Emma and the Vampires

( 10 )

Overview

What better place than pale England to hide a secret society of gentlemen vampires?

In this hilarious retelling of Jane Austen's Emma, screenwriter Wayne Josephson casts Mr. Knightley as one of the most handsome and noble of the gentlemen village vampires. Blithely unaware of their presence, Emma, who imagines she has a special gift for matchmaking, attempts to arrange the affairs of her social circle with delightfully disastrous results. But when her dear friend Harriet Smith ...

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Emma and the Vampires

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Overview

What better place than pale England to hide a secret society of gentlemen vampires?

In this hilarious retelling of Jane Austen's Emma, screenwriter Wayne Josephson casts Mr. Knightley as one of the most handsome and noble of the gentlemen village vampires. Blithely unaware of their presence, Emma, who imagines she has a special gift for matchmaking, attempts to arrange the affairs of her social circle with delightfully disastrous results. But when her dear friend Harriet Smith declares her love for Mr. Knightley, Emma realizes she's the one who wants to stay up all night with him. Fortunately, Mr. Knightley has been hiding a secret deep within his unbeating heart-his (literal) undying love for her... A brilliant mash-up of Jane Austen and the undead.

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Editorial Reviews

Publishers Weekly
Two conflicting concepts and a poor sense of period manners and terminology prevent the latest Jane Austen mash-up from fulfilling its comedic potential. Dangerous bands of vagrant vampires prove a constant threat to the stake-wielding young ladies of Highbury, so it is less than credible that the clever but occasionally oblivious Miss Emma Woodhouse and her friends would still be unable to recognize that local gentlemen possessed of pale skin, a fear of sunlight, and drooling fangs are, in fact, blood-drinkers. The joke of romantic lead Mr. Knightley and his fellows as ravenous but proper gentlemen vampires is well-conceived and occasionally combined very cleverly with Austen's original prose and characters, such as Emma's father's dislike of eating. However, calling the wild vampires vulgar is an unconvincing distinction when the supposed gentlemen scream and bellow, the respectable Emma discusses lust, and a matronly schoolteacher shouts, "Kill the bastards!" While Austen's tale has been effectively trimmed, the added passages are often poorly integrated, and the tonal shifts from the vampires-in-the-gentry sections to the gentry-as-vampire-slayers moments are disconcerting. The latter seem to belong to a different mash-up altogether, and in pursuing both jokes at once, the tale succeeds at neither.
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.
Examiner.com
Emma and the Vampires is full of wonderful little witty remarks that have you chuckling to yourself if not outright laughing out loud at Emma's 'cluelessness', Harriet's sweet trusting nature and the ridiculousness of fighting off hoards of vampires that seem to follow the upper set around town on their outings.

Emma's best and most heart fluttering scenes are still intact if not slightly blood enhanced for the horror thirsty. I would recommend giving this to your teen as an introduction to Austen if she wouldn't give her the time of day otherwise.

