Emotional Intelligence: 10th Anniversary Edition; Why It Can Matter More Than IQ / Edition 10

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Overview

Everyone knows that high IQ is no guarantee of success, happiness, or virtue, but until Emotional Intelligence, we could only guess why. Daniel Goleman's brilliant report from the frontiers of psychology and neuroscience offers startling new insight into our "two minds"—the rational and the emotional—and how they together shape our destiny.

Through vivid examples, Goleman delineates the five crucial skills of emotional intelligence, and shows how they determine our success in relationships, work, and even our physical well-being. What emerges is an entirely new way to talk about being smart.

The best news is that "emotional literacy" is not fixed early in life. Every parent, every teacher, every business leader, and everyone interested in a more civil society, has a stake in this compelling vision of human possibility.

From the Trade Paperback edition.

"...explains why empathy, self-awareness, and self- discipline is essential to success and positive human interaction."

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Editorial Reviews

From the Publisher
"A thoughtfully written, persuasive account explaining emotional intelligence and why it can be crucial to your career."—USA Today

"Good news to the employee looking for advancement [and] a wake-up call to organizations and corporations."—The Christian Science Monitor

"Anyone interested in leadership...should get a copy of this book. In fact, I recommend it to all readers anywhere who want to see their organizations in the phone book in the year 2001."—Warren Bennis, The New York Times Book Review

"A thoughtfully written, persuasive account explaining emotional intelligence and why it can be crucial to your career." —USA Today

Publishers Weekly - Publisher's Weekly
This international #1 bestseller, which spent a year on PW's list, explains why EI can be more important than IQ. (July)
Library Journal
Scientific data emerging from studies using new brain imaging technologies have yielded fresh understanding of how emotions work and, argues the author, suggest ways to regulate the more negative emotions responsible for the horrendous acts of violence that are the stuff of daily headlines. The book calls for universal adoption of educational curricula that teach youngsters how to regulate their emotional responses and to resolve conflict peacefully. Along the way Goleman summarizes much of the best psychological work of the last few decades on such topics as the importance of learned optimism, the theory of multiple intelligences, the role of innate temperamental differences, and the importance of emotional intelligence in marriage, management, and medicine. Based on good empirical data (unlike many popular psychology books), this fine example is recommended for academic and larger public libraries.Mary Ann Hughes, Neill P.L., Pullman, Wash.
Booknews
Goleman, psychologist and science writer for The New York Times, explains how the rational and emotional work together to shape intelligence, using intriguing new information from neuroscience and psychology of the brain. Annotation c. Book News, Inc., Portland, OR (booknews.com)
Patricia Hassler
f your class valedictorian did not become the soaring success everyone predicted, perhaps his IQ exceeded his EQ. Psychologist Daniel Goleman's latest book is a fascinating depiction of the role emotional intelligence plays in defining character and determining destiny. He has produced an eminently readable and persuasive work that shows us how to develop our emotional intelligence in ways that can improve our relationships, our parenting, our classrooms, and our workplaces. Goleman assures us that our temperaments may be determined by neurochemistry, but they can be altered. We could turn society on its ear if we learned to recognize our emotions and control our reactions; if we combined our thinking with our feeling; if we learned to follow our flow of feelings in our search for creativity. This well-researched work persuades us to teach our children an important lesson: humanity lies in our feelings, not our facts. This is an engrossing, captivating work that should be read by anyone who wants to improve self, family, or world.
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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9780553804911
  • Publisher: Random House Publishing Group
  • Publication date: 9/26/2006
  • Edition description: 10th Anniversary edition
  • Edition number: 10
  • Pages: 384
  • Sales rank: 99,985
  • Product dimensions: 6.46 (w) x 9.55 (h) x 1.23 (d)

Meet the Author

Daniel Goleman, PH.D. is also the author of the worldwide bestseller Working with Emotional Intelligence and is co-author of Primal Leadership: Learning to Lead with Emotional Intelligence, written with Richard Boyatzis and Annie McKee.

Dr. Goleman received his Ph.D. from Harvard and reported on the brain and behavioral sciences for The New York Times for twelve years, where he was twice nominated for the Pulitzer Prize. He was awarded the American Psychological Association's Lifetime Achievement Award and is currently a Fellow of the American Association for the Advancement of Science His other books include Destructive Emotions, The Meditative Mind, The Creative Spirit, and Vital Lies, Simple Truths.

