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Grieving the Loss of a Loved One
By Kathe Wunnenberg
ZondervanCopyright © 2000 Kathe Wunnenberg
All right reserved.
Chapter OneSection 1 Denying Your Journey Through Denial
Denying: to declare untrue, to disclaim connection with or responsibility for, to refuse to accept.
God never comes through the door that I hold open for Him, But always knocks at the one place which I have walled up with concrete. But if I do not let Him in there, He turns away altogether. Helmut Thielicke
It's a funny thing about grief-handling it efficiently doesn't make it go away. Author Unknown
How do I manage a difficulty? Well, at first I try to walk past it. If that does not help, I try to climb over it; and when I cannot climb over it, to crawl underneath. And when that is not possible, I go straight through-God and me. Corrie ten Boom Clippings From My Notebook
Devotion 1 Journey Through the Fog to Reality
You can't heal a wound by saying it's not there! Jeremiah 6:14, tlb
You may encounter some of these feelings when facing the reality of your loss. At times you may feel as if you're walking on a road through a dense fog, stumbling through the nothingness that surrounds you, groping for an escape yet finding none.
Getting fogged in was a common occurrence when we lived in Oregon. Most mornings I would peer out our family room window expecting to see fir trees and mountains, only to find they had vanished once again.
Whenever the fog rolled in, I felt out of control, thinking about airport delays and white-knuckle driving. Over time, though, I learned to cope with the eerie white vapor and to forge through it-sometimes with the help of my car's high beams. I realized the impairment was temporary, and that gave me hope to endure. By afternoon the fog would lift, and I could see clearly again.
That's how it is with grief. Our initial shock over a loved one's death may cause us to deny it or ignore it. We may feel lost, paralyzed, in limbo, somewhere between reality and a dream.
This can't be happening! you think.
But it is.
I don't want to face it!
But you have to.
Maybe not right this moment. That's okay. But if you want to journey through grief, you must look beyond the clouds created by denial and fears. With God's strength and in His timing, the fog will begin to clear, and you'll be able to see reality again. It may not be what you want to see, and it may look quite different than before, but it is a necessary part of your journey through grief.
How are you coping with your loss? When you look out the window of your circumstance today, what do you see? Are you in the fog, denying reality? Or is the fog beginning to clear to reveal a new landscape?
Lord, it's so hard to cope with what has happened. I don't want to believe my loved one is gone. I keep hoping I'll wake up and discover this is only a dream. I feel so unsure about where I am right now. I can't see what life should look like. Please help me through this part of the journey. You say that You will never leave me or forsake me and that You will be a lamp to my feet. Please be my headlights and lead me through this time of uncertainty and pain. Amen.
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My Personal Journey
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Excerpted from Grieving the Loss of a Loved One by Kathe Wunnenberg Copyright © 2000 by Kathe Wunnenberg. Excerpted by permission.
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