Mrs. Yingling Read
The language, settings, and plot of the original Emma are all preserved well, although the language is made much easier to read by Mr. Josephson, who originally rewrote this title for his daughter, who suggested that he add the vampires.
Reading with Tequila
By reading this book, people may be more willing to give the original version of Emma a try and and anything that gets readers excited about the classics is definitely worthwhile.
Literary Litter
Over all, this book was an excellent read. It pulls you in from the beginning and holds you tightly in it's grip. Characters are alive and wrought with scandal. It's difficult to put down and easy to pick back up. The lightheartedness with which it's written allows the reader to hold fast to the original feel of Jane's writing, while keeping it upbeat for today's reader.
Merry Genre Go Round Reviews
With a nod to Steve Hockensmith's Pride and Prejudice and Zombies and a wink at Jane Austen, Wayne Josephson converts Emma into a vampire thriller with stakes and tea. Although everyone knows vampires exist, Emma is terrific as she goes from totally clueless to Regency Buffy like slayer.
Austen Prose
More vampires in our Austen coming our way. This time, its Austen's handsome, clever, and rich Emma Woodhouse, with a comfortable home and happy disposition with very little to distress or vex her except her vampire neighbors.
Michelle's Book Blog
Throwing vampires into the life of no-it-all Emma makes for a fun read.
A Buckeye Girl Reads
I think that fans of the Jane Austen Mash Ups will love this book, and I love that there is still so much interest in Jane Austens books.
Pencil-Pusher and Ink-Splotches
I did like the new depth it gave Mr. Knightley, making him a vampire. It added a layer of understanding that you always felt was missing in the original character. As well, with Mr. Elton and Mrs. Elton being of the undead variety, their natural rudeness came across more appealing then ever their original characters did.
Suite101.com
Emma and the Vampires adds some knew witty dialogue to the original Emma that will keep readers smiling and entertained. Well worth the read, Emma and the Vampires is sure to be well liked by young adults.
Palmer's Picks for Reading
A great read and I loved the author's note about how he wanted young adult readers to like this book--as a teacher, I think this is a great way to get students to read some of the classics that they otherwise might be hesitant to read. I enjoyed this book greatly.
Books Like Breathing
Mindbogglingly awesome...Overall, this book surprised me on a level that I was not expecting. I was giggling throughout and found myself really engrossed.
Seriously Reviewed
Mr Josephson put a definite spin and freshness to an old story and made it really pop for me.
Book Girl of Mur-y-Castell
Vampires works so well here because he keeps it witty and a comedy of manners. The book is hilarious...For readers who love mash-ups, don't forget this one, and for those that haven't try one, just plunge in, and don't be horrified that Austen's works are being turned into something else. I am pretty sure she would have gotten a few laughs from it too.
In The Hammock
Since the original is much unchanged here, maybe new readers unwilling to try the Austen classic would get a chance to read the story here.
IndiePride
It had me laughing at a lot of sections where Emma says and does the oddest things. She has this unique ability to stay completely clueless yet manages to get things done.
Bookfoolery and Babble
I loved reading Emma and the Vampires because Mr. Josephson used the paranormal twist in a humorous way. A fun read and a great excuse to revisit Emma, my new favorite Austen character.
Connect With Your Teens
Emma and the Vampires might be the perfect book to use to introduce your teenage daughters to Jane Austen...a great book for mothers and daughters to share and connect over.
Debbie's Book Bag
If you put it up next to Jane Austen's work, you can easily see the parallels and Emma still has her most memorable moments in Josephson's adaptation. I was happy to see that the spirit of the novel is intact, however changed
Fresh Fiction
EMMA AND THE VAMPIRES is Wayne Josephson's first novel and an engaging froth of a read. It never takes itself too seriously and is entertaining in the same way as a good long gossip with a clever and cutting maiden aunt. It's the perfect book to pair with hot tea and biscuits on a rainy afternoon. I hope there are plenty more of Josephson's books to come!
Austenprose
More vampires in our Austen coming our way. This time, its Austen's handsome, clever, and rich Emma Woodhouse, with a comfortable home and happy disposition with very little to distress or vex her except her vampire neighbors.
BookLoons
A highly enjoyable romp
Long and Short Reviews
I was smitten with Emma and the Vampires. Mr. Knightley as a vampire is most swoon-worthy and the heart of the story remains intact. The writing is also quite good, and stays true to form of the work.
Books and Quilts
I remember loving the original and I equally loved this version. There were a number of times I roared with laughter at the turn of events...I absolutely loved this book.
First For Women
Just a few pages in, I was giggling like crazy. By the time I put the book down to go to bed, I had forgotten the stress of the day. I'm a fan of the recent trend of paranormal and classic mashups. And Emma transfers perfectly into this version.
Jane Austen's World
I enjoyed this novel for what it was. This book certainly has a different take on vampires. If it is true that it is geared toward a younger audience, then it has found its niche. While it would not appeal to die-hard fans of True Blood and Ann Rice novels, it does have a charm of its own.
Writers' Ally
I would recommend giving this book to your teen as an introduction to Jane Austen. It has the paranormal flare of today's literature, while keeping in tact the beauty and poise of yesterday's storytelling.
My Overstuffed Bookshelf
If you are a fan of fun loving romance with a paranormal twist, sink your teeth in Emma's funny, yet sometimes disastrous matchmaking skills! You won't be disappointed
Muse in the Fog
Her [Emma] delightful and witty personality was a perfect match for the vampire situation. Her easy dismissal of dire circumstances was quite amusing and I found myself laughing often at her random remarks on the situation. Overall it was an easy and comical read.
Sacramento Book Review
This book is a great read for any Austen fan, as well as anyone looking for a humorous love story with a copius dose of vampire gore.
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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9781402241345
  • Publisher: Sourcebooks, Incorporated
  • Publication date: 8/1/2010
  • Pages: 304
  • Sales rank: 1,445,156
  • Product dimensions: 8.08 (w) x 5.42 (h) x 0.91 (d)