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Read an Excerpt

The New Yardstick

The rules for work are changing. We're being judged by a new yardstick: not just by how smart we are, or by our training and expertise, but also by how well we handle ourselves and each other. This yardstick is increasingly applied in choosing who will be hired and who will not, who will be let go and who retained, who passed over and who promoted.

The new rules predict who is most likely to become a star performer and who is most prone to derailing. And, no matter what field we work in currently, they measure the traits that are crucial to our marketability for future jobs.

These rules have little to do with what we were told was important in school; academic abilities are largely irrelevant to this standard. The new measure takes for granted having enough intellectual ability and technical know-how to do our jobs; it focuses instead on personal qualities, such as initiative and empathy, adaptability and persuasiveness.

This is no passing fad, nor just the management nostrum of the moment. The data that argue for taking it seriously are based on studies of tens of thousands of working people, in callings of every kind. The research distills with unprecedented precision which qualities mark a star performer. And it demonstrates which human abilities make up the greater part of the ingredients for excellence at work—most especially for leadership.

If you work in a large organization, even now you are probably being evaluated in terms of these capabilities, though you may not know it. If you are applying for a job, you are likely to be scrutinized through this lens, though, again, no one will tell you so explicitly. Whatever your job, understanding how to cultivate these capabilities can be essential for success in your career.

If you are part of a management team, you need to consider whether your organization fosters these competencies or discourages them. To the degree your organizational climate nourishes these competencies, your organization will be more effective and productive. You will maximize your group's intelligence, the synergistic interaction of every person's best talents.

If you work for a small organization or for yourself, your ability to perform at peak depends to a very great extent on your having these abilities—though almost certainly you were never taught them in school. Even so, your career will depend, to a greater or lesser extent, on how well you have mastered these capacities.

In a time with no guarantees of job security, when the very concept of a "job" is rapidly being replaced by "portable skills," these are prime qualities that make and keep us employable. Talked about loosely for decades under a variety of names, from "character" and "personality" to "soft skills" and "competence," there is at last a more precise understanding of these human talents, and a new name for them: emotional intelligence.

A Different Way of Being Smart

"I had the lowest cumulative grade point average ever in my engineering school," the codirector of a consulting firm tells me. "But when I joined the army and went to officer candidate school, I was number one in my class—it was all about how you handle yourself, get along with people, work in teams, leadership. And that's what I find to be true in the world of work."

In other words, what matters is a different way of being smart. In my book Emotional Intelligence, my focus was primarily on education, though a short chapter dealt with implications for work and organizational life.

What caught me by utter surprise—and delighted me—was the flood of interest from the business community. Responding to a tidal wave of letters and faxes, e-mails and phone calls, requests to speak and consult, I found myself on a global odyssey, talking to thousands of people, from CEOs to secretaries, about what it means to bring emotional intelligence to work.

*
• *

This search has taken me back to research I participated in while a graduate student, and then faculty member, at Harvard University. That research was part of an early challenge to the IQ mystique—the false but widely embraced notion that what matters for success is intellect alone. This work helped spawn what has now become a mini-industry that analyzes the actual competencies that make people successful in jobs and organizations of every kind, and the findings are astonishing: IQ takes second position to emotional intelligence in determining outstanding job performance.

Analyses done by dozens of different experts in close to five hundred corporations, government agencies, and nonprofit organizations worldwide have arrived independently at remarkably similar conclusions, and their findings are particularly compelling because they avoid the biases or limits inherent in the work of a single individual or group. Their conclusions all point to the paramount place of emotional intelligence in excellence on the job--in virtually any job.

Some Misconceptions

As I've toured the world talking and consulting with people in business, I've encountered certain widespread misunderstandings about emotional intelligence. Let me clear up some of the most common at the outset. First, emotional intelligence does not mean merely "being nice." At strategic moments it may demand not "being nice," but rather, for example, bluntly confronting someone with an uncomfortable but consequential truth they've been avoiding.

Second, emotional intelligence does not mean giving free rein to feelings—"letting it all hang out." Rather, it means managing feelings so that they are expressed appropriately and effectively, enabling people to work together smoothly toward their common goals.

Also, women are not "smarter" than men when it comes to emotional intelligence, nor are men superior to women. Each of us has a personal profile of strengths and weaknesses in these capacities. Some of us may be highly empathic but lack some abilities to handle our own distress; others may be quite aware of the subtlest shift in our own moods, yet be inept socially.

