From Fancy Pants to Getting There

Overview

Who got caught up in a factory's parcel sealing machine and became bound up like an Egyptian mummy? Who trashed her unfaithful partner's shiny car? Who had to cope with cockroaches in the carpet and holes in the ceiling when working in a sandwich bar? Who tried to keep a pet shop clean with a balding broom, grubby duster and disintegrating dustpan and brush?
Elizabeth Wright's comfortable world shattered and spiralled downwards when she discovered that her partner of twelve ...
See more details below
Other sellers (Paperback)
  • All (3) from $7.08   
  • New (3) from $7.08   
From Fancy Pants to Getting There

Available on NOOK devices and apps  
  • NOOK Devices
  • Samsung Galaxy Tab 4 NOOK 7.0
  • Samsung Galaxy Tab 4 NOOK 10.1
  • NOOK HD Tablet
  • NOOK HD+ Tablet
  • NOOK eReaders
  • NOOK Color
  • NOOK Tablet
  • Tablet/Phone
  • NOOK for Windows 8 Tablet
  • NOOK for iOS
  • NOOK for Android
  • NOOK Kids for iPad
  • PC/Mac
  • NOOK for Windows 8
  • NOOK for PC
  • NOOK for Mac
  • NOOK for Web

Want a NOOK? Explore Now

NOOK Book (eBook)
$4.49
BN.com price
(Save 10%)$4.99 List Price

Overview

Who got caught up in a factory's parcel sealing machine and became bound up like an Egyptian mummy? Who trashed her unfaithful partner's shiny car? Who had to cope with cockroaches in the carpet and holes in the ceiling when working in a sandwich bar? Who tried to keep a pet shop clean with a balding broom, grubby duster and disintegrating dustpan and brush?
Elizabeth Wright's comfortable world shattered and spiralled downwards when she discovered that her partner of twelve years was being unfaithful on an industrial scale and her once thriving business toppled into a financial black hole. Bankruptcy was the only option.
Left with nothing, apart from a house deep into negative equity, and a rust riddled nightmare of a car, she and her little girl were forced to accept an impoverished lifestyle, where money for food would only stretch to tinned spaghetti, potatoes and cheap baked beans that 'looked and tasted like rabbit droppings.'
She amusingly recounts how she tried to find a job, but age and lack of modern skills made this difficult. Employment in a pet and garden shop taught her the true meaning of skinflint as the penny-pinching owner could well have been Scrooge reincarnated. Invited to his surprise 40th birthday party, she found the celebrations included a visit from a sexy, curvy, Kissogram girl, who suggestively shed her miniscule western outfit and most of her underwear. A touch of bondage and a strategically placed red rose added to the entertainment.
Working in a sandwich bar she had to cope with suicidal flies falling into the mayonnaise dishes, and large cockroaches emerging from under the carpets. A couple of local drunks had a fight, using newly baked loaves as weapons of war.
Growing her own food seemed a good idea, but competition came in the shape of thieving blackbirds that ate all the strawberries and an army of slugs and snails devoured anything else.
There was an invite to a wedding, where one of the tiny bridesmaids got her head stuck in the hotel railings. A visit to a donkey sanctuary for bags of fresh manure came to an abrupt and smelly halt on the busy A22 when a suicidal male pheasant strutted out in front of the car.
Sexy sessions with a handsome young man, 20 years her junior, brought such physical delights, that, 'I never thought that I'd be able to walk with my knees together again.'
Dog sitting looked a good prospect until Elizabeth visited her first clients and had to put distance between herself and the scabby, flea riddled Beagles, whose eccentric, dishevelled male owner seemed to have problems with a downward sliding trouser zip.
A visit to a car auction, looking for another vehicle, taught her that it is more important to bid for a vehicle with a good engine than choose one 'because I liked the colour.'
Invited out by pensioner Charlie, dressed to impress was wasted as his vehicle turned out to be a dirty old van that broke down, dinner was chips in a bag, entertainment was greyhound racing at the dog track and 'the surprise' was having to fight off his fumbles down a country lane. Then the van got stuck in the mud...
The job front looked up, the income improved, life seemed great until the Bankruptcy Trustees decided that Elizabeth's house, which was well into positive equity, should be sold and all the creditors paid up.
How did Elizabeth cope with the prospect of having no home and still keep her sense of humour...?
Read More Show Less

Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9781909359161
  • Publisher: My Voice Publishing Ltd
  • Publication date: 4/27/2013
  • Pages: 204
  • Product dimensions: 5.50 (w) x 8.50 (h) x 0.43 (d)

Customer Reviews

Be the first to write a review
( 0 )
Rating Distribution

5 Star

(0)

4 Star

(0)

3 Star

(0)

2 Star

(0)

1 Star

(0)

Your Rating:

Your Name: Create a Pen Name or

Barnes & Noble.com Review Rules

Our reader reviews allow you to share your comments on titles you liked, or didn't, with others. By submitting an online review, you are representing to Barnes & Noble.com that all information contained in your review is original and accurate in all respects, and that the submission of such content by you and the posting of such content by Barnes & Noble.com does not and will not violate the rights of any third party. Please follow the rules below to help ensure that your review can be posted.

Reviews by Our Customers Under the Age of 13

We highly value and respect everyone's opinion concerning the titles we offer. However, we cannot allow persons under the age of 13 to have accounts at BN.com or to post customer reviews. Please see our Terms of Use for more details.

What to exclude from your review:

Please do not write about reviews, commentary, or information posted on the product page. If you see any errors in the information on the product page, please send us an email.

Reviews should not contain any of the following:

  • - HTML tags, profanity, obscenities, vulgarities, or comments that defame anyone
  • - Time-sensitive information such as tour dates, signings, lectures, etc.
  • - Single-word reviews. Other people will read your review to discover why you liked or didn't like the title. Be descriptive.
  • - Comments focusing on the author or that may ruin the ending for others
  • - Phone numbers, addresses, URLs
  • - Pricing and availability information or alternative ordering information
  • - Advertisements or commercial solicitation

Reminder:

  • - By submitting a review, you grant to Barnes & Noble.com and its sublicensees the royalty-free, perpetual, irrevocable right and license to use the review in accordance with the Barnes & Noble.com Terms of Use.
  • - Barnes & Noble.com reserves the right not to post any review -- particularly those that do not follow the terms and conditions of these Rules. Barnes & Noble.com also reserves the right to remove any review at any time without notice.
  • - See Terms of Use for other conditions and disclaimers.
Search for Products You'd Like to Recommend

Recommend other products that relate to your review. Just search for them below and share!

Create a Pen Name

Your Pen Name is your unique identity on BN.com. It will appear on the reviews you write and other website activities. Your Pen Name cannot be edited, changed or deleted once submitted.

 
Your Pen Name can be any combination of alphanumeric characters (plus - and _), and must be at least two characters long.

Continue Anonymously

    If you find inappropriate content, please report it to Barnes & Noble
    Why is this product inappropriate?
    Comments (optional)