Meet the Author

Wayne Josephson received his BA from Emory University and his MBA from Wharton. After twenty years on Wall Street, he decided to pursue his long-delayed desire to write, becoming a successful screenwriter. Emma and the Vampires is his first novel. He resides with his wife and three children in Charlottesville, Virginia.

Biography

In 1801, George Austen retired from the clergy, and Jane, Cassandra, and their parents took up residence in Bath, a fashionable town Jane liked far less than her native village. Jane seems to have written little during this period. When Mr. Austen died in 1805, the three women, Mrs. Austen and her daughters, moved first to Southampton and then, partly subsidized by Jane's brothers, occupied a house in Chawton, a village not unlike Jane's first home. There she began to work on writing and pursued publishing once more, leading to the anonymous publication of Sense and Sensibility in 1811 and Pride and Prejudice in 1813, to modestly good reviews.

Known for her cheerful, modest, and witty character, Jane Austen had a busy family and social life, but as far as we know very little direct romantic experience. There were early flirtations, a quickly retracted agreement to marry the wealthy brother of a friend, and a rumored short-lived attachment -- while she was traveling -- that has not been verified. Her last years were quiet and devoted to family, friends, and writing her final novels. In 1817 she had to interrupt work on her last and unfinished novel, Sanditon, because she fell ill. She died on July 18, 1817, in Winchester, where she had been taken for medical treatment. After her death, her novels Northanger Abbey and Persuasion were published, together with a biographical notice, due to the efforts of her brother Henry. Austen is buried in Winchester Cathedral.

Author biography courtesy of Barnes & Noble Books.

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    1. Date of Birth:
      December 16, 1775
    2. Place of Birth:
      Village of Steventon in Hampshire, England
    1. Date of Death:
      July 18, 1817
    2. Place of Death:
      Winchester, Hampshire, England
    1. Education:
      Taught at home by her father

Read an Excerpt

Emma Woodhouse - handsome, clever, and rich, with a comfortable home and happy disposition - had lived nearly twenty-one years in the world with very little to distress her. Until the vampire attacks began.

Emma resided with her affectionate, indulgent father at their estate, Hartfield, in the village of Highbury. She had been the mistress of the house ever since her sister Isabella's marriage seven years past. Her mother had died too long ago for Emma to have had more than a vague remembrance of her caresses. In her mother's place, an excellent woman named Miss Taylor had served as governess.

Miss Taylor was less a governess than a friend - their relationship had more the intimacy of sisters. Miss Taylor imposed hardly any restraints on Emma, living together as mutual friends, and Emma doing just what she liked. The real evils, indeed, of Emma's situation were the power of getting too much her own way and a disposition to think a bit too well of herself.

These were disadvantages that would lead to dangers which were presently unperceived - everyone in Emma's village was pale, this being England, so the vampire gentlemen of Highbury blended in quite nicely. Emma was blithely unaware when she found herself in their presence. And especially when she found herself attracted to them.

A gentle sorrow came when Miss Taylor married. The wedding had every promise of happiness for Emma's former governess. Her new husband, Mr. Weston, was a vampire of exceptional character, easy fortune, appealing scent, and eternally suitable age. He had the pale blue-coloured eyes of a vegan who feasted only on animal blood. Emma thought it slightly odd that Mr. Weston requested the wedding be held at midnight. The guests struggled to stay awake, but since Mr. Weston never slept, he was quite alert throughout the ceremony.

How was Emma to bear the loss of Miss Taylor? With whom would she now share an intimate acquaintance? She dearly loved her father, but he was no companion for her. He could not equal her in conversation, and the disparity in their ages was much increased by his having been a hypochondriac all his life. And with the recent vampire attacks, he was quite fearful of leaving home.

Emma's sister Isabella, being settled in London sixteen miles off, was much too distant for daily contact. Many a long October and November evening must be endured at Hartfield before Christmas brought the next visit from Isabella, her husband, and their little children to fill the house and give her pleasant company again.