It is true that men and women as groups tend to have a shared, gender-specific profile of strong and weak points. An analysis of emotional intelligence in thousands of men and women found that women, on average, are more aware of their emotions, show more empathy, and are more adept interpersonally. Men, on the other hand, are more self-confident and optimistic, adapt more easily, and handle stress better.

In general, however, there are far more similarities than differences. Some men are as empathic as the most interpersonally sensitive women, while some women are every bit as able to withstand stress as the most emotionally resilient men. Indeed, on average, looking at the overall ratings for men and women, the strengths and weaknesses average out, so that in terms of total emotional intelligence, there are no sex differences.

Finally, our level of emotional intelligence is not fixed genetically, nor does it develop only in early childhood. Unlike IQ, which changes little after our teen years, emotional intelligence seems to be largely learned, and it continues to develop as we go through life and learn from our experiences—our competence in it can keep growing. In fact, studies that have tracked people's level of emotional intelligence through the years show that people get better and better in these capabilities as they grow more adept at handling their own emotions and impulses, at motivating themselves, and at honing their empathy and social adroitness. There is an old-fashioned word for this growth in emotional intelligence: maturity.

Why This Matters Now

At a California biotech start-up, the CEO proudly enumerated the features that made his organization state-of-the-art: No one, including him, had a fixed office; instead, everyone carried a small laptop—their mobile office—and was wired to everyone else. Job titles were irrelevant; employees worked in cross-functional teams and the place bubbled with creative energy. People routinely put in seventy- and eighty-hour work weeks.

"So what's the downside?" I asked him.

"There is no downside," he assured me.

And that was the fallacy. Once I was free to talk with staff members, I heard the truth: The hectic pace had people feeling burned out and robbed of their private lives. And though everyone could talk via computer to everyone else, people felt that no one was truly listening to them.

People desperately felt the need for connection, for empathy, for open communication.

In the new, stripped-down, every-job-counts business climate, these human realities will matter more than ever. Massive change is a constant; technical innovations, global competition, and the pressures of institutional investors are ever-escalating forces for flux.

Another reality makes emotional intelligence ever more crucial: As organizations shrink through waves of downsizing, those people who remain are more accountable—and more visible. Where earlier a midlevel employee might easily hide a hot temper or shyness, now competencies such as managing one's emotions, handling encounters well, teamwork, and leadership, show—and count--more than ever.

The globalization of the workforce puts a particular premium on emotional intelligence in wealthier countries. Higher wages in these countries, if they are to be maintained, will depend on a new kind of productivity. And structural fixes or technological advances alone are not enough: As at the California biotech firm, streamlining or other innovations often create new problems that cry out for even greater emotional intelligence.

As business changes, so do the traits needed to excel. Data tracking the talents of star performers over several decades reveal that two abilities that mattered relatively little for success in the 1970s have become crucially important in the 1990s: team building and adapting to change. And entirely new capabilities have begun to appear as traits of star performers, notably change catalyst and leveraging diversity. New challenges demand new talents.


A Coming Crisis: Rising IQ, Dropping EQ

Since 1918, when World War I brought the first mass use of IQ tests on American army recruits, the average IQ score in the United States has risen 24 points, and there has been a similar rise in developed countries around the world. The reasons include better nutrition, more children completing more schooling, computer games and puzzles that help children master spatial skills, and smaller family size (which generally correlates with higher IQ scores in children).

There is a dangerous paradox at work, however: As children grow ever smarter in IQ, their emotional intelligence is on the decline. Perhaps the most disturbing single piece of data comes from a massive survey of parents and teachers that shows the present generation of children to be more emotionally troubled than the last. On average, children are growing more lonely and depressed, more angry and unruly, more nervous and prone to worry, more impulsive and aggressive.

Two random samples of American children, age seven to sixteen, were evaluated by their parents and teachers—adults who knew them well. The first group was assessed in the mid-1970s, and a comparable group was surveyed in the late 1980s. Over that decade and a half there was a steady worsening of children's emotional intelligence. Although poorer children started out at a lower level on average, the rate of decline was the same across all economic groups—as steep in the wealthiest suburbs as in the poorest inner-city slum.

