Get Out of Your Own Way: Overcoming Self-Defeating Behavior [NOOK Book]

Overview

Practical, proven steps show how to transform 40 common self-defeating behaviors, including procratination, envy, obsession, anger, self-pity, compulsion, neediness, guilt, rebellion, inaction, and more.

Self-defeating behavior is the single most common reason that people seek psychotherapy. This psychiatrist's practical action plan for transforming behavior from self-defeating to life-enhancing provides proven steps that show how...

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Get Out of Your Own Way: Overcoming Self-Defeating Behavior

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Overview

Practical, proven steps show how to transform 40 common self-defeating behaviors, including procratination, envy, obsession, anger, self-pity, compulsion, neediness, guilt, rebellion, inaction, and more.

Self-defeating behavior is the single most common reason that people seek psychotherapy. This psychiatrist's practical action plan for transforming behavior from self-defeating to life-enhancing provides proven steps that show how to change 40 behaviors, including procrastination, guilt, and anger.

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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9781101657751
  • Publisher: Penguin Group (USA)
  • Publication date: 2/1/1996
  • Series: Perigee
  • Sold by: Penguin Group
  • Format: eBook
  • Pages: 208
  • Sales rank: 97,538
  • File size: 628 KB

Meet the Author

Mark Goulston, M.D., is a corporate consultant who works with executives, managers, and line workers to help them get out of their own way so they can realize the success that their skills, talents, and abilities deserve. His clients include Goldman Sachs, Merrill Lynch, GE, White & Case, Eli Lilly and Company, Disney, Kodak, and the FBI. He writes "The Leading Edge" column for Fast Company. He was selected as one of America's Top Psychiatrists for 2004-2005 by the Consumers' Research Council of America. Dr. Goulston is the author of Get Out of Your Own Way and Six Secrets of a Lasting Relationship.

Philip Goldberg, a novelist and screenwriter, has authored or coauthored sixteen books.

Mark Goulston, M.D., is a corporate consultant who works with executives, managers, and line workers to help them get out of their own way so they can realize the success that their skills, talents, and abilities deserve. His clients include Goldman Sachs, Merrill Lynch, GE, White & Case, Eli Lilly and Company, Disney, Kodak, and the FBI. He writes "The Leading Edge" column for Fast Company. He was selected as one of America's Top Psychiatrists for 2004-2005 by the Consumers' Research Council of America. Dr. Goulston is the author of Get Out of Your Own Way and Six Secrets of a Lasting Relationship.

Philip Goldberg, a novelist and screenwriter, has authored or coauthored sixteen books.

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Table of Contents

Introduction: How to Beat Self-Defeat
1 Chasing After Love and Approval From a Parent 1
2 Getting Involved With the Wrong People 6
3 Procrastinating 11
4 Expecting Others to Understand How You Feel 15
5 Waiting Until It's Too Late 21
6 Getting So Angry You Make Things Worse 25
7 Saying Yes When You Want to Say No 29
8 Holding a Grudge 33
9 Assuming They Don't Want Anything in Return 37
10 Playing It Safe 41
11 Always Having to Be Right 45
12 Focusing on What Your Partner Is Doing Wrong 49
13 Putting up With Broken Promises 54
14 Trying to Make up While You're Still Angry 59
15 Not Learning From Your Mistakes 63
16 Trying to Change Others 67
17 Rebelling Just for the Sake of Rebelling 71
18 Talking When Nobody's Listening 75
19 Pretending You're Fine When You're Not 79
20 Becoming Obsessive or Compulsive 83
21 Taking Things Too Personally 88
22 Acting Too Needy 92
23 Having Unrealistic Expectations 96
24 Trying to Take Care of Everybody 100
25 Refusing to "Play Games" 104
26 Putting on an Act to Make a Good Impression 108
27 Being Envious of Others 113
28 Feeling Sorry for Yourself 117
29 Assuming the Hard Way Is the Right Way 122
30 Thinking "I'm Sorry" Is Enough 126
31 Holding It All In 130
32 Quitting Too Soon 135
33 Letting Others Control Your Life 139
34 Leaving Too Much to Chance 143
35 Letting Fear Run Your Life 148
36 Not Moving on After a Loss 152
37 Not Getting Out When the Getting Is Good 156
38 Not Asking for What You Need 161
39 Giving Advice When They Want Something Else 166
40 Backing Down Because You Don't Feel Ready 171
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Sort by: Showing all of 4 Customer Reviews
  • Anonymous

    Posted November 7, 2002

    Change your life in 90 minutes

    This book is a paradox. Usually I can't read more than 30-40 pages of a self-help book without putting it down and often not picking it up for a few days or weeks and then having to start all over again from the beginning. I read this entire book in 90 minutes and I am not a fast reader. What I like most about it is that each 3-4 page chapter describing and correcting a common self-defeating behavior is longer than a handful of quotes, but shorter enough to keep my full attention. It was a little like eating pistachio nuts which I often keep eating until my fingers are raw. In this case I kept reading GET OUT OF YOUR OWN WAY until I was done and my life was changed.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted June 28, 2002

    A Great Book to Give to Everyone You Care About

    That this book is easy and fun to read does not mean it is light weight. Filled with insight, pith, and poignancy it is one the most enjoyable and usable self-help books I have ever read. I have given a copy to everyone I care about and all of them were appreciative.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted February 3, 2002

    Twenty Years of Therapy in One Small Book!

    If you are like me, you¿ve always wondered what therapists tell their patients in all of those sessions that last for years, and ultimately cost more than a college education. Dr. Goulston has wrapped his advice for 40 negative attitudes and behaviors into brief chapters. I certainly found myself in some of the chapters, and the advice was often helpful. Basically, Dr. Goulston is hoping that you will develop an open mind to what is available at the moment, and make a good decision that will serve your best interests and those of people you care about. Being free of old habits, outmoded thoughts, and bad entanglements, however, doesn¿t mean you have to be on your own. His advice is often to get a partner or someone to help you get moving. If you have just a little bit of one of these problems, this book will probably work well. If you have a lot or an unusual type of one of these problems, you are probably going to need heavier duty help. For example, Dr. Goulston sees procrastination as being based in loneliness. Get some company, and you will move forward is the concept. If your procrastination is not tied to loneliness, then you will not find this advice totally helpful. But how much can you do in just a few, brief pages? Most of the advice was spot on, from my perspective. Take away your blinders, your false starts, and your false inhibitions . . . and just openly be yourself. Stop stalling! Donald Mitchell, co-author of The 2,000 Percent Solution and The Irresistible Growth Enterprise

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  • Anonymous

    Posted January 13, 2011

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