Getting More: How to Negotiate to Achieve Your Goals in the Real World

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This new model of human interaction has been chosen by Google to train the entire company worldwide (30,000 employees), is the #1 book for your career chosen by The Wall Street Journal’s website, and is labeled “phenomenal” by Lawyers’ Weekly and “brilliant” by Liza Oz of the Oprah network.
Based on more than 20 years of research and practice among 30,000 people in 45 countries, Getting More concludes that finding and valuing the other party’s emotions and perceptions creates far more value than the conventional wisdom of power and logic. It is intended to provide better agreements for everyone no matter what they negotiate – from jobs to kids to billion dollar deals to shopping.
The book, a New York Times bestseller and #1 Wall Street Journal business best seller, is based on Professor Stuart Diamond’s award-winning course at the Wharton Business School, where the course has been the most popular over 13 years. It challenges the conventional wisdom on every page, from “win-win” to BATNA to rationality to the use of power. Companies have made billions of dollars so far using his new model and parents have gotten their 4-year-olds to willingly brush their teeth and go to bed.
Prof. Diamond draws from his experience as a Pulitzer Prize winning journalist at The New York Times, Harvard-trained attorney, Wharton MBA, U.N. Consultant in many countries and manager and executive in many sectors, including technology, agriculture, medical services, finance, energy and aviation. “The ROI from reading Getting More will make it the best investment you make this year,” says Rhys Dekle, the business development head of the Microsoft Games division, which produces X-Box. He added that the book was his team’s best investment of the year too. The model was also used to quickly solve the 2008 Hollywood Writer’s Strike.
The advice is addressed through the insightful stories of more than 400 people who have used Prof. Diamond’s tools with great success: A 20% savings on an item already on sale. An extra $300 million profit in a business. A woman from India getting out of her own arranged marriage. Better relationships with the family, including teenagers. Raises at work. Better jobs. Dealing with emotional situations. Meeting one’s goals. Finding better things to trade. Solving cultural and political problems, sports conflicts, and ordinary arguments.
The book is intended to be used in any situation. The most common response is “life changing”, beginning on page one. “The most inspirational book I have read this year” said David Simon, an attorney in San Francisco, CA. “This book can change the world,” says Craig Silverman, Investment Advisor, Long Island, NY
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Editorial Reviews

From the Publisher
Acclaim For The New York Times Best-Seller, Getting More, And Author
Stuart Diamond
“#1 Business Book to read for your career in 2011.”  Wall Street Journal FINS blog
“Phenomenal.” Lawyers Weekly
“Brilliant.” Lisa Oz, Oprah Network
“This book will give the reader a massive advantage in any negotiation.”  Stephanie Camp, Senior Digital Strategist, Microsoft.
“Superb…counterintuitive…immensely useful.” Kirkus starred review (new books)

"The Getting More Model is the negotiation model of choice for our CEO clients & staff of Financial Advisors.”
Morgan Stanley Smith Barney
The book is amazing . . . extremely powerful in the real world. A must read!” Adam Guren, Chief Investment Officer, First New York Securities
“I am living proof that this course does pay! I saved $245 million for my company.” Richard T.   Morena, CFO, Asbury Park Press, NJ
 “The most valuable tools in my 15 years in sales, marketing, and business development.” Sandeep Sawhney, Director of Business Development, The Weather Channel

“The best training we have ever received on this or any subject. The benefits are immediate and tangible.”  John Sobel, Senior Vice President/General Counsel, Yahoo

“I am one of Stuart Diamond’s biggest fans; he taught me more than anyone I can recall.” Rob McIntosh, Procurement Director, Dell
“The crown jewel; it fundamentally changed my way of thinking.” Ravi Radhakrishnan, Senior Manager, Accenture
“The best book I’ve read after the Bible.” Jeff Schultz, Health Benefits Advocate, MN
“This book can change the world.” Craig Silverman, Investment Advisor, NY
“After just a few chapters, I became a better parent.” Vivek Nadkarni, Technology Exec, CA
“Life changing.” Kerri Kuhn, Morrison & Foester Law Firm, CA
“Wow, it really works! This stuff is truly valuable.” Matthew Doyle, Director, The Strauss Group HR & Executive Recruitment Co., Buffalo, NY.
“Cannot put it down!” Michael Magee, Director, Development Finance Bank, UK
“The first book I’ve bought that has actually made me money.” Owen Devitt, Marketing Executive, Enterprise Ireland, Irish Government
"I am still amazed how much I learned." Sylvia Reul, Managing Partner, Reul Law Firm, Germany
“Definitely, this book is a MUST for everybody.” Katrina Agustin, Network Marketing Firm, Philippines
Stuart Diamond is the master of negotiation. Robin Khuda, Executive Director, NEXTDC (data centers) Ltd., Australia & New Zealand.
“I rely on Stuart Diamond’s negotiation tools every day.”  Christian Hernandez, Head of International Business Development, Facebook.
“Practical, immediately applicable and highly effective.” Evan Wittenberg, Chief Talent Officer, Hewlett-Packard
“A flexible toolkit for getting your way, whether…a million-dollar deal, a botched restaurant dish, or a petulant 4-year-old.”  Psychology Today
“Stuart Diamond equipped me with the tools to be more effective in all of life’s pursuits.” Larry B. Loftus, Head of Procter & Gamble Far East
“For women, empowering and enabling.”  Umber Ahmad, Exec Director, Platinum Gate Capital Management; former vice president, Goldman Sachs
“Invaluable in helping me achieve my goals, whether on the field, in the office, or at home with my five children.” Anthony Noto, CFO, National Football League
“There isn’t an hour that goes by in my personal and professional lives when I don’t use what I learned from you…”  Bill Ruhl, Director, National Customer Service Operations, Verizon