Dr. Thomas Achenbach, the University of Vermont psychologist who did these studies—and who has collaborated with colleagues on similar assessments in other nations—tells me that the decline in children's basic emotional competencies seems to be worldwide. The most telling signs of this are seen in rising rates among young people of problems such as despair, alienation, drug abuse, crime and violence, depression or eating disorders, unwanted pregnancies, bullying, and dropping out of school.

What this portends for the workplace is quite troubling: growing deficiencies among workers in emotional intelligence, particularly among those newest to the job. Most of the children that Achenbach studied in the late 1980s will be in their twenties by the year 2000. The generation that is falling behind in emotional intelligence is entering the workforce today.

From the Trade Paperback edition.

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Table of Contents

Part One: The Emotional Brain
Chapter 1: What Are Emotions For? ..... 3
Chapter 2: Anatomy of an Emotional Hijacking ..... 13
Part Two: The Nature of Emotional Intelligence
Chapter 3: When Smart is Dumb ..... 33
Chapter 4: Know Thyself ..... 46
Chapter 5: Passion's Slaves ..... 56
Chapter 6: The Master Aptitude ..... 78
Chapter 7: The Roots of Empathy ..... 96
Chapter 8: The Social Arts ..... 111
Part Three: Emotional Intelligence Applied
Chapter 9: Intimate Enemies ..... 129
Chapter 10: Managing with Heart ..... 148
Chapter 11: Mind and Medicine ..... 164
Part Four: Windows of Opportunity
Chapter 12: The Family Crucible ..... 189
Chapter 13: Trauma and Emotional Relearning ..... 200
Chapter 14: Temperament Is Not Destiny ..... 215
Part Five: Emotional Literacy
Chapter 15: The Cost of Emotional Illiteracy ..... 231
Chapter 16: Schooling the Emotions ..... 261
Appendix A: What is Emotion? ..... 289
Appendix B: Hallmarks of the Emotional Mind ..... 291
Appendix C: The Neural Circuitry of Fear ..... 297
Appendix D: W.T. Grant Consortium: Active Ingredients of Prevention Programs ..... 301
Appendix E: The Self Science Curriculum ..... 303
Appendix F: Social and Emotional Learning: Results ..... 305
Notes ..... 311
Acknowledgements ..... 341
Index ..... 343
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Reading Group Guide

1. Emotional Intelligence proposes that empathy and other emotional skills can be taught--and that schools should teach students how to handle and express their emotions appropriately. However, a Time magazine cover story about emotional intelligence argued that, "The danger is that any campaign to hone emotional skills in children will end up teaching that there is a 'right' emotional response for any given situation." Do you believe it's appropriate--or possible--for schools to teach emotional skills to students? If parents don't teach these skills, and schools shouldn't, who should?

2. The book portrays a society suffering from a breakdown of emotional intelligence. It cites the following statistics: Violent crimes by young people are up by a factor of four over the past 20 years. Suicides have tripled among young people in the same period, and forcible rape has doubled. Though he acknowledges that factors such as poverty play a role in the creation of violent criminals, Dr. Goleman says, "Every time we read about another senseless murder, it's a sign of emotional intelligence gone awry." What current or recent events in the news strike you as possible examples of emotional illiteracy? Do you believe there's hope for improving our collective social life by teaching emotional skills to individuals?

3. Are women more emotionally intelligent than men? Dr. Goleman doesn't believe so. He finds that each gender has its emotional strengths and weaknesses. Women are trained to be more empathetic--thus, they are often better than men are at picking up "the subtle, unspoken emotional dimension" of communication. On the other hand, women are treated for depression at twice therate men are. Men are often better at managing their moods--a key component of emotional intelligence. What other patterns of strength and weakness might be attributed to the sexes, respectively? Do you believe boys should be trained to be more aware of others' moods? Do you think girls could be given skills that would help them be more optimistic? Do you believe there are innate differences in the emotional capacities of the genders?

4. Contrary to popular wisdom, Emotional Intelligence argues that venting anger--by yelling, for instance--can cause more harm than good. The author believes catharsis has an undeserved popularity as a method of handling anger. He cites studies which show that the net effect of lashing out is to prolong rage rather than to end it. Do you think it's desirable--or possible--to avoid emotional displays of anger? In what other ways can extreme frustration be expressed? Have you ever regretted an unplanned outburst of rage? Ever seen a tantrum produce a desired result?

