Fashionably Dead in Diapers

Fashionably Dead in Diapers

4.9 48
by Robyn Peterman, Jessica Almasy
     
 

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And I thought being half Vampyre/half Demon was hard.... That's nothing compared to being a mother. Sweet baby Moses in a boob tube, there aren't any books on raising True Immortals, so let me give you a few tips....

Make a map of every closet and bathroom in your home if you enjoy having sex. Sleep deprivation can cause confusion, and a map will help if you

Overview

And I thought being half Vampyre/half Demon was hard.... That's nothing compared to being a mother. Sweet baby Moses in a boob tube, there aren't any books on raising True Immortals, so let me give you a few tips....

Make a map of every closet and bathroom in your home if you enjoy having sex. Sleep deprivation can cause confusion, and a map will help if you have only seven minutes and 31 seconds. You're welcome.

Parenting books are useless if you're not human. If your child is half Vampyre/half Demon, I would suggest not using parenting books at all - they can backfire like a mother humper. Trust me on this.

Have sex.

When your child tells you he has an imaginary friend, do not discount this as fantasy. Oftentimes your child isn't imagining anything. If he persists with alarming and violent stories about this fictional buddy, it's probably a Troll. Do a thorough search of your home, and kill it. Decapitation works best. Some imaginary friends are harmless. However, it's wise not to take chances.

Have sex again.

When in large crowds, make sure you hold tight to your child's hand. Losing a child in an amusement park is terrifying. If you're truly paranoid, you could consider putting a chip in your child. If you do this, don't discuss it at dinner parties. People will think you are weird.

At least cuddle.

Playing with dolls is fun. Being one? No so much. If your child ever finds a Genie in a bottle, flush it immediately. Many children wish for things that are very difficult to reverse...like being doll sized. If this happens, move to Oz. There are many people of small stature there. And yes, it really does exist.

Find a closet, and go to town.

Product Details

ISBN-13:
9781536607741
Publisher:
Brilliance Audio
Publication date:
09/27/2016
Series:
Hot Damned Series , #4
Edition description:
Unabridged
Product dimensions:
5.25(w) x 6.75(h) x 0.50(d)

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Fashionably Dead in Diapers (Hot Damned Series, #4) 4.9 out of 5 based on 0 ratings. 48 reviews.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Another insanely funny book. Love the Hot Damned Series. Cant wait for the next one
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
These books are so funny. Loved getting another great love story from Ethan and Astrid. Live Samuel and SuSu. Can't wait to read the next one.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
I LOVED this book you are the best author in the WORLD if I could give you a higher star I would keep on doing books about Astrid and Ethan and Samuel and I love your books
scambra More than 1 year ago
Oh.My.Hell, Robyn Peterman has done it again! She's succeeded in making me laugh my ass off (I wish)! Only warning, do not read this after having a 2 day stomach bug. She can dream up some truly craptastic visuals that will leave you in tears!
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Extremely funny! The characters are so original. I can't wait for the next book.
Marie1MB More than 1 year ago
Another freaking AWESOMELY OUTRAGEOUS book by Robyn Peterman! In fact, so far in this series, this may very well be my favorite. I LOVE the freaking characters that Robyn creates, both new and old in this book. In Fashionably Dead in Diapers we get to see Samuel, Astrid's and Ethan's baby who has some seriously wicked and amazing powers. He can do SOOOO much more then an average human baby and he did things that made me laugh my butt off! When he gets kidnapped Astrid and Ethan and some of their close allies, go on some hilarious adventures to get him back. I laughed and nearly wet myself from how freaking funny and entertaining I found this book. It was so good I swear I might be rereading this in the next few days just so I can read all the fun all over again. If you haven't read this book yet or any of the Hot Damned Series by Robyn Peterman then I suggest you hightail it to Amazon or Barnes and Noble or itunes and get your copies TODAY!! 
ArizonaJo More than 1 year ago
Fashionably Dead in Diapers by Robyn Peterman is the 4th book in her Hot Damned series and was another winner. It was so good to meet Samuel, who has powers that are out of this world - literally and visit with Astrid, Ethan, The Kev, Mother Nature and all of the other secondary characters in Robyn's world. I laughed till I cried thanks to Robyn's characters and their zany adventures. Samuel is one unique baby and this is a story that you don't want to miss in this series. I loved it and look forward to what Robyn may have in store for all of her fans in the next book.
Jedivampsnfey More than 1 year ago
So good. I love books that have a lot of action. This book was full of it. Between the creative things the baby could conjure up to the non-stop antics Astrid got herself into trying to save those she loved, it was non stop. I love how each book has such an original idea. It's great. Everyone from the last books makes an appearance but it's more Astrids adventure to save her family. Oh , one last thing just have to love the way swear words are ok because of their non- offensive meaning. Lol.
kimamhill More than 1 year ago
Astrid and Ethan's child, Samual, is awesome! This book had me laughing so hard at times, and at other times on the edge of my seat. Talking about the dysfunctional family! This series has been amazing since book one and I am stoked for even more! Great job Robyn!
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Paranomal romance that will make you smile.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Would you like a series with a lot of laughs and guessing? Then by all means grab and read. Each book is a cannot put down and will leave you wanting more.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
This book is another hilariously warped story by a very imaginative author. A super book !!!
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
All were good books
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
I've really enjoyed every book in the series and can't wait for more!!!
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Robyn Peterman can write witty, clever, and insanely hilarious to no end. All of her characters are wonderfully defined, and impossible not to love. Many many kudos! Amanda
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Love the series! B & N Made it so easy to purchase on line. Love the on-line store cause I LOVE TO READ!
Tiffany_Dover57 More than 1 year ago
I absolutely LOVE Robyn Peterman's books! Her writing style is so unique. It's funny, sometimes irreverent, and considering the crazy things that happen, very real. Book 4 in the Hot Damned series is no exception. How would you react if you left your baby with loved ones for a night out and came back to find him kidnapped? You'd be a tornado. A force to be reckoned with. That's Astrid. There's no more hesitation when she gets into questionable situations, her kid is missing and nobody will get in the way of her getting him back. The adventures are great, the old familiar characters are back, plus lots of new ones to love or hate. Once you pick up one of Robyn's books, you won't be able to put it down until you've finished. It's a fangtastic addition to this series. If you haven't read any of them, start with #1, you will quickly be purchasing the entire series. Be warned.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Amazing,i must reccomend!!
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Very cute story, for adults only but still funny. It was nice not having gramar or spelling errors, i may not be able to spell welk but can spot most misspelled words...lol
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
*
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Once again, an outstanding read. Perfect blend of spice, sass and hilarity. A laugh-out-loud reading afventure. Robyn nailed it!
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
This whole series is funny and well written
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Hysterical!