“Wonderful!” Laura Chavez, Host, ABC’s “Let’s Talk Live.”

Kirkus Reviews

A former Pulitzer Prize–winning reporter for the New York Times, Diamond (Law/Univ. of Pennsylvania) debuts with a superb how-to based on his immensely popular course on negotiation.

The author prepares for any negotiation by asking himself, "What are my goals? Who are 'they'? What will it take to persuade them?" Depending on the answers, he then draws selectively on bargaining tools and strategies described in this anecdote-rich book. Others in his field assume that most people in a negotiation are rational. Not so, says Diamond. People in the real world—whether friends, store clerks or CEOs—tend to be emotional and irrational in their interactions. Since the people involved make up 90 percent of a negotiation (substance accounts for only 10 percent), you must negotiate based on your understanding of "the pictures in the head of the other party"—a phrase Diamond frequently uses to underscore that psychology trumps the issues at the bargaining table. Successful negotiators must prepare, learn what makes others tick (through research and small talk), take small steps, communicate clearly, turn problems into opportunities, avoid deceit and embrace differences. Above all, writes the author, they must stay focused on specific goals and connect with the other party. Many of Diamond's suggestions are counterintuitive: Help the other person do better (you might even give them a copy of the negotiation model in this book, he says); learn their personal likes and dislikes; offer them something you know they want, such as hard-to-get event tickets. While good vibes and communication can help clinch a deal, writes the author, getting emotional can kill one: "People who are emotional stop listening. They often become unpredictable and rarely are able to focus on their goals." Diamond provides hundreds of fascinating examples of what people in his classes have achieved using his approach—from talking a reluctant retailer into giving a discount to closing multimillion-dollar deals. He devotes separate chapters to negotiating at work, in the marketplace, in relationships and while traveling.

This immensely useful book will have wide appeal and leave many readers anxious to put their new skills to work.

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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9780307716897
  • Publisher: Crown Religion/Business/Forum
  • Publication date: 12/28/2010
  • Pages: 416
  • Sales rank: 304,774
  • Product dimensions: 6.88 (w) x 11.18 (h) x 1.40 (d)

Meet the Author

STUART DIAMOND is one of the world’s leading experts on negotiation. He has advised executives and managers from more than 200 of the Fortune 500 companies, and taught 30,000 people in 45 countries, from country leaders and professionals to homemakers and school children. A professor from practice at The Wharton School of business, where his course has been the most popular over 13 years, he has also taught at Harvard, Columbia, NYU, USC, Oxford and Berkeley, and advised the U.N. and the World Bank.  A former associate director of the Harvard Negotiation Project at Harvard Law School, he has managed a variety of business ventures, including technology, medical services, energy, agriculture, finance and aviation.
He holds a J.D. from Harvard Law School and an MBA from Wharton. Previously, Diamond was a Pulitzer Prize–winning reporter for the New York Times. His negotiation process solved the 2008 Hollywood Writers Strike, and has been selected by Google to train its 30,000 employees worldwide. Other clients include JP Morgan, Morgan Stanley, Microsoft and multiple companies in the healthcare field. He advised the top government leaders in Latvia in organizing their government after the fall of the Soviet Union, assisted Kuwait in rebuilding its government after the first Gulf War and advised the President and Foreign Minister of Nicaragua on more effective media and political strategies.
He also helps parents to get their young children to willingly brush their teeth and go to bed and shows employees and executives how to get better jobs and raises.
For more information, visit
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Customer Reviews

Average Rating 4.5
( 47 )
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See All Sort by: Showing 1 – 20 of 47 Customer Reviews
  • Posted December 29, 2010

    more from this reviewer

    The principles & techniques of negotiation taught by one of the best negotiation professors you'll meet

    I was lucky enough to have Professor Diamond as a Negotiations professor at University of Pennsylvania Law School. He was a tough teacher because he made us practice his techniques inside and outside of class. But his class has been one of the most valuable ones I've taken in my life.