5. According to the author, emotions are impulses which compel us toward--or away from--various courses of action. "Formal logic alone can never work as the basis for deciding who to marry or trust or even what job to take; these are the realms where reason without feeling is blind." He believes that gut reactions and intuitions are more than mere momentary whims, that they are sophisticated calculations based on a quick-but-careful review of past experience. Are your important life decisions based more on rationality, or on an emotion-based "gut instinct?" Can you recall any occasion when an instantaneous decision reached by your emotional circuitry steered you right ... or wrong?

6. A previous bestselling book, The Bell Curve, asserts that one's intellectual capacities are fixed: The Bell Curve's authors claim there's no way to transcend the IQ you were born with. Emotional Intelligence defines intelligence more broadly, positing that there is an emotional brain which greatly influences the workings of the rational brain, that both contribute to one's level of intelligence, and that emotional skills can be improved on. Which view of intelligence do you find more valid, and why?

7. Tests of aspects of emotional intelligence, such as "The Marshmallow Test, " have proven to be strong predictors of future success. Some four-year-olds who took "The Marshmallow Test" were able to restrain their desire for a treat in favor of a greater reward later. This triumph over the urge for immediate gratification turned out to have a far-reaching impact later in life. As high-school seniors, those who had "passed" the test "were more academically competent: better able to put their ideas into words, to use and respond to reason, to concentrate, to make plans and follow through on them, and more eager to learn. Most astonishingly, they had dramatically higher scores on their SAT tests." Given such evidence that emotional skills affect one's capacity for success, do you believe children should be given standardized tests which measure not just IQ, but also emotional intelligence?

8. The book offers compelling evidence that parents' degree of emotional skill goes far toward determining their childrens' level of emotional intelligence. Can you recall ways in which your parents enhanced or deterred the development of any of the five components of emotional intelligence (self-awareness; emotional control; self-motivation; empathy; handling relationships) in you or your siblings?

9. Empathy is a key component of emotional intelligence; sensitivity to others' feelings is a prerequisite to developing strong relationships. Researchers believe that 90% of emotional communication is non-verbal. What are some examples of unspoken cues people use to express their feelings?

10. Dr. Goleman says modern medical care often lacks emotional intelligence. "Medicine's inattention to the impact of emotions on illness neglects a growing body of evidence which indicates that emotional states can play a significant role in vulnerability to disease and in the course of their recovery." He claims that "there are many ways medicine can incorporate new knowledge about the impact of emotions on health into its view of patient care." Have you, or has someone you know, experienced emotional insensitivity at the hands of medical professionals? How far should the health-care delivery system go in concerning itself with patients' emotion?

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Customer Reviews

Average Rating 4.5
( 36 )
Rating Distribution

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(21)

4 Star

(9)

3 Star

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2 Star

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1 Star

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See All Sort by: Showing 1 – 20 of 26 Customer Reviews
  • Anonymous

    Posted October 5, 2009

    I Also Recommend:

    Emotional Intelligence 2.0 is better

    When this book came out in 1995 it was earth shattering for a lot of people, myself included, and I've enjoyed it and learned from it immensely since then. It details why IQ is not the sole predictor of success, and it reviews powerful academic studies that show how emotional intelligence impacts important life outcomes. Fifteen years have passed though, and the book has become outdated. It also doesn't show you how to improve your EQ, which is something that researchers have discovered how to do during the last decade. Emotional Intelligence 2.0 was published in the second half of 2009 (I just got it) and I love what it does. 2.0 has a step-by-step program that I used to increase my emotional intelligence, as well as access to an online emotional intelligence test that showed me where I need to improve. Emotional intelligence has finally come full circle!

    7 out of 7 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Posted October 28, 2011

    Brilliant and Beautifully Written

    This book is not new but is a must read for every human being. It may start out seeming like a biology lesson on the brain, but this lesson is critical to understand the physiology of emotions. This book describes the breakthrough in studies on human behavior and demonstrates the link between ineptitude and emotions. This book should be read by all parents because parents shape the emotional intelligence of their children. Emotions are our life. They are what we live with day and day out. This book explains why it is important to understand our emotions if we want to understand ourselves and why we do what we do in our lives.

