expect them to approach the depth of the storyline that a book can hold, I was hoping it wouldn't be TOO bad. But, come on, let's be honest, you know the movie was an epic train wreck.
Everyone's bashing Kristen Stewart so I'm gonna do her a favor and give her a break. I will say one thing though. I was hoping she would do a better job at trying awkwardly to be alluring to Jacob when they walked on the beach, but again, I suppose I shouldn't hope. Anyway, how about we get on to Rob Pattinson? The guy was horrible for the role. He was creepy and awkward and had a slight lisp. And was he even trying to achieve somewhat of a velvety voice, or did he realize that it was a lost cause and just decide to cut his losses? (Velvet does not equal raspy.) There was nothing graceful or perfect about him, his features, or the way he carried himself. I'll give him one thing though, it's difficult to tear your eyes from his face, but on the downside I think that's only because there's something awkward about it that you can't quite put your finger on. And there's nothing to be said about the perfect body he was supposed to have. Not exactly an Adonis. Personally, I think they chose him for the role because he's British and Americans tend to love the Brits. But guess what? Edward was born in Chicago. And Chicago is in AMERICA. But I digress.
Another thing that got under my skin about this movie was the plot, of which there was none. To say that they didn't stick to the book is a ridiculous understatement. I wonder how anyone who hadn't read the book first wasn't sitting there completely confused. It was more like a scrapbook than a movie. They threw in some direct quotes from the book, patted themselves on the back, then continued to butcher the story. It was like looking at a science project that was hastily put together the night before it was due. Train wreck. But hey, at least they didn't use the word "incredulously." Not once.
Why is Bella "unconditionally and irrevocably" in love with Edward? Who knows? But Meyer didn't really say why in the book either, so I guess I can't bash the movie for the one thing it remained consistent on.
The vamp makeup was pretty bad too. They looked more like paste than marble.
Edward's glitter-covered skin kind of annoyed me. I thought they might do a better job than that.
I realize I'm ranting now, but I don't really care.
I wish Alice had more of a role in the film, she's the one person who actually convinced me that they read the book.
James was better looking than Edward. Fail.
The baseball scene was pretty good, so kudos there. Emmett was pretty funny, so kudos there. Jasper was pretty funny too, but not in a way that he intended to be. (He looked cramped the whole time.) Rosalie successfully got on my nerves, so kudos to her too. Carlisle and Esme were not very memorable.
It's really not even fair to blame the failure of this movie on a tight budget. I have two words: THE MATRIX.
In closing, I'm looking forward to a parody of the film. It's practically BEGGING for Tina Fey's magical touch.
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Overview
When Bella Swan Kristen Stewart reluctantly moved to the perpetually overcast town of Forks, WA, and set out to carve a niche for herself, she assumed it would be one similar to the low-profile social position she held back in Phoenix. First on the list of surprises was the unfamiliar attention from the male population of her new high school; second, the attention from one male in particular: Edward Cullen, Vampire Robert Pattinson. Before long, the unlikely soul mates find themselves in a passionate relationship with a variety of significant setbacks, including Edward's special-needs diet he doesn't eat humans, but Bella's scent inspires a nearly impossible to harness bloodlust and the human girl's mortality. Though