Fat Vampire [NOOK Book]

Overview

PRAISE FOR FAT VAMPIRE

"Truly original and a very fun, witty take on the "done to death" vampire story."

"If Eric Northman ever gets staked, Reginald Baskin will be my new favorite vampire."

"Got the book just before bed... Next thing I knew it was the wee hours of the night... It was impossible to put down."

+++++

When overweight treadmill salesman Reginald Baskin finally meets a co-worker who doesn't make fun of him, it's just his own bad ...

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Fat Vampire

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Overview

PRAISE FOR FAT VAMPIRE

"Truly original and a very fun, witty take on the "done to death" vampire story."

"If Eric Northman ever gets staked, Reginald Baskin will be my new favorite vampire."

"Got the book just before bed... Next thing I knew it was the wee hours of the night... It was impossible to put down."

+++++

When overweight treadmill salesman Reginald Baskin finally meets a co-worker who doesn't make fun of him, it's just his own bad luck that tech guy Maurice turns out to be a two thousand-year-old vampire.

And when Maurice turns Reginald to save his life, it's just Reginald's own further bad luck that he wakes up to discover he's become the slowest, weakest, most out-of-shape vampire ever born, doomed to "heal" to his corpulent self for all of eternity.

As Reginald struggles with the downsides of being a fat vampire -- too slow to catch people to feed on, mocked by those he tries to glamour, assaulted by his intended prey and left for undead -- he discovers in himself rare powers that few vampires have… and just in time too, because the Vampire Council might just want his head for being an inferior representative of their race.

Fat Vampire is the story of an unlikely hero who, after having an imperfect eternity shoved into his grease-stained hands, must learn to turn the afterlife's lemons into tasty lemon danishes.

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Product Details

  • BN ID: 2940044415652
  • Publisher: Johnny B. Truant
  • Publication date: 3/30/2013
  • Sold by: Smashwords
  • Format: eBook
  • Sales rank: 8,471
  • File size: 220 KB

Meet the Author

Johnny B. Truant blogs about entrepreneurship and human potential at JohnnyBTruant.com and is a regular contributor to premier business blogs Copyblogger and Problogger. He’s also the director and MC of the Virtual Ticket program for Blogworld (the world’s preeminent new media conference) and co-hosts the Self Publishing Podcast at SelfPublishingPodcast.com.
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Customer Reviews

Average Rating 5
( 20 )
Rating Distribution

5 Star

(16)

4 Star

(4)

3 Star

(0)

2 Star

(0)

1 Star

(0)

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Sort by: Showing all of 20 Customer Reviews
  • Anonymous

    Posted April 25, 2013

    Surprise!

    400 pages. Ok, it drug a bit at first. I kept going and it got better! Poor Reginald, turned into a vampire and still fat and not all that attractive. What he didn't gain in looks, he gained in smarts and uses it to full ability. This is going to be a 6 book series. Im down for it, ready for book 2. This series isn't Twilight, so don't look for that. A bit depressing, failure as a guy and as a vampire will do that. I expected little or nothing from this book and got a funny new twist on the subject of vampires. Evidently, they are not perfect either. Give this book a try. I did and Im looking forward to book 2. Oh, and no sparkles!

    6 out of 6 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted July 17, 2013

    So good!

    I didn't expect much from this free book but I gotta say it had me since the first chapter. It was funny, hilarious, visual and different. I'm not someone who's into vampires but I enjoyed reading this different take in a unique vampire. I enjoyed the writing style very much. I will say that when it ended it was quite a cliffhanger, I was left disappointed in the night and the next morning bought the rest of the series. If you are in the mood for a humourous book with a different take of vampires, get this one! You won't be disappointed. I just started book 2 and I'm plowing through it.

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted May 28, 2013

    Absolutely loved this book!  Wasn't expecting much, but I found

    Absolutely loved this book!  Wasn't expecting much, but I found it very enjoyable, and funny!  " Come down here.  Look in my eyes", 
    This got me right there, best part of the book, laughed at this all day long!  Won't tell you more, let you  find out for yourselves.  Hope
    all enjoy Reginald, I sure did....  

    1 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted March 19, 2014

    more from this reviewer

    I have to say that this book was hilarious, smart and just plain

    I have to say that this book was hilarious, smart and just plain good. Reginald is a fat vampire who has to deal with more than his fair share of problems. I loved the characters and the writing style. I would recommend this to anyone who enjoys the lighter side of the paranormal genre.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted February 26, 2014

    Best story I've read in a long time

    I don't always give five stars, but when I do, I prefer my stories to look like this. It has everyting: well placed humor, unexpected but not improbable twists, angst, love, and character development. And if that wasn't enough, he does it so succintly that I wonder why boooks need to be 200-300 pages in the first place. Loved every minute. I hope the next installment blows me away just as much.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted January 11, 2014

    Loved it. Made me laugh at times & had me holding my breatth

    Loved it. Made me laugh at times & had me holding my breatth at other times.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted January 4, 2014

    Amazing.

    Fat Vampire is a hilarious book. I read it out of curiosity due to the title and found it impossible to put down. Amazing book in everyone, and deffinetly a nice break from the sparkly trash vampires have turned into.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted December 3, 2013

    Loved it!

    I've read the whole series and really enjoyed it. Very funny! For you prudes and nuns out there--be forewarned, this book contains sex, swearing, blood/gore, and total douchebags. I recommend you shop around before purchasing because there are 6 books in the series and they are bundled a couple different ways as well as sold individually.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted November 25, 2013

    Refreshing! Funny!

    LOL funny. This guy has a great sense of humor. And for crying out loud people, we can learn to be a lot nicer to each other! Jewel said it best, "in the end, only kindness matters."

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted November 24, 2013

    Truly clever and unique.

    Truly clever and unique.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted November 22, 2013

    Definately different. Reginald rocks.

    Definately different. Reginald rocks.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted August 24, 2013

    Thought this book was excellent especially for free! Now i'm hoo

    Thought this book was excellent especially for free! Now i'm hooked on the fat vampire and cant wait to read the rest of the series!

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Posted July 12, 2013

    This was the tonic for all the glittery shimmering vampire stori

    This was the tonic for all the glittery shimmering vampire stories on the market today. Fat Vampire was funny to read. Too slow and out of shape to catch his food, this vampire has to find his other strengths to stay alive. Such a good read.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted May 24, 2013

    This was a silly little read

    Another free friday selection that didn't disappoint me. Was silly but hey it is free and I LOVE reading different type books so it was def different!

    0 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted December 22, 2013

    No text was provided for this review.

  • Anonymous

    Posted May 15, 2013

    No text was provided for this review.

  • Anonymous

    Posted March 11, 2014

    No text was provided for this review.

  • Anonymous

    Posted May 17, 2013

    No text was provided for this review.

  • Anonymous

    Posted December 13, 2013

    No text was provided for this review.

  • Anonymous

    Posted May 17, 2013

    No text was provided for this review.

Sort by: Showing all of 20 Customer Reviews

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