    1 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted February 10, 2010

    I Also Recommend:

    The Foundation for All Other Emotional Intelligence Books

    Having covered most of the literature on emotional intelligence (EI), this book continues to be the seminal manuscript for outlining the rationale for learning and practicing EI. It's even more relevant today in 2010 as we move to a broader global economy where social skills and cultural awareness increase in significance. You can't go wrong by beginning your study of emotional intelligence with this book. It will make any follow-up you do even easier to comprehend.

    1 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted August 6, 2005

    Provocative

    One of the things the author points out in this book is the importance that hopefullness and a positve outlook play in the success or failure of living. What he fails to do is provide a real sense of either by falling into the trap of overestimating the importance that genetics and early childhood experiences have on ones emotional makeup. Granted, he does point out that those of us who may have been born with less than optimal temperment further [messed] up by poor parenting and childhood trauma, can relearn or overcome these hindereances (although there doesn't really seem to be much written on how to) he goes on to offer study after study of how you either have it or don't by the age of 4! Overall, it had some very interesting tidbits in it, like how monkey's behave and show empathy for fellow creatures, and how good parenting skills can help children have better emotional skills (as if any intelligent person hasn't figured that out yet!) but there isn't much here on how to cultivate good emotional health and heal from emotional damage. Perhaps that wasn't really the focus of this book, but rather it was to point out the importance of emotional intelligence, leaving the opportunity to write another book, on how to cultivate it.

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted January 12, 2004

    Emotional Evolution???

    This book could have been good if it wasn't so wrapped up in evolution. Although some views appear to be well thought out, the over all message is diluted with theories that are not proven. This tends to discredit the book as a whole. Understanding emotions is key to healthy living but, how does one calculate the capacity for emotions throughout the history of humankind? Why is their no mention of where emotions began, remember the amoeba? This happened right after the acid rain wash over the rock. Overall, I am disappointed in spending money for this book. It sounds like the author is stuck in the religion of the public school system which is unfortunate because some good ideas are wasted.

    1 out of 3 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted December 23, 2009

    Amazing!

    When I first started reading this book, i could relate directly to what it said. This is a lot more than i could do for other books. i had the origional library copy, but i bought this one. The concept is amazing, suggesting that EQ not IQ is the big determiner of success. And if you think about it, Daniel Goleman is compleatly correct!
    I give this 5 stars

    0 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted July 6, 2009

    Mind Blowing!

    An insightful read for anyone interested in the brain, relationships, or simply understanding yourself.

    0 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted May 14, 2008

    The foundation for a revolution that could save our world and the future of our children.

    AWESOME... especially liked the section on page 210 about emotional relearning and recovery from trauma. This should be taught in every school system at all grades and in preschool. It brings great hope for a better future and better world.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted July 3, 2007

    Content is interesting, but audio is odd

    I'm wondering if there is a production problem with the audio CD. It genuinely sounds as if it's being read by a computer, with an odd separation between the words. It makes it very difficult to focus on 'what' is being said.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted March 31, 2006

    Explains how the brain processes emotions

    I enjoyed this book because I learned how the brain processes feelings, and why I shut down when I am overwhelmed. I had always believed that high IQ people were the most successful, but this book made me realize the importance of emotional intelligence. I certainly recommend this book and another, Optimal Thinking: How To Be Your Best Self, which helped me to understand each disturbing feeling and how to best resolve them. Buy both books to optimize your emotional life.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted March 21, 2006

    Sports emotions

    It's like all my college and high school coaches said - 'Emotions are a part of the game'. This book is invaluable even though i had one boss who thought it was all rot if it wasn't hard science. He had never played team sports that well. Even so, the book tell us men that we need to recognize our emotions and those of others and not be so brutish and competitive in our daily lives as we build good solid teams at work.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted September 22, 2003

    Already of historical significance!

    This book was only written a few years ago but it is already a classic! It opened the eyes of our culture to another side of human consciousness anf functioning. Although we still have a long way to go in developing a full understanding of the emotional aspects of ourselves, this book provided us an wonderful opportunity to move in that direction. The book that has taken us one more step in that direction is 'The Ever-Transcending Spirit' by Toru Sato. Though Goleman's book helped me become more aware of this aspect of myself, reading Sato's book has increased my emotional intelligence level immensely! Both books are essential readings for the evolution of our consciousness.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted January 19, 2003

    A must read!

