Fire Me: A Tale of Scheming, Dreaming and Looking for Love in All the Wrong Places [NOOK Book]

Overview

How to lose your job and find true love...


Fed up with impossible deadlines and meaningless busywork, Anne Wyatt goes to work one day determined to resign. But that's the day her boss announces someone's getting laid off (and with a generous severance package). Now Anne has one day to ruin her career and convince her boss that someone should be her.


Anne's hysterical tactics are unwittingly undermined by Ken, the handsome graphic designer ...

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Fire Me: A Tale of Scheming, Dreaming and Looking for Love in All the Wrong Places

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Overview

How to lose your job and find true love...


Fed up with impossible deadlines and meaningless busywork, Anne Wyatt goes to work one day determined to resign. But that's the day her boss announces someone's getting laid off (and with a generous severance package). Now Anne has one day to ruin her career and convince her boss that someone should be her.


Anne's hysterical tactics are unwittingly undermined by Ken, the handsome graphic designer in the next cubicle, who has his own ideas for liberation from the corporate grind. In the end, Anne and Ken have to decide together what is important in life, and what they can discard without a second glance...


PRAISE FOR LIBBY MALIN::


"The love story is charming and will be appreciated by any woman with bad taste in men who somehow inexplicably ends up with Mr. Right."

Washington Post


"A whimsical look at the vagaries of dating... an intriguing side plot adds punch and pathos to the story..."

Publishers Weekly


"Malin's clever debut toys with chick-lit stereotypes and offers quite a few surprises along the way."

Booklist


"I was hooked!"

Freshfiction.com


"Loves Me, Loves Me Not will leave the reader feeling refreshed and hopeful...a simply terrific book."

A "Top Pick" at Romance Reader at Heart

Libby Malin is the author of Loves Me, Loves Me Not, and four YA mysteries. She has worked in public relations for various trade organizations and small newspapers, has been an education reform advocate, contributed commentaries to Vermont Public Radio and was a member of the Vermont Commission on Women. She lives in Lancaster, Pennsylvania.

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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9781402227387
  • Publisher: Sourcebooks, Incorporated
  • Publication date: 5/1/2009
  • Sold by: Barnes & Noble
  • Format: eBook
  • Pages: 304
  • Sales rank: 471,024
  • File size: 753 KB

Meet the Author

Libby Malin is published in women's fiction, including Fire Me, and is an Edgar nominated Young Adult mystery writer. She's worked in public relations, as an education reform advocate, and was a member of the Vermont Commission on Women. She lives with her husband and three children in Lancaster, Pennsylvania.
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Read an Excerpt

Excerpt from Chapter 1


From Mitch Burnham's book Use It or Lose It:

Think of your employees as children. You might let them sit behind the wheel, but you'd never give them the keys to the Maserati. Sure, let them pretend if it makes them feel good. But in the end, there's only one driver and it's not one of the kids.


Monday, 7:02 a.m.

Sometimes Anne Wyatt wished she could feed parts of her life into a shredder.


She stood staring out at the crystal blue sky from her seventh floor, Crystal City, Virginia, apartment, fingers warming around a Burnham Group mug, thoughts jammed in first gear as they outstripped her ability to process them all. Her short, reddish hair was

still damp from the shower and she wore one navy pump but couldn't find the other.


Should I call my brother to apologize for getting angry with him last night? Should I give up on Lean Cuisine and start eating regular frozen meals? Should I have handed in my resignation earlier when I first got word I'd landed the California job? Should I start drinking decaf or will I get a headache? Am I spending too much time with Rob when I know the relationship's not going anywhere? Should I forget about finding the other shoe and just change my outfit entirely?


Her thoughts danced and fluttered like the blossoms outside her window, eventually landing gently on the argument with her brother. Her brother was in the military and headed out for deployment overseas.


Her cat meowed gently from the short hall to the bedroom.

"Maisie, don't you think I should be able to suppress minor irritations at a time like this?" she asked without turning to look at her. She took the cat's silence as a yes.


But no, no, she had to jump in with verbal fists flying and rhetorical arrows zinging. She came from a family of fighters, after all. Her father had been a full-bird colonel and his father a general. Her mother had been an Army nurse.


Anne had not followed their path but had spent most of her young adulthood carving out a road that led in the opposite direction, away from rigidity and structure toward freedom and flexibility. She'd pursued a degree in the arts.


But she was Corporate Girl now, having forsaken flowing skirts, velvety jackets, and dangly earrings. Sometimes she wondered if her previous life had been a dream, or if she'd really wanted that life, or merely wanted to rebel or... or what?


It didn't matter anyway. She might be a responsible contributor to society now, but in her brother's eyes she would always be... Irresponsible Anne. She wished she were.


I should call Jack and smooth things over, but that's tantamount to surrender. Surely he'll lose what little respect he has for me if he senses I'm waving the white flag.


