Table of Contents
Acknowledgments ix
Introduction 1
Part One Understanding the Risks on the Road to Lasting Love 17
1. Five Keys for a Great Relationship: PREP in a Nutshell 19
2. Destructive Patterns: Signs of Danger Ahead 37
3. Changing Roles, Changing Rules: Men and Women in Conflict 64
Part Two Teaming Up to Handle Conflict 87
4. When What You Heard Isn’t What I Said: Understanding Filters in Communication 89
5. Talking Safely Without Fighting: The Speaker Listener Technique 106
6. Controlling the Home Fires: Handling Issues and Events Well 134
7. New Perspectives on Problems and Problem Solving 160
8. Keeping Conflict Under Control: Ground Rules for a Great Relationship 192
Part Three Enjoying Each Other 215
9. Safe Harbor: Preserving and Protecting Friendship 217
10. Being There: Supporting One Another in Life 232
11. Playing Together: How to Succeed in Fun Without Really Trying 255
12. Sense and Sensuality: Enhancing and Protecting Your Sex Life 270
13. Sacred Places: Core Beliefs and Spiritual Intimacy 294
Part Four Staying the Course 319
14. Why You Can’t Always Get What You Want: Unraveling the Mysteries of Expectations 321
15. Forgiveness: Restoring Hope 343
16. Sticking, Stuck, or Stopped: On the Path to Commitment 372
17. Moving Forward 403
Getting More Help 409
Resources and Training 413
References 417
About the Authors 427
Index 429