    If you haven't read this book by now, read it! This book tells us how most of us are not really grasping what is truly important in life. Daniel Goleman says that emotional intelligence is a lot more important than if you can do math, spell correctly, fix a lawnmower, or build a spaceship. The author explains that this type of intelligence is so underemphasized in our society even though it is so needed. We live in a world where people can build weapons of mass destruction but can not keep a marriage together. I loved this book. Another book I loved is Rhythm, Relationships, and Transcendence by Toru Sato. He takes a similar approach and applies it to interpersonal relationships. Let's all learn and move to the next step in our evolution! I loved these books!

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  • Anonymous

    Posted February 14, 2003

    First rate book for acknowledging the value of emotions

    I like Daniel Goleman's explanation of emotional intelligence. As so many of our decisions are emotionally based, it is imperative that we understand the value of emotions and how to intelligently deal with them. My favorite book on emotional intelligence is Optimal Thinking -- How to Be Your Best Self by Rosalene Glickman, Ph.D. She offers a roadmap to deal with disturbing emotions, and a roadmap for specific emotions. She shows you how to use emotions as optimization signals. If you read both books, you'll have it all.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted October 18, 2002

    Intelligence Comes in Different Forms, not just IQ (Cognitive Intelligence)

    Daniel Goleman refers to ¿a growing body of evidence showing that success in school depends to a surprising extent on emotional characteristics formed in the years BEFORE a child enters school.¿ Having been a preschool teacher for many years, I must agree. So much of what determines how a child is going to fit into the world depends on his strengths (not weaknesses) along with his degree of self-esteem (not necessarily his IQ or SAT scores). This book is a must for all parents, especially those who feel their child simply does not compare to the "kid next door"...you know, the one who seems to be good at everything. Although that may be true, Goleman says that by nuturing and teaching to the Emotional Intelligence and strengths of your child, the chance of success in future years will be increased. ALL children have the ability to accomplish goals. Maybe your child is extremely good in his interpersonal skills--well-liked by his peers and blessed with the gift of gab and a great sense of humor. These are perfect qualities for a successful salesman. The fact that a child does not test well in math or written English skills and has a very average IQ is not directly significant in how successful he will become as a salesman. Those kids that excel in the arts may enjoy huge success in a career as an actor, artist, film producer, or photographer, especially if his Emotional Intelligence is high. In addition to giving a child unconditional love, I feel it is our job as good parents to identify our children's strengths in the early years and give them plenty of chances to experience challenges, accomplishment, and joy in those areas. Along with this excellent theoretical book, I highly recommend for those of you who have young children, a very practical little book called "The Pocket Parent." This quick-read A-Z guide will give you many specific strategies for increasing the Emotional Intelligence of your 2- to 5-year-old through daily communication and activites. By following the advice of these two books, you will help your child learn how to better interact with others, solve problems, and develop empathy, while maintaining a good sense of self-worth just the way s/he is.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted September 7, 2002

    EloQuent and UnEQuivocably Useful

    I'm an EQ coach for individuals and corporations -- that's how much I love this book. It does a good run-through of neuroscience -- you may finally understand once and for all that you can "manage" emotions but you cannot "control" them, i.e., through an act of will. Emotions take primacy over intellect because they are more important to our survival. Which brings up the IQ/EQ debate, which doesn't interest me much. It's a "no brainer" that if you had two people of equal IQ, expertise, education, skills and experience, you would choose the one you'd rather work with, and that would be the one with the higher EQ. We need both IQ and EQ - all 3 of our brains need to be present, accounted for and functioning together. "Which one's more important-IQ or EQ" sells books but has little relevance to our daily lives -- heck, just like everything else, don't you want as much of a good thing as you can get??? I'll take as much of both as I can get! However, EQ is the only one I'll get a second shot at! So, back to why I love the book. It's nonintrusive and it gives solutions. What was a person to do when told "you have no social skills," or "you don't know how to get along," and have an authority conflict suggested? Who doesn't have an authority conflict? And what does it mean - I don't know how to get along? By breaking down emotional intelligence into bite-sized pieces - 14+/- competencies, the way is clear for assessing, teaching and learning. It's great to read about emotional intelligence, and take courses, but to change your EI you have to practice it. Harvard Business Review strongly supports coaching to learn it. It's a 'limbic' thing to learn new social/emotional ways, which takes massive amounts of repetition, practice, support from another person in a social/emotional relationship, and feedback. I'm not qualified to work on the authority figure thing; besides, I'm optimistic (an EQ competency). People can learn this stuff. I've helped 'em do it.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted May 21, 2002