    I rely on the 4 Quadrant exercise to prep for any critical negotiation - and even my mom and brothers have learned to appreciate its effectiveness.

    We recently used it to help my husband negotiate his benefits & salary at his new job.

    3 out of 3 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted April 6, 2013

    Great Book!

    This book definitely taught me things that will stick with me.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted December 10, 2012

    Outstanding book

    Stuart Diamond was one of the best professors I have ever had and I jumped at the chance to buy his book. I can tell you first hand his ideas changed the way I have discussions, deal with conflict and of course handle negotiations. It also feels right to try to maximize value for yourself AND your negotiating partner. I can't recommend this book highly enough.

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  • Posted January 5, 2011

    A fresh perspective!

    This was a really good book. It was definitely worth the read. The process that Stuart lays out could be beneficial in negotiations. I did find it just a bit complicated though and wonder if it is possible to learn all the strategies and techniques as thoroughly as he demonstrates. Although there are only 12 strategies to follow, there are also many key points that have to be taken into account in every situation, and sometimes very quickly. I agree with Stuart when he says it will take quite a bit of review and practice to be able to use it at anytime, but I am already finding the effort well worth it!

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  • Anonymous

    Posted January 5, 2011

    A new way of seeing things

    I found this book to be insightful and a very interesting read. The process the Stuart recommends is easily understood and full of shrewd common sense. For example, he reminds the reader to seek out the person who can make the decision in a negotiation. This may sound like common sense, but is actually a common mistake. Stuart shows through his examples how to know when you are dealing with the person who can actually make your goal a reality. An excellent resource!

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  • Posted January 5, 2011

    This can work for anyone!

    I really enjoyed reading Getting More. It was a fascinating look at negotiating and how much is actually involved in the process. There is even a website provided to download the wallet size summary to keep with you for review and practice. There are so many interactions in life where this information will be useful!

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  • Posted January 5, 2011

    May not be what it appears.

    Getting More may sound like a book on aggressive negotiating tactics, however it is anything but. Stuart repeatedly reminds us to avoid aggression and instead concentrate on collaboration to successfully negotiate. This does not mean compromising or avoiding. Instead, he reminds the reader to be creative in finding joint gains and even trade items of unequal value. Mastering these skills will no doubt yield better rewards than using aggression, as he so clearly shows.

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  • Posted January 5, 2011

    Just what I was looking for

    At first, I thought Getting More would be a dry business book about corporate negotiating. I was certainly wrong. This book is the perfect tool for anyone wanting to learn better negotiating strategies in ANY area of their life! I have already begun to use them!

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  • Anonymous

    Posted January 5, 2011

    Would Recommend

    This book is very well written. Stuart Diamond does a great job of making the process understandable and achievable. It is a lot of information to take in, and there are a lot of examples provided to read through. However, there is sound logic in the ideas presented, if one is willing to take the time to put them into practice.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted January 5, 2011

    Take the time to read this!

    There is no certain type of person I would recommend this book to because it is applicable to anyone attempting to get what they need. Stuart shows us how many ways we negotiate already in everyday life. From someone negotiating a raise at work to a parent negotiating with kids at home, Getting More clearly shows how to get what you need from any situation.

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  • Posted January 5, 2011

    Good Ideas

    Getting More was a great read and full of useful tools to navigate any negotiation. It does not promise magic solutions or phrases. Instead, it offers a map to follow and sound tools to use in many different types of negotiation. Not all of the tools will fit every situation, but Stuart shows that by practicing them, you will be able to quickly determine which of them will help you achieve your goal.

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  • Posted January 5, 2011

    The real problem

    Getting More takes a close look at negotiating successfully. Surprisingly, Stuart Diamond reveals that most negotiations break down because no one is solving the real problem. His real-life approach to making a personal connection with people in order to find the actual problem is eye-opening! This combined with all of the other strategies he reveals combine to make a successful negotiation possible.

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  • Posted January 4, 2011

    This works!

    After reading getting more I decided to put Stuart Diamond's teachings to the test against the one person I find myself negotiating with every day, my 5 year old daughter. Since both of us are notably strong willed, there are many occasions that arise when I feel we are pitted against each other in pointless arguments. I have been following Stuart's advice and beginning each situation with questions to make sure I understand her point of view, one of Stuart's first steps. This also gives her a sense of emotional value, which is another of Stuart's key strategies. The result has been fantastic! Not only are we both less emotional, but seeing her cooperation gives me a sense of control over the situations I've never had before!