Highbury, the large and populous village in which Hartfield was located, afforded Emma no possibility of new friends. The Woodhouses were the grandest family in town. All looked up to them. She had many acquaintances, but not one among them who could be considered a replacement for Miss Taylor.

It was a melancholy change losing Miss Taylor, and Emma could only sigh over it. But she needed to act cheerful for her father. He was a nervous man, easily depressed, hating change of every kind. He was still not reconciled to his daughter Isabella's marrying, when he now had to part with Miss Taylor too.

"Poor Miss Taylor! I wish she were here again."

"But Papa, Mr. Weston is such a good-humoured, pleasant, and excellent man that he thoroughly deserves a good wife. We shall often visit with them. We must pay a dinner visit very soon."

"But - "

"What is it, Papa?"

"My dear, you know how I dread leaving the gates of Hartfield. I just heard of another young lady, a boarder at Mrs. Goddard's school, being murdered by a vampire as she walked home from the village, her blood sucked completely dry."

"Yes, Papa, that was tragic indeed. I hope in my heart she was not pretty - it would have been such a waste! That makes the third attack in just a few months. It seems no one is safe in Highbury any more. But we would take the carriage to visit the Westons. That would relieve your worry, would it not?"

"Yes, but - "

"What is it now, Papa?"

"It is just that Mr. Weston - he never eats. We shall arrive at dinner and there will be no food to sustain us."

Emma nodded at her father's wisdom. "Perhaps we ought to visit for tea."

Her father smiled, and Emma hoped that a game of backgammon might help him through the evening.

The backgammon table was set up, but before they could commence, Mr. George Knightley paid a call.

Mr. Knightley was a strikingly handsome vampire who claimed to be thirty-seven but was actually two hundred thirty-seven, with alabaster skin and thick brown hair combed back off his high aristocratic forehead. He had deep purple circles under his eyes from never sleeping.

A traditional vampire who favoured human blood, Mr. Knightley had not feasted for a great while and thus his eyes were black from need of sustenance. Being a gentleman, of course, he would never consider roaming about at night attacking young ladies to whom he had not been properly introduced.

Mr. Knightley was not only an intimate friend of the Woodhouse family but an in-law as well - his younger brother John Knightley was married to Emma's sister Isabella. He lived about a mile from Highbury at his estate, Donwell Abbey. Mr. Knightley was a frequent visitor and always welcome at Hartfield - tonight more welcome than usual, having come directly from John and Isabella's house in London to say that everyone was well there.

His visit this evening cheered Mr. Woodhouse for some time. Mr. Knightley had a reserved but pleasant manner which always did him good. And since his eyes never blinked, he flattered everyone with an uninterrupted gaze. Mr. Woodhouse gratefully observed, "It is very kind of you, Mr. Knightley, to come out at this late hour to call upon us. I am afraid you must have had a shocking walk, with so much danger lurking about."

"Not at all, sir. It is my favourite time of day - a beautiful moonlit night. I now find myself so warm that I must draw back from your great fire." Lest, he thought, I should spontaneously combust into flames.

"But you must have found your walk very damp. I wish you may not catch cold."

"Damp, sir!" exclaimed Mr. Knightley. "I thrive in the dampness and cold. The sun quite disagrees with me. And by the by, I have not wished you joy about the wedding. I trust it all went off well. How did you all behave? Who cried the most?"

"Ah! Poor Miss Taylor!" said Mr. Woodhouse.

"I should think she would indeed be crying on her nuptial night," said Mr. Knightley, "from the anticipation of the coldness of her new husband's - uh, skin. Well, at any rate, Miss Taylor has been accustomed to having two persons to please, sir - you and Emma. She will now have but one - her husband. It must be better to have only one to please than two."

"Especially when one of us is such a fanciful, troublesome creature!" said Emma playfully. "That is what you have in your head, I know. Mr. Knightley loves to find fault with me, Papa - it is all a joke. We always say what we like to one another."

Mr. Knightley was one of the few people who could see faults in Emma Woodhouse. In fact, he seemed to possess a strange ability to look into her mind and discern what she was thinking. He was the only one who ever told Emma of her faults. This was not agreeable to Emma - she wanted to be thought of as perfect by everybody.