    Emotional intelligence is 50% of our professional success

    I am fascinated with the book, 'excellent indeed'. It is easy to understand no matter if you are a professional or not. It gives a big key which allow us to understand ourserlves better, our behavior, our feelings, our reactions, etc... It personally helped me to understand many of my hidden questions. And it also propose a solution about how to become better humans inmersed in a society that is lost with many troubles but the emotions. Knowing how to handle our emotions, bring us a big view of how we can be mentally healthy, which will help us to interact with society, since our family relations to our work relations, etc..... I recommend this book, quite interesting indeed ! = )

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  • Anonymous

    Posted May 14, 2002

    Cool, Cool, and More Cool

    Daniel Goleman is a humane man. He wrote a wise and beautiful book entitled, Emotional Intelligence. I thoroughly enjoyed it. I have been very upset in my life, I have lost control, I have been abused. I recommend Emotional Intelligence for its scholarship and readability. I even bought Working With Emotional Intelligence, the sequel. Mr. Goleman states the overwhelming problem for the prospect of 'emotional intelligence' winning out in the environments we inhabit: 'These are times when the fabric of society seems to unravel at ever-greater speed, when selfishness, violence, and a meanness of spirit seem to be rotting the goodness of our communal lives.' Later on, in chapter 10, he calls that the 'new competitive reality,' which is harming the harmony of the workplace. Bingo! Too many people feel that they cannot exercise their emotions skillfully or take rational, thoughtful control of situations because other persons' cruelty and callousness will not allow the emotionally safe way to prevail. There is clearly a lack of social support in all manner of communities for Mr. Goleman's skills to succeed to any great degree. Sincere people lose will and patience to keep judging empathetically and tolerantly. Emotioanl Intelligence is helpful for people who want to lead full lives. Overreacting and reckless behavior can ruin a lot of futures for people. Keep calm, understand the 'emotional hijacking' experience, find balance between reason and emotion, Mr. Goleman counsels us. Mr. Goleman explains clearly the bugaboos that assault our consciousness on a daily basis and he offers practical tips on how to maintain mastery over these distresses. For example, 'cognitive reframing' is a wonderful antidote to depression. The book also deals with practical applications of his concept of 'emotional intelligence' exploring its use in marriages, workplaces, medical settings, trauma and family relationships. Through all his treatment, we can gain greater insight into the complex interrelationships between our emotions and our rational sides. Consider this interesting point: 'Experience, particularly in childhood, sculpts the brain.' The school of hard knocks has a cumulative ill effect. Conversely, appropriate affection can nurture caring and productive adults. Aside from the appendices, Mr. Goleman finishes his book with a blueprint for hope. Keep the faith, folks. Emotional literacy can be taught and instilled in our students. We can improve our children's emotional selves with classes like 'Self Science' at the Nueva Learning Center in San Francisco. The United States definitely needs more Self Science curricula woven into the students' lives, students from all backgrounds and walks of life. Thus, the quality of American life would vastly improve. Truly I see immense hope in providing our nation's children with timely emotional instruction. Glad to say, Mr. Goleman ends his book with a statement that agrees with my assessment of the 'emotional intelligence' enterprise. Guns are in our teenagers' hands because there is not enough implementation of emotional competence programs in our nations's schools. Keep the faith!

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  • Anonymous

    Posted January 20, 2002

    Emotional Intelligence

    Emotional Intelligence is an important work. It covers the deeper issues of interpersonal relationships in our lives. You will find a discussion on why emotional intelligence in crucial to successful interactions with friends, family, and the public. It discusses the results of not employing emotional intelligence, and the benefits of using it. It is very thoroughly written, so I suggest setting enough time asside to complete reading it. It took me a while to finish.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted March 15, 2002

    Packed with Knowledge!

    In this seminal work, Daniel Goleman introduced millions of readers to the concept of emotional intelligence ¿ the amalgamation of psychological skills and traits that he claims accounts for 80% of success in life. Skills like self-awareness and self-motivation are instilled (or destroyed) in childhood, but Goleman claims that even adults can learn them and apply them to marriage, business and education. This book is at its best in making the general case for EI by providing a sound biological underpinning. Although later sections on real-world application cannot keep up in terms of insight, we from getAbstract strongly recommend this important book, which is relevant not only to business life, but to life itself.

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