Noticing a smudge on the flat pane of glass, she quickly retrieved a bottle of window cleaner and square of paper towel. Here, at least, was a problem she could quickly solve. She'd become fastidious about her apartment lately, since she was going to need to sublet it. As she rubbed the glass, she admired the lush green landscape of spring, the earth so thick with new growth it looked like you could scoop it up with a spoon. She stepped back to admire her work just as a flash of deep blue broke away from the paler blue sky.


Bluebird of happiness-an omen! She smiled. What message do you have for me?


Bump! Splat! Bluebird of happiness ran into transparently clean window.

Ohmygod. She dropped the window cleaner as if it were a smoking gun.


Get out of here, Anne, before you slay any more harbingers of spring. She hustled to her bedroom, searching for that other shoe and rehearsing her speech.


"I'm resigning, Mr. Burnham, because..."

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Customer Reviews

Average Rating 4
( 7 )
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Sort by: Showing all of 7 Customer Reviews
  • Anonymous

    Posted March 11, 2013

    Showed promise

    The story started out strong and showed promise. But towards the end it slowed and dragged on.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Posted May 16, 2012

    Fire in the Hole!

    No,I did enjoy this book but it reminded me too much of the things I could possibly do to lose my job as well in the meantime. If only one could get away with the things she did in this novel on the job. I like to keep work at work and not when I read but it was well written.

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  • Posted May 4, 2009

    more from this reviewer

    A great summer chick lit read

    Put Fire Me by Libby Malin on your summer reading list. Newly released from Sourcebooks, this is perfect beach bag chick lit!

    The Burnham Group provides consulting, lectures and it's latest venture - ' camps' for management teams to work on trust issues among it's services.

    Anne Wyatt works at the Burnham Group and was in a relationship with CEO Mitch Burnham. She heads to the office on Pizazz Day (another team building exercise) to hand in her resignation and move on with her life.

    But before she can do that, Mitch announces that they need to tighten their belt a bit and he needs to let a staff member go. However, he will be fair and that person will get a generous severance package. Well, Anne could use that severance money. The problem is that a few other people in the office could as well. Sheila and Ken were planning on leaving as well. The money would be an added bonus. Ken was last hired, so he feels pretty confident it will be him let go. But Anne and Sheila are taking no chances......

    The entire book takes place over the course of that day in the office. Anne and Sheila do their best to become the worst employee ever, with absolutely hilarious results. It begins with simple things, jamming the copier, bad coffee, loud music and progresses to TV parties, gifts for everyone and completely inappropriate behaviour in an office. Sheila is a formidable competitor though as their efforts to outdo each other escalates. I had to check if Malin had ever worked in an office (she has) as her descriptions of office antics and politics had me laughing out loud. Each chapter begins with excerpts of wisdom from Mitch that are oh so clever! I saw past managers flash before my eyes. (If you like the television show The Office, you will appreciate the office antics in Fire Me)

    With nothing left to lose, Anne begins to see her life with newly opened eyes. Is she really happy? And what about that Ken - he is sweet and nice looking, maybe.... And Sheila, why didn't she ever talk to her before this? The closer the end of the day and the decision comes, the freer Anne feels.

    Who gets fired? I'm not telling!

    Malin has written a light-hearted romp of a book. The race to be fired is the part I enjoyed the most. The romantic and self discovery elements are there, but play a smaller part. I found this to be a quick, fun read. Libby's website mentions that Fire Me has been optioned for a film. I think it would make a great comedy.

    0 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted April 27, 2009

    more from this reviewer

    A Fun Read

    Fire me was a fun read! It had lots of humorous, unbelievable events smashed between serious life reflection and small sparks of romance. I giggled out loud at some of the antics that both Anne and co-worker, Shelia, pulled off. Under any circumstances outside of the fictional world, what these ladies did to get themselves fired would have ruined a company, smeared their names for a long time AND sent them out on their butts early that morning with out the added benefit of the offered severance package. Still yet, it was a cube-dweller's dream come true. Imagine doing anything and everything you ever wanted in the office. Imagine saying exactly what you meant, wrote an e-mail expressing how you really felt- without all the business-ese added in. Perhaps they should publish this book with a disclaimer; Warning: Do not try this at work.


    But what was the book really about? I believe Fire Me was more about self discovery than it was about getting an awesome deal while getting laid off. There was the underlying issue of what really makes you happy; financial stability or doing what you love. It's a book about new beginnings, whether the events that lead to that new beginning were fortunate or unfortunate - it's never too late to start over. I would love to go into more detail about what I mean, but seeing as how this book is still unpublished - I'd hate to be the one who spoils it for you. I will say this - I honestly believe that this book would make a great movie. While it was funny to read, I bet it would be even funnier to watch it unfold on the big screen.

    More reviews at www.iloves2read.blogspot.com

    0 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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    Posted May 2, 2011

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  • Anonymous

    Posted August 3, 2010

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  • Anonymous

    Posted December 15, 2011

    No text was provided for this review.

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