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Graverobbers Wanted (No Experience Necessary)
     

Graverobbers Wanted (No Experience Necessary)

4.2 15
by Jeff Strand
 

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When you're desperate for money, searching for a little adventure, and aren't the most responsible person in the world, you can end up doing some outrageous things. Which is how Andrew Mayhem, an extremely married father of two, ends up accepting $20,000 to find a key...a key buried with a body in a shallow grave.

But what he finds in the grave isn't quite what

Overview

When you're desperate for money, searching for a little adventure, and aren't the most responsible person in the world, you can end up doing some outrageous things. Which is how Andrew Mayhem, an extremely married father of two, ends up accepting $20,000 to find a key...a key buried with a body in a shallow grave.

But what he finds in the grave isn't quite what he expected, and what begins as a simple evening of morally questionable manual labor turns into a really good way to die. Andrew finds himself investigating a murder while forced into a bizarre game of wits and courage played by an unseen killer with a twisted sense of humor. It's a game that will involve him with a group of filmmakers known as Ghoulish Delights, who are hiding a secret that will test every last bit of Andrew's nerve to discover.

And it's impossible to find a babysitter.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
Author of several outrageous novels, Jeff Strand grew up in Alaska, where his parents will insist he had a normal childhood, no matter what you might think after reading this novel. His comedic material has appeared in several publications, including a whopping 1/365th of the anthology HORRORS! 365 SCARY STORIES. The story involved improper use of an electric carving knife, but it was meant to be funny. Really.

Editorial Reviews

Stumbling from one odd job to the next, Andrew Mayhem is certain that the right career opportunity will present itself eventually. It will be the one, in his opinion, that offers the greatest reward for the least effort. Perhaps that is why, when a beautiful woman offers him and his friend, Roger Tanglen, $20,000 to rob her husband's grave, he accepts with only the slightest hesitation.

Such is the absurd world of Mayhem, and the unconventional mind of the author. Graverobbers Wanted is both a comedic delight and a dark journey that the reader will gladly take, step by enthralling step.

Mayhem and Tanglen accept the bizarre proposition, but things start going wrong from the beginning. The first omen comes early on; the corpse they are supposed to exhume begins firing a gun from inside the coffin, an event for which they definitely had no contingency plan. Although they find the item they were asked to retrieve, it never makes it into the hands of the corpse's widow. Mayhem, Tanglen, and the widow are immediately abducted by a psychopathic serial killer with a sense of humor. He engages Mayhem in a twisted game, and Mayhem can't refuse; five lives hang in the balance. Thus, the gruesome, suspenseful, and riotous game begins. Mayhem deftly unravels the clues, and learns what is behind the tangled plot into which he's been led. It isn't easy, though, and Mayhem faces obstacles at every turn, not the least of which is finding a reliable baby-sitter. He handles each challenge in his own inimitable way, which is to say, with the utmost irreverence. The reader will barely finish chuckling at one sarcastic line before the next comic bit occurs.

Mayhem's sardonic commentary moves the story along at a quick pace, and mitigates the revulsion one might ordinarily feel when reading such graphic accounts of murder and mutilation. Strand uses humor to this end so effectively that it almost comes as a surprise to discover the victims really are dead at the story's end. Dead they are, however, and each one suffered an extraordinarily horrid death. More sensitive readers should be forewarned that, while an enjoyable book, Graverobbers offers more than its share of gore. Strand's voice and storytelling ability improve considerably with each new effort, and Graverobbers is his best adult effort to date. A sequel, Single White Psychopath Seeks Same, is to be released in March. (December)

Celtic Frog Reviews
GRAVEROBBERS WANTED is deliciously dark humor blended together with a nice thriller/mystery. This story introduces us to a "hero" named Andrew Mayhem, and the last name is prophetic. He is a guy trying desperately to find himself, and failing miserably. His adventures teach him what he is not - namely- any kind of superhero. Definitely a good read for any who like dark humor and solid writing. Very Highly recommended. Jeff Strand is one seriously warped character, and this is a good thing." Five good croaks
Rhapsody Magazine
A hilarious murder mystery that will keep the reader guessing, laughing, and cringing with each turn of the page. Not a run of the mill mystery, not when the reader has to grab a tissue to wipe tears of laughter out of their eyes. Unquestionably a man with a demented mind, Mr. Strand is one author the readers should look for again and again!
Crescent Blues
I read.
I chuckled.
I giggled, snorted, guffawed my way through Jeff Strand's incredibly funny, incredibly dark, incredibly mysterious debut novel. If GRAVEROBBERS WANTED (No Experience Necessary) reflects his wealth of talent, then Mr. Strand will soon have a fan club clamoring for his next release. I intend to be right there clamoring with the rest.

