Table of Contents
Prologue 1
Advice from the Patron Saint of Anxiety
Part I Why We Need Anxiety
What anxiety is, what it's for, and how it relies upon our powerful human ability to imagine the future
1 What Anxiety Is (and Isn't) 5
Anxiety is a complex emotion, related to fear but distinctly different It varies along a spectrum of intensity from everyday worries to crippling panic, but no matter where we fall on that scale, the role of anxiety in our lives may not be what we think it is.
2 Why Anxiety Exists 25
This emotion has evolved to make us more resourceful in the face of uncertainty. The biology of anxiety reveals why we need this difficult feeling-and why it has to be unpleasant to do its Job. Anxiety transcends our basic fight/flight responses because it is rooted in our primal strivings for social connection and future rewards.
3 Future Tense: Choose Your Own Adventure 47
Anxiety emerges because we are creatures who think about and prepare for the future. But our misunderstanding of anxiety keeps us from seeing this, and so we experience it only as something negative and disabling.
Part II How We were Misled about Anxiety
Why and when our understanding of anxiety went wrong and how science and modern life exacerbate this misunderstanding
4 The Anxiety-as-Disease Story 71
The psychological and medical sciences turned anxiety into an ailment. But even before that, medieval views of emotion and the life of the soul demonized anxiety. We learned to think of it as something to avoid and suppress, which only causes it to spiral out of control.
5 Comfortably Numb 91
By thinking of anxiety as an unwanted affliction, we do everything in our power to do away with it. The widespread overprescription of anti-anxiety medications and painkillers is a prime example-one that has had damaging, even fatal, results.
6 Blame the Machines? 105
Digital technology is a driver of unhealthy anxiety because it facilitates escapism and disrupts nourishing social connections. Blaming technology for all problematic anxiety, however, is a mistake-it misses the complexity of the problem while keeping us from seeing how to use digital technology in better ways.
Part III How to Rescue Anxiety
Seeing anxiety as an ally will improve every part of our lives and can promote exceptional resourcefulness, creativity, and Joy. In rescuing anxiety, we rescue ourselves.
7 Uncertainty 127
Uncertainty puts us on edge. By leaning into that discomfort to figure out what to do about uncertainty-even in the middle of a global pandemic-we open doors to possibilities we never imagined before. When we do so, anxiety is the secret sauce.
8 Creativity 143
When we accept the discomfort of anxiety and listen to what it's teaching us, we become more creative-whether we're creating works of art or figuring out what to make for dinner.
9 Kids Are Not Fragile 159
Too often, we react to our children's anxiety with accommodation and overprotection. We do so with the best of intentions and because we believe they are fragile, but we are wrong. We can help kids be their strongest and most resilient when we stop fearing their anxiety-and our own.
10 Being Anxious in the Right Way 187
If you've read this far, you've changed your mindset about anxiety. It's time to do something about it.
Acknowledgments 209
Notes 217
Index 229