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  • Posted January 4, 2011

    Great tools!

    While reading getting more, I was impressed by the way Stuart Diamond's strategies could be useful to anyone, not just professional negotiators. In chapter 1, Stuart lists 12 key strategies, as the steps to getting more from any type of negotiation. In so many of Stuart's examples, the pivotal change in the negotiation comes when one stops thinking only of their own needs and concentrates on the needs of the other person instead. As a society driven to always think of our own needs first, this will definitely present a challenge. However, throughout the book Stuart reminds us vividly how much higher the cost can be to us both financially and emotionally when we refuse to do this. Many of Stuart's suggestions will set people back at first, such as the idea of role-playing as a practicing tool to learn the process. Regardless, Stuart does an excellent job of showing us that in order to reach our goal we must leave our comfort zone and begin to see situations from the other persons point of view in order to achieve our goal, and furthermore that the rewards from this can be surprisingly even more than what we originally hoped for.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted January 4, 2011

    Really in-depth

    Getting More is more than just a book about negotiating tactics. Yes, it offers many valuable points to fall back on and guide you as you negotiate, but it offers more than that. Getting More offers a clear look into the human relationship and it's impact on negotiation. It summarizes the fact that, until we begin to communicate effectively with one another and truly learn to value one another, we will never be effective at getting what we need. Stuart reminds us that even those who seem insignificant can actually be the ones who give us the key we need to get what we want and that not taking the time to see all those around us in a valuable way will eventually cost much more in the long run.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted January 4, 2011

    A change in the way we do things.

    In Getting More, Stuart Diamond throws common sense into the face of traditional negotiating tactics. Rather than the previously accepted practice of walking out as a show of strength, when we do not get what we need, Stuart shows us that staying calm and staying focused on the goal will actually produce greater returns. This re-examination of the old ways of doing things is prevalent throughout the book. All the strategies are laid out in a clear, easy to understand format and supported with accounts of those who have actually succeeded with them. Highly recommend!

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  • Posted January 4, 2011

    Made me take a closer look.

    I hadn't ever stop to think about how I negotiate before reading this book. Now I find myself considering the points in this book every time I need something from someone and even have been sharing what I learned with friends and family. Stuart Diamond's unique approach to our every day encounters is illuminating. This book has caused me to take a closer look at my perceptions and assumptions of people, which Stuart notes is a common pitfall in a successful negotiation. There were a lot of examples to read through which was both a helpful but a bit overwhelming. However, the teachings were sound and very applicable.

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  • Posted January 3, 2011

    Putting it to work

    If you are someone who has trouble negotiating with people, this is the perfect book for you! Even if you are someone who feels they are skilled at negotiation, I bet this book would offer more insight into ways you could improve. That's because Stuart Diamond pulls the negotiation apart to it's smallest part and shows how even the most insignificant word or phrase can make the difference between getting what you want or walking away with nothing. Through detailed explanation and example Getting More shows a clear path to a successful negotiation. The only trouble I see is that most won't be willing to work hard at learning the strategies or find the desire to consider more than what they want out of the situation.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted January 3, 2011

    No more arguing!

    In Getting More, Stuart Diamond shows us that many times we are arguing with someone when we should instead be negotiating with them. He reminds us that too many times we get caught up in being right and how this only distracts us from the goal of negotiating for what we want. So many times we come away from arguments and haven't succeeded in anything but causing conflict. This book holds the keys to changing that!

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  • Posted January 3, 2011

    A fresh look.

    As a sales rep, I find myself constantly in situations where I need to quickly assess the situation and put the customer at ease to be able to provide them a view of my products. Sometimes I am given no more than a few moments to make an impression and convince them that I am sincere, and that what I am offering could be of value to them. I had been feeling rather discouraged and ineffective in my efforts, until I read this book. What I hadn't realized, before reading Getting More, was that each of these encounters are actually negotiations that can be managed very effectively. I was encouraged to find that the tools needed to turn a negotiation in my favor could be as simple as using framing to present my information using the right words and phrases to persuade the other person. The author not only explains this process, but provides multiple examples of exactly how to do this. Although, he also reminds that we will each bring our own personal style to these negotiations, I feel certain that the easy to follow strategies will provide the basis for more effective sales in my future. Framing was only one of the 12 strategies presented in Getting more. I went to the website provided and downloaded the wallet Four Quadrant Negotiation Model. I plan to keep it close at hand for quick review to help me feel better prepared for these opportunities!

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