A well-written mystery, told in the first person, GRAVEROBBERS WANTED (No Experience Necessary) should be on every mystery lover's list of favorites, especially if the odd and unusual tickles the imagination.
4 Crescents

Huntress Book Review
This is one of the best books I have read in a loooong time! You have simply got to read this one! I laughed out loud so often that people kept coming to see what was going on! Yes, it is THAT good! Jeff Strand is an author to keep your eye on. With this one book, he has won me as a huge fan! BRAVO! Excellent!
Midnight Scribe Reviews
More twists and turns than a computer maze game. One keeps waiting for the plot to suffer its inevitable middle-chapter predictability, for the pace to succumb to the usual pre-conclusion slowdown, for the humor to lose its freshness--but they never do. A damn enjoyable read. It's a five-star book in any catalogue.
Word Museum
This was the most totally engrossing and grossing-out book I've read in a long time. I was immediately caught up in the zaniness of the story and its off-beat humor...Jeff Strand is a consummate storyteller, and I hope we see a lot more of his work soon.
RunningRiver Reader
Horror-filled yet hilarious adventures. The mystery plot is intricate and the solution satisfying. Bring on another Andrew Mayhem mystery soon. Please! Highly recommended.

Product Details

ISBN-13:
9781594263484
Publisher:
Mundania Press
Publication date:
03/28/2005
Pages:
192
Product dimensions:
6.00(w) x 9.00(h) x 0.44(d)

What People are Saying About This

Karen McCullough
Dark humor isn't easy to carry off and the author has done a fine job of it. The mystery is developed at a nice pace that keeps tightening the suspense, finally upping the odds to a nearly unbearable level. It builds steadily to a nail-biting climax and a surprising and satisfying resolution. Probably the funniest and cleverest story I've read in some time. (Karen McCullough, author of A Question of Fire and The Rainbow Bridge
Elizabeth Delisi
If the members of Monty Python got together with Rod Serling to write a book, this might be the result! Jeff Strand has penned a witty, hilarious yet macabre tale of murder and mayhem. Don't miss Graverobbers Wanted (No Experience Necessary). It's a fiendish delight! (Elizabeth Delisi, author of Since All is Passing)
Jackie Kramer
One word: WOW!!! A horrific blend of tongue-in-cheek humor with edge-of-your-seat suspense. Graverobbers Wanted is not for the faint of heart, but if you like your thrills at a visceral level, Mr. Strand delivers them with every page. (Jackie Kramer, author of Broken Pledge)

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Graverobbers Wanted (No Experience Necessary) 4.1 out of 5 based on 0 ratings. 13 reviews.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
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Kay2001 More than 1 year ago
Imagine agreeing to dig up a grave because you are so desperate for money, only to find out the dead body is not dead! Then getting in way over your head trying to figure out what is going on. That is exactly what happened to our hero Andrew Mayhem. Fitting last name by the way. I enjoyed the "mayhem" that took place in this witty book. The characters were quite original and funny in their own strange ways. The plot was fast moving with enough twists and turns to keep you guessing while you are laughing and shaking your head. Recommended for anyone who likes a good mystery with some blood and lots of laughs. Nice rainy day read.
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Kaeme More than 1 year ago
I really enjoyed this author's other books "How to rescue a dead princess" and "Elrod McBugle on the loose" and thus decided to take a leap and buy all of his books that were available on the nook. This book had several humorous moments but was altogether too dark and ultimately too graphic for me. I like to think I have a pretty strong stomach but I actually had trouble finishing this book and have no desire to see small children in deadly peril. It was almost like one of those movies where so many comically bad things keep happening to the main character that you are actually uncomfortable watching the film(Like "Meet the Parents") except that the laughter does not relieve the state of tension that you are in for the entire book. I have not yet been inspired to read the rest of the books in the series but would recommend the other two mentioned above.
IYamVixenBooks More than 1 year ago
I bought GRAVEROBBERS...based on the interview that JA Konrath and Jeff Strand did with each other back in March, I think. This book made me laugh and scared the bejeezus out of me. Andrew is trying to find his niche in life. Some might call him a slacker. I know I'd be hard pressed to be married to a guy like this..maybe could be a friend. He's smart and funny, really a smartass is what he is and I am drawn to funny smart smartasses.... He and his buddy, Roger, find themselves pulled into a way to make $20,000. All they have to do is dig up a coffin carrying the body of the husband of the woman who hired them. Then all hell breaks loose. Andrew is fairly quick on his feet in a believable way. I really never felt the need to roll my eyes at any time while reading his terror filled adventure. He finds himself in this situation, he continues with the terror filled mystery when others would have just given in. And it felt real. I imagine this book would be what the never-ending series of 'Saw' flicks could be like. The murder, torture, and the mechanisms used to get there are beyond my normal ick factor, yet I couldn't stop reading the story. Five terror and funny beans.....
Guest More than 1 year ago
This book is a must read for thriller and comedy readers alike. I picked this book up and couldn't put it down. Jeff Strand has witty prose and smart dialouge--it's been a long time since I've had such an entertaining read. I can't wait for the next Andrew Mayhem book and look forward to more great reads from this very talented author.