"Emma knows I never flatter her," said Mr. Knightley. But she also knew how much he cared. On his advice, Emma now carried a wooden stake under her skirt, tied to her leg with a fashionable pink ribbon. Moreover, he instructed her in its proper use, all the while on tenterhooks that she should ever have occasion to employ the weapon against him. "I know that Emma will miss such a companion as Miss Taylor," continued Mr. Knightley, "but she knows how much joy the marriage brings to her former governess."

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Customer Reviews

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Sort by: Showing all of 15 Customer Reviews
  • Posted August 4, 2010

    more from this reviewer

    readers will enjoy Mr. Josephus' jocular biting of Emma.

    In Highbury, England blue blooded vampires live among the human residents with the latter unaware that some of local gentry are Undead. Daughter of an affluent widower, Emma is especially clueless even though she notices weird dental bites and black curtains, but never puts together another thought as to what that denotes. Instead Emma plays the town's matchmaker until her BFF Harriet Smith declares her love for Mr. Knightly. Emma wants him unaware that his fangs are not due to poor teeth.

    Everything changes when the vampires begin stalking and attacking the town's girls. Not one to remain a spectator, Emma grabs a stake that she ties to her thigh and stalks the Undead.

    With a nod to Steve Hockensmith's Pride and Prejudice and Zombies and a wink at Jane Austen, Wayne Josephson converts Emma into a vampire thriller with stakes and tea. Although everyone knows vampires exist, Emma is terrific as she goes from totally clueless to Regency Buffy like slayer. Although how the Highbury citizens failed to know the bluebloods were Undead is mindful of Los unable to see past Clark's glasses (hypnotic glamour must be super powerful), readers will enjoy Mr. Josephus' jocular biting of Emma.

    Harriet Klausner

    1 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted November 7, 2010

    Great easy read

    Easy reading and a decent spin off of an Austin classic.

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  • Posted September 7, 2010

    Different

    Originally posted at: www.longandshortreviews.blogspot.com ***** Recently, there has been an upsurge of books that are a combination of classic meets modern. In some cases, it is done in a manner that revises material to make it more contemporary. In others, it is created to make a beloved book something far different -- as well as undeniably macabre. It is the latter reason that tweaked my interest to read Emma and the Vampires. The retelling of the much loved Jane Austen tale combined with a merging of creatures that drink blood and wither in the sun was impossible to resist. For the most part, the concept worked. I was excited to meet a newer, feisty Emma who slays vampires while also finding time to match make, and engage in witty exchanges with the ever sexy (if now bloodthirsty) Mr. Knightley. The familiar faces and names were ones I was eager to see. Unfortunately, there was one very obvious difference in the work, and it didn't involve blood sucking or suitors with black eyes and cold body temperatures.

    In Emma, the women who surrounded the too-mischievous-for-her-own good heroine were all clever in their own right. While it is true that they missed certain clues placed before them, I found I couldn't make myself believe these women who were aware vampires existed continually failed to see those gentlemen vampires directly in front of them. As the story progressed, it became rather annoying. Certainly there were portions of the book that caused me to laugh out loud, but more often than not I found myself disappointed at the path the author chose to take.

    However, aside from this, I must confess that I was smitten with Emma and the Vampires. Mr. Knightley as a vampire is most swoon-worthy and the heart of the story remains intact. The writing is also quite good, and stays true to form of the work. I would recommend this book to anyone who is enjoying the newer mash-ups of classics with popular entertainment. Or better yet, encourage those who have never read the book that inspired Emma and the Vampires a chance to entertain you in the reading chair.

    0 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted August 15, 2010

    more from this reviewer

    Bridget's Review

    I like reading the classics but I prefer to read classics with a twist. Joseph's approach of adding vampires to the mix was absolutely brilliant! Reading Emma and the Vampires was an entertaining and exciting experience. I would definitely recommend this book to other readers.

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  • Posted July 21, 2010

    Absolutely amazing!

    I read the first chapter of this book with low expectations, because the vampire fad can get quite tiring. But wow, I was proved wrong. After the first page, I was hooked. I cannot wait to read the whole thing. Wayne Josephson managed to keep the spirit of the original Emma while adding a modern flare. I might even order it on Amazon, so I can read it before it comes out in Barnes and Noble :)

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